Off Limits
by wwechaingangbabe
Summary: John Cena can no longer deny his feelings for Randy's bestfriend. So what happens when Randy's proven to be an overprotective barrier? Well, John tries to capture her heart the only way he knows how.
1. My Best Friend's Girl

Your best friend's girl should be off-limits.

However, John Cena didn't see it that way. He's always had a thing for Randy's girl and although he rarely acted on it, his interest was there, and it was growing. He made no effort to let anyone know of his desire, but that was okay. Randy didn't need to know John had a little crush on his best friend. If John was interested in his wife, that'd be a different story. But he was interested in Alyssa, the only girl Randy's known since preschool.

Alyssa was oblivious to all this as well. Her and John were good friends, but she never did anything to suggest she saw him as something more. In fact, she never really seemed interested in having a relationship with anyone.

This fact prompted John to start a conversation with Randy as they were getting ready for another Monday night Raw. "I feel like Alyssa never had a boyfriend in all this time I've known her."

Randy chuckled. "Because she hasn't. Not since high-school, at least."

John raised his eyebrows. "That was over ten years ago. Don't you think she deserves a man-"

Randy abruptly cut him off. "Eh, yeah. I'm sure she'd be a great girlfriend, but she doesn't need a douche bag around."

In his head, Randy was the epitome of the _only_ man needed in her life. That self-claimed mentality formed him into this overprotective figure that, somehow, went unnoticed amongst everyone else. The many times he suggested Alyssa's date was no good aroused no one's suspicion. He'd subtly controlled her love life so well, it was hard to measure if Alyssa was simply letting him. It was obvious she was in no rush to find her prince charming, and Randy definitely had his way with that.

John, being Randy's other best friend, knew a bit about these tactics. He'd heard Randy brag about the few men he'd gotten rid of, but it never phased him. That is, until he realized he may be Alyssa's next suitor.

It'd been in his interest to finally do something about the way he felt, but he knew it was crucial to hide it from Randy for as long as possible. Alyssa was worth a lot, and he didn't want his chances ruined before they even began.

He kept that in mind as he continued his conversation with Randy. "Well, how is Alyssa supposed to know who's a douche bag and who's not if she never gives anyone a try?"

Randy's signature smirk suddenly appeared on his face. "That's simple, John. She'll know because I'll tell her the difference."

"But you think everyone's a douche bag when it comes to Alyssa."

Randy shrugged. "And she agrees."

John absently chewed on his bottom lip. He's right, Alyssa has always agreed. Do these two best friends think alike or was Randy just impeccable at convincing and manipulating? Either way, John was determined to woo Alyssa whether Randy liked it or not.

* * *

Dinner the next day proved to John it would be a hard task. Around the table sat Randy and his wife Sam, across from John and Alyssa. This group was typical. It was Randy's seven year-old concoction of his favorite people. To others, it was like a double date unbeknownst to all members.

This night was a special night. John was more aware of Alyssa. Her long chestnut hair looked silkier than usual, her smile looked brighter than usual, her hazel eyes twinkled more than usual. But this was nothing really out of the usual. He'd concluded time and time again that Alyssa grew more beautiful after every time he saw her. He was so caught up in these thoughts that he missed an important part of the table's conversation.

"…give it a shot. I think he'd be really good for you Alyssa," Sam mentioned.

John nearly gave his neck a cramp when he turned to look at Alyssa. How on earth did this come about? To his relief, she didn't look too excited.

"Sam, is this another one of those criminals you work with?" Randy spat.

John, knowing all to well this may be the last time Randy's in his favor, cleared his throat.

"Like I'd set up Al with a criminal," Sam replied. She leaned into the table a little more, directing all her attention on Alyssa. "He's a decent guy who shares the same values as you."

Peeking over at her, John anxiously shifted into his seat.

Sam continued. "I believe in this guy so much, I went ahead and invited him to drinks with us later tonight."

"What?" the other three said in unison.

"What's the problem?" Sam asked innocently, looking from one person to the next.

"Why would you invite a random guy to hang out with us?" Randy questioned.

"He's not a random guy," Sam defended. "There's nothing wrong with inviting someone new right?"

Silence.

"Alyssa, if you want me to uninvite him, I will, but otherwise, I think it'd be a great idea for you two to mingle."

Alyssa took her drink and shrugged. Out of the three, she was the most at ease about Sam's proposition, Randy being the least. "The uninviting wont be necessary. It's fine, I mean…it's not like I'm being arranged to marry the guy."

She shot Randy a charming look and smiled. "Don't worry, _dad_. I know you're just worried, but I think I can manage making a new friend."

Vocally absent from most of the conversation, John cleared his throat again. He looked at Alyssa who appeared to be busy thinking of this new guy she was going to meet. Trying to ignore the pinching in his chest, he plastered a smile on his face and downed the rest of his beer.

This was going to be a long night.

* * *

That statement felt just as true a couple hours later. This new guy had been in their booth for fifteen minutes, but John could've sworn a whole hour had passed by. Everyone was coupled up. Everyone but him. Just like dinner, he'd spoken very minimally, but again, no one seemed to notice. Or so he thought.

He was in the middle of downing his second bottle when he felt a hand on his arm. He turned slightly and was met by Alyssa's face.

"Why are you so quiet?" she asked him.

Not knowing how to answer, John turned the attention to her. "How's your date going?"

"I'm not really feelin' the guy," she shrugs.

John suddenly let go of the bottle he'd been clinging onto all night. "What do you wanna do then?"

"I don't know," Alyssa pouted. "I don't wanna give the boy mixed signals."

"I think I could help with that," John smiled. He didn't wait another second to swing his arm around her shoulders. She reciprocated by resting her head comfortably on the curve of his neck.

Randy caught this intimate interaction and at first, had a questioning look. Then he realized it was John's way of helping him get the new guy away from Alyssa. Little did he know, it doubled as John's way of getting even closer.

"Thank you," she said to him.

John replied by tightening his grip on her.

The new guy got a glimpse of this as well and suddenly, the atmosphere began to shift. Awkward tension was building, but with alcohol's presence, things were going to be just fine.

* * *

The same could not be said for the following night. This time, it was just Randy, John, and Alyssa sharing a bottle of Henny in a hotel room. Randy ended up drinking a majority it. It was no secret to any of them, despite the calmness of the night before, that Randy and Sam were having issues. He took it out on the alcohol and by the second hour, John and Alyssa were struggling to keep him manageable. He was angry, bitter, and hurt all at the same time.

He was a mess.

John didn't realize how much of a mess Randy was until he returned from the bathroom and caught him trying to kiss Alyssa. They were in the corner of the room with Randy's hands secure on her forearms.

"Randyyyyy! Stop!" she fused, pushing him back. "You're drunk!"

"I don't caaaaaaaareeee, I don't care about fucking Sam." He shoved himself onto his best friend a little more, pushing John to physically intervene.

"Randy, get off!" John hooked his arm across Randy's chest to pull him off, but the drunk man reciprocated with a punch. Whatever it was he was aiming for, his fist swung full force into air.

"What the fuck was that?" John kept a good distance between the two of them, trying his best not to take the punch personally.

"You're the one that said she deserved a man." Randy pointed at John, then at himself. "He's right here."

"Nah, look at you man, you're drunk!" John's voice bled with anger.

Inebriated Randy said nothing else and walked limply towards the bed. The other two watched his heavy mass fall right onto the mattress.

"I'ma just sleep," he mumbled.

John then directed his attention to Alyssa and asked if she was okay. She meekly nodded and said, "I just need some fresh air in the balcony."

He watched her open the sliding door before taking a seat on a chair stationed in front of the bed. Placing both elbows on his knees, he ran his hands through his hair and sighed. His line of vision fell to Randy who appeared to be fast asleep. Despite his heavy breathing, it was the most comfortable he's looked all night. Sensing Randy was going to be fine, John decided to check up on Alyssa.

"Hey, you sure you're okay?" he asked as he slid the door closed behind him.

Not taking her eyes away from the view of the city, she nodded. "Yeah, I am. It's just hard seeing him like that. He's a wreck."

John let out a shaky breath. "No kidding."

"I love them both to death, but their relationship hasn't been healthy for awhile. They're okay, then they're not. They're okay, then they're not."

"They _pretend _to be okay."

"And they ignore the problem."

The two stood in silence for a few seconds, allowing their emotions to sink in.

Alyssa turned to look at John, desperate to change the mood. "But hey, Randy mentioned something earlier- something about you saying I deserved a man?"

Nervous, John chuckled. "Oh…yeah…I…uh…I…we…talked about you…this one day."

Alyssa narrowed her eyes playfully. "Oh yeah?"

John nodded slowly, but didn't say anything. He thanked God it was night time. It helped camouflage his rosy cheeks, but he still couldn't look at her.

"Wanna tell me what was said?"

He shrugged. "Just that you deserved someone good in your life."

She raised her eyebrows. "You said that, or he said that?"

"I said that."

She nodded. "That's what I thought. And why would you?"

Feeling his shoulders relax a little, he leaned his face towards hers. "Because it'd be a waste if you didn't share yourself with someone else."

"Why so?"

"Do you know how lucky he'd be to have you?"

Smiling, Alyssa turned the question on him. "So why are you single?"

"Simple. My career makes it difficult."

"That's bullshit. Difficulty shouldn't stop you."

"You're right," John nodded with a grin on his face. "So what's stopping you?"

"I just haven't had luck."

"You haven't been looking."

"Well, I don't needa look. They can look for me."

John hung onto her words for awhile. He looked at her, much deeper than he's ever looked at her, much deeper than he's ever looked at anyone.

He then said, "Oh, I'm looking at you, alright."

She didn't say anything, but the way she looked at him said it all. Their eyes were their best form of communication.

The two continued to stand in silence, lips still formed into smiles. The connection between them, what's always been there but was always ignored, could not be denied now.

Seeing her shiver, John fought through his crazy palpitations and said, "You seem cold, do you wanna go inside?"

Shaking her head with a smile still on her face, she replied, "No, I wanna stay here."

"That's fine, but you cant keep shivering like that."

"So what now?" she teased.

He didn't hesitate to offer his arm to her, which she wrapped herself in comfortably. He took a whiff of her hair and swore this moment justified his existence.

Resting his lip on her temple, he asked, "What are you doing tomorrow?"

"I don't know, yet."

"Spend it with me."

"Okay," she said sweetly, looking up at him.

And suddenly, the whole world that once felt flawed seemed perfect now.

* * *

**Yes, I am back and have so much in store for this new story. Question is, what do ya'll think? Kindly leave a review in the box below, and I'd greatly appreciate it! (:**


	2. The Third Man

"I'm really sorry about last night."

Alyssa barely had her door open before Randy managed to etch out that apology. He was holding out the complimentary chocolate from his hotel room that he knew was her favorite. Taking it into her hand, she smiled. "Are you feeling better now?"

"A bit, I just have a hangover."

"Nothing breakfast can't fix."

"Yeah, wanna go get some with me?"

"I'd love to, but I got plans already."

He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Oh?"

"Yeah," she said, thinking, please don't ask questions.

Randy retracted easily. "Alright. Well…I better go feed this hangover."

"You go do that," Alyssa smiled. "Thanks for the chocolate."

"No problem." Randy held out his hand to give her a hug.

And for some reason, Alyssa was hit with a feeling of guilt. Unsure why, she hugged her best friend like usual, then brushed her thoughts away as she retreated back into her room.

John was going to pick her up in thirty minutes, and she still needed to get ready. Prior to Randy knocking on her door, she'd spent a good twenty minutes trying on different outfits. She couldn't seem to be satisfied with her appearance, when usually, she didn't care. But something was different today, and it all started last night. It all started with John.

Finally, she decided on khaki shorts and a teal sleeveless button up. Since they were going to spend all day together, she figured it'd be best she wear flat sandals. She continued to get ready, and before she knew it, another knock came at her door.

"Fuck," she cursed to herself. She hadn't done final touches on her make-up. Taking in a deep breath, she walked towards the door and opened it.

"Hey there," John greeted, his eyes set on hers.

Suddenly, Alyssa didn't care how she looked. The way he looked at her made her feel like the most beautiful girl in the world.

"Hey," she smiled offering herself to a hug.

He placed both arms securely around her waist as she reached for his neck. The two stayed in this position longer than they anticipated, but neither of them were complaining.

"You ready to go?" John said into her ear.

She pulled away just enough to look up at him. "Yeah, but is my make up alright? I didn't finished putting it on."

John chuckled. "You shouldn't even be wearing that junk."

She pouted.

"But yes." John swiped a finger across her forehead to move some hair out of the way. "You look beautiful, just like always."

She let go of him and smiled. "And you're wearing a white shirt and some khaki shorts."

John looked down at himself then back at her. "Yeah, I am."

Holding onto her smile, she said, "I remember saying that was my favorite combo on you."

Nodding with a cheesy smile of his own, John winked and said, "I remember, too."

The two laughed in unison before making their way through the hallway. They waited in front of the elevators in silence, forcing Alyssa to stare.

"What?" John asked, not taking long to catch her. He was just about to stare, too.

"I'm admiring your dimples," she answered.

John chuckled, feeling warmth and redness flush his cheeks. "You commented on them the first day we met."

"I did, I did. They're cute on you," Alyssa complimented. "That's something I've always known."

John quickly picked up on what she said. "Anything new you know now?"

A loud ping announced an empty elevator's arrival which both of them walked into. The doors closed a few seconds after John pressed a button.

"Well," Alyssa looked at him straight in the eye. "I'm still tryna figure that out."

John nodded. "Maybe you'll know by the end of the day."

"If it takes me that long," she smiled.

It was obvious what both of them were referring to.

It was also becoming obvious to Alyssa that John's looked at her as more than a friend for much longer than a day. She, on the other hand, always saw him as a great man, but him being Randy's other best friend automatically put him in the off-limits zone. Now that she thought about it, that reason seemed trivial.

It was becoming clear to her that she would've missed out on a good thing if she hadn't crossed that line last night.

Another ping came, this time announcing they were in the lobby. The two walked out in silence, managing their way through the throng of people. They knew people were staring, but they weren't sure if it was because John Cena was there or because he was with Alyssa. Either way, the two just wanted to get out of there and be alone.

"Where are we going?" Alyssa asked once they got into his car.

John smiled as he backed out of his parking spot. "Think of the first time we met."

* * *

_"Randy, I just broke up with my boyfriend, let me have some fun will you?" Alyssa threw sand to his chest before taking a seat on the ostrich chair beside him._

_"You are having fun, aren't you?" he laughed, dusting off the debris she'd laid on him._

_"Yeah but not if you keep messing with every guy that talks to me." She felt good in her pink two-piece, but her best friend managed to deflate her bubble._

_"That last one could fit into your skinny jeans!" Randy gladly pointed out. He nudged her side with his elbow. "Is that what you want, huh? Is that your type? Was that your dream man?"_

_"No!" Alyssa pouted. She pushed her sunglasses a little higher on her nose bridge. "But still."_

_"Relax, relax." Randy placated. "I'll introduce you to a good friend of mine. I met him during training a few months ago."_

_"Is he cute?"_

_"He's off-limits."_

_"What the-"_

_"You told me you didn't wanna date a wrestler, right? He could be your other best friend, though. You know, when I'm not around?" Randy smirked._

_"You're so full of yourself."_

_"You love me."_

_Alyssa looked at him through her shades, her lips stiff. "Unfortunately."_

_He was about to nudge her again but an interruption came from behind them._

_"Randy!" someone called out._

_He looked back and nodded. "Ay, you guys brought beer!"_

_"How could we not?" one of the guys said._

_Alyssa looked at each of them, seemingly uninterested. She'd met two of the guys, and one of them was taken. The other simply gave her the chills and not the good kind. She'd caught him stare so many times, she was beginning to wonder if he's ever seen a woman before._

_Then she noticed the third man._

_That's probably the guy Randy was talking about, she thought. Not bad. Not bad at all._

_She stood up and walked up to them. "Hey."_

_Randy welcomed her into the circle. "You guys know Alyssa right?"_

_John, the third man, looked at her. He's seen many pretty faces before and this was another one._

_"We haven't been introduced," Alyssa said to Randy, her eyes on John._

_"His name's John," Randy said plainly. "And this is Alyssa."_

_"Nice to meet you." John extended his hand, but instead of shaking it, she took it as an invitation for a hug._

_"Woah, you comfortable there, Al?" Randy commented, his facial expression showing no signs of approval._

_"Oh, get that stick outta your ass." Alyssa jabbed his arm._

_John couldn't help but laugh. "That stick gets thicker and thicker every day."_

_Randy shook his head and took the first beer. "I have asses as friends."_

_"You love my ass," Alyssa winked._

_Randy didn't deny that fact as he closely watched her mingle with the new guy he'd introduced her to._

* * *

It took John and Alyssa until they got situated on the sand to finish reminiscing. They were sitting close, but not touching.

"So John, tell me."

He looked at her, unsure as to what she meant. "Tell you what?"

"When did you know?"

Furrowing his brows, John asked, "know what?"

"Was it the night I looked after you when you were drunk? Or those days I took care of you when you were sick? Or was it when we played that prank on Randy?"

A soft chuckle escaped his lips. A bit shy, he looked down before looking back at her. "Oh, it was way before that."

Curious, Alyssa simply looked at him and said nothing. Her silence was her way of urging him to continue.

"I was definitely attracted to you right away. Physically of course, since I didn't really know you back then. But uh," John paused as if he were running their history in his mind. "It was the second week, when we went hiking."

"Oh?" she had trouble recalling this event.

"You fell and got the biggest, deepest, meanest cut on your leg and yet, you still had the most fun."

"Oh gosh! I was trying so hard to distract myself from the pain."

"Well you did a good job," John commended. "It was so good you distracted me, too."

"Oh yeah? Cena has pain?"

"Hell yeah, I do."

"You're damn good at distracting yourself too, then. I never hear you complain."

John picked up some sand then sifted it through his fingers. "Well, I never saw the need to complain. Especially when I'm talking to you."

Alyssa blushed. "Even when you don't talk to me, you still cheesin."

"What can I say, you leave that much of an impression," John winked.

"Oh shut up," she laughed.

John laughed too. "Is this weird?"

"Us?"

"Yeah."

"I don't feel weird."

"Neither do I," John said, smiling.

And that feeling stayed for the remainder of their day.

John couldn't believe he was actually on a day-long date with Alyssa: the girl who's had his heart even before she wanted it. He wasn't even sure if she wanted it now, but by the way she held his gaze and massaged the back of his hand as he held hers, he was almost sure she was getting there.

And she was. Going on this date with John turned out to be the best decision she's made in a long time. She just couldn't decide which surprised her more: this date or how long it took to happen. Whichever it was, she was glad to be there. She was glad to offer a part of herself she never knew existed.

* * *

John contently replayed the date as he walked himself to his room. They hadn't kissed, but the vivid images of her smiling up at him, holding him, laughing with him, was enough to get him through until the next time he saw her. Which, they had decided earlier, would be at breakfast.

His thoughts were interrupted when someone hollered his name. He knew instantly who's voice it belonged to. It was Randy's.

"Hey man, I haven't seen you all day."

John nodded. "Yeah, I've been out. You feelin any better from last night?"

"Eh sure… I was pretty crazy wasn't I?"

"Hell yeah. What was that all about? You tried to kiss-"

Randy interjected before John even finished. "I don't remember what happened, okay?"

John didn't say anything. He studied Randy's face.

"You know I was drunk. I don't remember anything," Randy repeated definitively.

John's mouth stayed firmly shut. He carefully assimilated these words, wondering why Randy felt the need to repeat himself. Who was he trying to convince? For a person who claimed to not remember anything, he was coming off more defensive than he should. What was he trying so hard to conceal?

John's curiosity was amplified when Randy repeated himself for the third time. "I really don't remember what I did, so let's not ever bring that up. I'ma head to bed now."

Randy's sudden dismissal didn't ease John's mind one bit. He watched him walk away, tension clearly present in his posture. He wasn't sure what to make of the conversation but something told him that Randy wasn't telling much of the truth.

* * *

**Well, what'd you guys think? I love and appreciate feedback! Thanks to SandraSmit19, therealchamps, Playdohx, wickedly-pure, my time is now, and EveCandiceCenaOrton4lifee for reviewing! Next chapter, the trio will be face to face once again (:**


	3. Couldn't Get More Foreign

**Yay! Updating earlier than my usual! I'd like to thank ****SandraSmit19, therealchamps, wickedly-pure, my time is now, and EveCandiceCenaOrton4lifee for your wonderful reviews! Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

Those blue eyes haunted Alyssa.

It was all she could think about the morning after her date with John. Boy was it driving her crazy. She's looked into them thousands, if not millions, of times, but she was not looking forward to the next time. How would those blue eyes see her when she tells him she's falling in love with his best friend? Would those blue eyes still look at her the same? How would he react? _How?_

This questioned startled her. How _would _Randy react to all of this?

These questions suffocated her to no end, and she couldn't understand why it gave her so much anxiety. She'd been awake for awhile but hasn't been able to get out of bed. The terror paralyzed her. Should she have told Randy she was going on a date with John that morning he came to her door? Would that have made this morning a little more manageable? If nothing was wrong with going on that date, why did she feel the need to hide it from him? They're best friends and they tell each other everything. _Everything_. When did the meaning of everything suddenly change?

Alyssa wasn't surprised the hand she lifted to her forehead was shaking. She nearly jumped when her phone emitted sound. After sifting through the sheets to find it, she saw John's name on the screen. Immediately, her heart went lax. He'd sent her a text saying, _goodmorning beautiful, I cant wait to see you_.

And I can't wait to see you either, she thought. Taking in a deep breath, she forced herself out of bed and got ready. Her morning was going to be significantly better once got herself to breakfast.

And she was absolutely right. Every single worry she had went away as soon as she caught sight of Cena. He was wearing a black shirt with khaki shorts. It was her other favorite combo on him. She's never seen anyone look so good in the morning.

"Hey there," she greeted once she caught up to him. He was waiting for her in front of the canteen.

He smiled. "Hey. You ready to eat?"

"Always," she said.

The two walked in and got situated right away. They each brimmed their plates, not wanting a future disruption of having to get up for a second round. All they wanted was to sit down and be together. Sleep had them separated long enough.

"So how was your sleep?" Alyssa asked.

John took a healthy bite of his omelet. "Good. It was good."

She believed him, but she also picked up on the bit of hesitation in his voice. Not sure how to get it out of him, she went ahead and answered her own question. "Mine was good too. I just didn't feel too well when I woke up."

"Oh yeah? Why not?"

"I don't know…I just…" she trailed off, not sure if it was a good idea to bring up Randy.

John looked at her, seemingly interested in what she had to say.

How could she not tell him? Even before things happened between them, he'd always made her feel welcome to say everything and anything. Randy was right when he said that John could be her other best friend.

"I had these nagging thoughts of Randy."

A lump formed in John's throat at the mention of his name. The same name that kept him from sleep the night before. "Same here, except it was last night."

"Do you think it's our guilt…" Alyssa trailed off again. She still didn't know what she was feeling guilty about.

John intercepted right away. "Our guilt for what? Alyssa, we're doing anything wrong."

"I know we're not," she said softly. By now, both of them were staring at her untouched plate.

"So why do you feel guilty?" John shifted his eyes back to hers.

"Because I tell Randy everything, and I haven't told him this? I don't know."

As much as John wanted to keep this from Randy for as long as possible, he wasn't willing to compromise that with Alyssa's peace of mind. So he suggested, "tell him then."

"No," she said tentatively.

John didn't say anything. He wanted to give her time to gather her thoughts.

"I mean…I wanna see where we-" she paused, surprised how natural 'we' sounded. "-where we go before I share it with anyone else."

John couldn't hide his satisfaction at what he just heard. We. They were not one, but two people formed into something together. Wanting to ease her mind, he tried to bring in a voice of reason. "Look, we're grown adults. We don't have to report everything to Randy right away, and you don't have to feel guilty for that."

"You're absolutely right," Alyssa nodded convinced. "You're absolutely right."

It wasn't until now that she noticed how much Randy weighed on her. Finally, she had a reason to let go of these predisposed values that he had unintentionally, or intentionally, inflicted on her. She looked up at the reason and stared into his eyes, feeling thankful for his very existence.

"So why were _you_ thinking of him last night?"

"I saw him." John forked more food but kept it on the plate. He was trying to decide how to tell her the story. "He was acting weird about that night he tried to kiss you."

_That night he tried to kiss you. _The words sounded as foreign as that night. She'd nearly forgotten about that. "How was he acting weird?"

John spun his coffee mug slowly. "He just kept saying he didn't remember what he did and asked that I never bring it up. It didn't make sense why he was being so defensive about it."

"Maybe he's ashamed of how he was and just wants to forget about it?" Alyssa suggested.

Or maybe he wants to avoid being interrogated about why he tried to kiss you. Or why he claimed to be the man for you. John thought, but he didn't say it out loud.

He wanted to, but before he could decide, someone's shadow hovered over their table.

"Wow, no invite?" a third voice said.

A moment of silence passed before all three of them realized each other's presence.

Alyssa was the first to filter through the shock of seeing Randy there. "Sorry, Rands. I guess I got used to you sleeping in." Which was the truth, but it wasn't the reason why he wasn't invited.

"Yeah well, I haven't even slept." Randy took a chair from another table and sat in between them. The condition of his face confirmed he wasn't lying. The bags under his eyes looked just as bad as he did on his drunken rampage.

Concerned, John asked, "what's going on with you?"

"My marriage is falling apart," he expressed bluntly. "That's all I can comprehend right now."

"Fix it," John said. He waited a few seconds for a reply but received none. So, he continued and said, "since when did you stop fixing things that were broken?"

"When I realized it was something I never wanted."

That momentous statement nearly sucked the air out of Alyssa's lungs. He sounded convincing, but she still wasn't buying it. "That's a lie Randy. You happily married her six years ago, you can't say you never-"

"I'm not denying anything. It's the truth, and I realize that now. I'm not with the right person, and I wouldn't be acting this crazy if I was."

"Not with the right person?" Alyssa questioned. How many foreign lines could she take in one morning?

"If Sam's the wrong person, tell me then, who's right?" John asked.

Randy said nothing. He looked down with his hands clasped together. Then he looked at Alyssa.

She stared at him, with curiosity, trying so hard to understand, trying so hard to see how this could have happened. She was the maid of honor in that wedding and now that marriage was falling apart? All because he realized, after seven years, that he was with the wrong person? How do you even begin to explain that? How could seven years suddenly mean nothing?

Randy cleared his throat. He separated his hands and leaned back on the chair. "Look, I'm not denying my marriage with Sam. I just see something greater for myself."

"_Now_ you see something greater?" John couldn't comprehend this. He shifted his eyes from Randy to Alyssa then to Randy again. He'd be damned if by something greater, he meant Alyssa.

"Honestly, I've always seen greater, have always _known_ greater. I just can't deny it now."

The other two sat in silence, unsure what to think, what to say, what to make of this. They were dumbfounded. As Randy's best friends, they felt as good as a stranger. They knew the couple had issues, but it never occurred to them it was irreparable. Or at least, as irreparable as Randy was making it out to be.

"Well," Randy broke in the silence. "That was a little too much for breakfast. I have a signing to get ready for. I better go."

The troubled man got up from the table and put the chair back where he'd gotten it. Before disappearing out of sight, he looked at Alyssa and asked, "If you're not busy later, can I see you?"

She wasn't busy later, but she'd hoped to spend it with John.

"Sure," she said against her own wish.

And with that, John and Alyssa were left alone once again.

"Wow," was all John could say.

"I don't get it," Alyssa said. "I don't doubt his sincerity, but I don't get it."

John settled his clenched fist on the table and shrugged. "I guess you're not the only one who hasn't been saying everything."

* * *

Alyssa couldn't stop thinking about John. When they parted after breakfast, she wondered when it was she'd see him next. When he began texting her after his workout, she got excited about the plans he'd suggested to her. When she was with Randy, she was thinking of John.

Her best friend had to repeat himself a couple times before she finally snapped out of it.

"Hello?"

A hand waved across her face, bringing her right back to earth. She followed the hand and was led to Randy's face. They were sitting on the couch of his locker room.

"I'm sorry, what?" she asked, still a little absent-minded.

"We should go on our vacations again. I need one right now."

"Rands, what you _need_ is to deal with the problem."

"But I can't deal with it properly without a clear head," Randy reasoned. "Come on, we haven't been on a vacation in years."

"Yeah, ever since you got married-"

"Don't you remember fighting about this?" he pointed out. "A year into my marriage, you complained that we stopped going on our trips. Let's bring it back now."

"After five years? No Randy, I'm fine."

"Why not?"

Because I'd rather not be away from John, she thought. Because you hadn't thought of this before your marriage started failing. "I just don't think it's a good time."

"What do you mean? It's the perfect time!" Randy expressed.

Her silence suggested that she disagreed.

"Come on. At least think about it," he pleaded.

Alyssa looked unconvinced, but of course, her natural tendencies that she's had for years began to overtake her current judgment. "Okay. I'll think about it."

"We'll go to Europe," he said, knowing all too well that was the best hook.

Her eyes lit up. "_Now_ you wanna go to Europe? That's the place I've been asking you for!"

"Now's the chance!" A big smile was on his face.

She almost forgot how charming her best friend was. "I'll...I'll think about it."

"Are you really gonna question going to Europe? We'll tour Italy, France, Greece, and all those other countries you have on your list."

Before Randy managed to do more convincing, someone knocked on the door. He wasn't too pleased with this interruption.

"Who is it?" he yelled.

"It's John."

Randy got up and opened the door. "Wssup?"

"I need y'alls advice. I only have until tomorrow to decide."

The two best friends looked at each other as John walked in. He took a seat on a steel chair, while Randy regained his spot next to Alyssa.

"I got offered to do a movie," John announced.

"Sounds like a good opportunity," Randy commented. He waited for the catch.

"Yeah and it's being filmed in Australia. I'd have to take a three month leave off of work."

Things could not get any more foreign, Alyssa thought. She looked at John, studying his expression. It didn't take long for her to see that he was mirroring her own feelings. Neither of them wanted to leave, neither of them wanted the distance. It took so long for them to finally put each other together, and this would just break it apart.

Alyssa groaned inwardly. She knew John had been itching to expand his career, and who is she to stop him from that?

So, above all her selfish reservations, the separation anxiety, and personal insecurities, Alyssa held onto hope and faith instead.

"You should take it, John," she advised. We'll be fine. _We'll be fine. _

And she knew that he carried the same faith when he looked her in the eye and said, "Alright, I'll take it."

* * *

**Yes, John will be away. And yes, Randy's reaction to them dating is yet to come. But I will sporadically be using flashbacks to help fill in some blanks. I hope you all enjoyed that chapter! Please feel free to leave a review down below. I'd really appreciate it(: **


	4. Moment of Impact

**Enjoy everyone! Thanks to therealchamps and my time is now for your awesome reviews! (:**

* * *

Alyssa's been a part of John for years, but the difference now is, he couldn't resist her. Everything, absolutely everything, reminded him of her. When he woke up that morning, he remembered her bare face and how he loved mornings when she didn't wear make-up. When he got dressed, he made sure to put on khaki shorts and a black or white shirt. When he got out of his room, he guessed what drink she'd want to order.

They had planned to meet up at the Starbucks across the hotel at noon, and he was right on time. She, on the other hand, was early.

John barely took a second to look at Alyssa before he noticed something was wrong. He immediately wrapped an arm around her shoulder then said, "you're too damn pretty to be doing that."

He hoped this startled her enough to at least etch out a laugh.

And he did. Alyssa's facial expression was transformed from sad to snappy. Playful snappy, of course. "What, pretty girls can't stare out windows?"

John didn't mind her sarcasm. He was just happy he'd gotten that frown out of her face. "No, silly. You looked sad."

She shrugged. "I am sad."

"Why?"

"Because." she didn't finish her sentence. Instead, she contently settled her head on his shoulder.

"Because?" John's skin tingled at her touch.

She popped her head back up and ignored his question. "Lets order our drinks?"

John removed his arm from her and sat down. "Not until you tell me what's wrong."

She pouted and waited a few seconds before saying, "I just miss you already."

This forced a good chuckle out of John. She could not get any cuter, he thought. "Aren't you the one good at distracting yourself?"

She pouted some more. "I guess not."

"You can't distract yourself from me, huh? I'm your weakness."

Rolling her eyes, Alyssa got up and walked away.

His eyes followed her. "Hey, where you going?"

"I'ma order my drink."

"Playing hard to get, I see," John mumbled. He got behind her in line, guessing she'd get a java chip or a green tea latte.

"A grande java chip with no whip," he heard her say.

He smiled as he ordered his own, then paid for the both of them.

"Hey! No!" Alyssa protested. "Take my card," she told the cashier as she fumbled with her purse.

John handed over his money before she got the chance to open her wallet. "Sorry, too slow."

She jabbed his chest then moved out of the way to let the others order. "You're an ass."

"Relax, grumpy pants. I miss you too."

She looked at him, as if she needed his eyes to coincide with his words. He was right. He was her weakness, and she wasn't sure how to handle it. She's never felt this way before.

"But hey, we still have two weeks before I leave," he reminded her.

She sighed. "I know, I know…but still."

"No buts," he commanded. "Don't spoil our time now for what's to come. We'll handle that when we get there, alright?"

She smiled. Usually, she'd be the one forcing herself to feel better. But John simply being John already did that for her. "You're right."

John took both of her hands into his then went on to study her features. He was sure she had the most beautiful pair of eyes he's ever seen. He got sucked into them so easily; like he did so many times before, but the difference now is, she was looking back, too.

They were so into the moment, it took the barista a couple tries to get their attention. "John? Your drinks are ready."

"Oh, thank you!" John released one hand and handed over Alyssa's drink before taking his own. The two walked out, hand in hand.

Life could not get any better than this.

"Let's keep walking straight then turn on the second left," John directed. "I saw this nice spot on my drive back yesterday."

"Mm, sounds good," she said softly, her heart beating twice with every step. She couldn't believe how much her life had turned, for the good, ever since she started things with John. It'd only been three days, and that was enough to make her question how she'd ever gotten through without this. They felt so natural together. Now, the nine or ten years of friendship might've helped, but that doesn't change the fact that he's still the only guy who's ever made her feel like this. He's the only guy who's ever made her think that maybe, just maybe, love was in the cards for her after all.

John absent-mindedly placed their intertwined hands over his chest. Alyssa simply looked at him, this time, admiring much more than this dimples. He looked backed at her and smiled. "You're the only one I don't mind walking in silence with. We don't have to talk to make time worth it."

"No we don't," she agreed.

"The turn's coming up," he warned.

They walked in silence a little more, until they finally got to the spot. It was a nice little Japanese garden.

"It's so pretty!" Alyssa gasped.

"Yeah, almost as beautiful as you," he said sincerely. John caressed her hand as they walked through the trail. Flowers of every color surrounded them and up ahead was a small bridge suspended above a creek. He stopped once they got there, thankful the place was empty. It was just the two of them. He sandwiched her between himself and the railing, still holding onto her hand. "I wanted to thank you for the past few days."

She settled her drink on the railing, taking note of her new found vulnerability. Unlike anything in her past, she willingly embraced it. "Thank you, too, John."

He took one more sip of his drink before discarding it like she had. This freed his hands to place over her waist. He couldn't believe how tantalized he was by this simple contact. She single-handedly managed to make what once was banal to him be the most important aspect in his life. He's been with plenty of girls before, but no one's ever made him feel so free, as if he had everything he could ever want right in front of him.

The two continued on with the silence, their eyes lost in each other. They were so lost, in fact, they didn't realize their faces were drawing nearer and nearer. Then, at the moment of impact, their lips touched for the first time. It was electrifying. Their whole bodies were awakened, stimulating senses they never even knew existed. This feeling they had, for some reason, made them believe it was something that would last forever.

* * *

Alyssa was still thinking about the kiss later that evening. She'd spent all day with John, accompanying him on his usual routine before a show. Now she was alone in his locker room as he did his match. The 30-minute segment felt like the longest 30 minutes of her life.

"How the hell am I supposed to survive the 3 months," she sighed.

A knock on the door followed her rhetorical question. Before she got up, the door swung wide open. John, fresh from his match with no shirt on, appeared and so did Randy.

Alyssa had to do a double-take. "Randy?"

He walked in with John. "What are you doing here? I haven't seen you all day."

"Yeah, I know," she said simply.

"You've been hanging out with John an awful lot."

"Like I've been for years now?"

John, who had just closed the door, chuckled. "So how you been, Randy?"

Randy dithered over taking a seat on the chair. His today wasn't much better than yesterday. "Still shitty."

John put on a fresh shirt. "Have you talked to Sam?"

"No." He sat down.

"You should," Alyssa said. "Your marriage is obviously a problem, and you can't fix it without talking to the other person who's in it."

"I know, I know," Randy sighed. "Can we talk about something else?"

"Rands, we could, but you'll just be miserable for even longer. Why don't you do something about it?"

"I would if I knew what to do. What am I supposed to say to Sam? I don't love you like a husband should?"

Alyssa looked onto John for support.

"When did you start feeling this way?" he asked him.

Randy crossed his arms over his chest. "For awhile. I've been confused for years. I just stuck through it. I thought it was a phase after the honeymoon stage."

"Keep ignoring the problem then," Alyssa suggested.

The two men looked at her.

"Ignore the problem," she repeated. "But do talk to Sam and ask her on a date."

Randy raised his eyebrows. "I don't know about that…"

"Don't be so closed-minded, Randy. Go on a date with your wife and try to rekindle the flame."

Randy still looked skeptical.

"It's a good idea," John commented. "Why not? What could you lose?"

"I'll make you a deal," Alyssa said. "If you go on a date with Sam and actually try to remember why you married her in the first place, we'll go on that vacation you asked."

Randy's eyes had life in them for the first time.

"Come on, Rands. I'm not asking you to go on a date with the devil. It's your wife, for Christ's sake!"

Randy put up his hands and said, "okay, okay. I will. I'll call her tonight and coordinate."

Pleased, Alyssa got up and hugged her best friend. "Good boy!"

Randy, who was still seated, wrapped his arm around her tightly. "So Europe?"

"Europe."

John watched this embrace from across the room. He's seen it plenty of times before, but this one had him feeling uncomfortable. He couldn't deny the relief he felt as soon as Alyssa let go then turned to him.

"We gotta make sure this one actually goes through with the deal," she said, pointing at Randy.

He nodded. "Will do."

Randy got up and swung his arm over Alyssa's shoulders. "Well, I gotta get ready for my match. I'll see you guys later?"

"Okay," she said simply.

"I miss you guys," he said to both of them, but he was only looking at her.

"We miss you too," she smiled. "We'll see you later."

Randy exited the room, leaving John wanting to mention a few words.

"He's really, _really_ overprotective of you."

Alyssa laughed. "You just noticed?"

"Well no…I just…wonder."

Alyssa narrowed her eyes as she drew closer to John. "Wonder what?"

"How that's supposed to play out when Randy finds out about this."

Placing both of her palms on his chest, she said, "Well let me tell you, Randy can't do a damn thing."

John placed his hands over hers and smiled.

"Yeah, he always has to comment on everything I do, but he doesn't control me. Don't get that confused, Cena."

"Alright, alright, I wont." He smiled before leaning down to kiss her again.

By now, they'd lost count on which kiss this was, but neither of them were complaining.


	5. Who Needs Girlfriends?

**Thanks to therealchamps, hi14, pinayprincesa, PunknOrtonlover, and my time is now for the reviews! Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

Alyssa couldn't lie, she was getting a little frustrated with John.

She hid her feelings in a chuckle. "Why do you always do that?"

John raised his eyebrows. "Do what?"

"Pull away every time we make out."

John ran her words mentally in his head, and he was beginning to ask himself the same question. He had the most beautiful woman on his bed, the sexiest pair of legs wrapped around him, and the softest lips he's ever felt. Yet, for some reason, he managed to pull away from her again, and again, and_ again_. He was definitely guilty for those accusations, but like a stubborn criminal, he wasn't willing to confess just yet. "What are you talking about?"

Alyssa ignored his question and continued to stare in wonder. "Do you not wanna have sex with me or something?"

Completely caught off-guard, John was unable to follow through with an answer. He couldn't even utter a word.

She gladly picked up from there. "I mean, for a guy who willingly banged all the groupies and ring-rats that presented themselves to you, you seem pretty uninterested in any of that stuff with me."

"What? Hell no!" John's face expressed horror. "That's different! How can you even compare yourself to them? They…they were just for a good time."

Alyssa's facial expression didn't change. "So I'm not a good time?"

"That's not what I meant." John cursed himself at his inability to make her feel better. Still wrapped around her legs, he took both of her hands before continuing to say, "you're definitely a good time, but those girls were strictly _for_ a good time. It's all in the body with them, but with you, it's way more than that."

"Alright, I get it," she simply smiled.

Not sure if she completely meant it, he went on to say, "I just don't wanna fuck this up so…I'm going a little slow."

He seemed shy to admit that. This man who slammed bodies for a living had a soft spot and that soft spot was for her. She couldn't deny how sexy that was, and it did nothing to please her already racing libido.

But he was right about the slow pace. She didn't want to fuck this up, either.

John continued talking. "I-I can't even talk to you about my feelings and you expect me to physically show you?"

This forced a good laugh out of Alyssa. It was flattering. The same guy who wasted no time to bang groupies after shows was willing to wait. Sensing his nerves, she grabbed his face and began massaging it. "Relax, John. I get it. Just kiss me."

Without protest, he closed the space between them and met her lips again. They alternated between kisses involving tongue and kisses that were simple pecks. After all, that was all they could work with for now. With a less clouded judgment, Alyssa was able to stop before she knew John would want to pull away again.

"It's getting late."

"Yeah," he said softly.

"I should probably go."

"No, you shouldn't."

She found her bottom lip in between her teeth. This guy was driving her crazy, and he didn't even try. She was torn between wanting to spend as much time him and wanting _him_, all of him. But she couldn't have him now. She _shouldn't_ have him now. If she did, she'd have him just as easily as a groupie. Although he made it clear that she was incomparable to them, she still wasn't willing to put herself in the same division. Besides, she herself was still trying to process her feelings and her carnal wishes may just push her over the edge.

It was hard to react when she heard him say, "sleepover."

She knew he was asking for an innocent one, and she had no problem with that. Still, that one word took awhile to register. Once it did, she knew her answer immediately. To hell with her libido. She wouldn't mind suppressing it another night if it meant having him to wake up to.

"Okay, but can we just sleep now? You have a long day tomorrow."

John smiled. "Yeah, we can try, but I know how you are so just say something if you can't sleep. We'll watch TV, order food, or something."

She kissed him one more time and smiled. "I'd love that."

Their days, and now nights, together just kept getting better and better.

* * *

Randy's days, and now nights, just kept getting worse and worse. Last night, the same night he was supposed to ask his wife on a date, they'd gotten into an argument over the phone. The couple argued about postage stamps. Postage stamps! Sam mentioned they were running out, so he suggested she buy a pack from Costco. She went on to say she knew a better deal and that he would've known better if he was around more often. Then, he argued that she knew before they married that his job commanded most of his time and that she knew what she was getting herself into.

Problem was, he wasn't sure what he'd gotten himself into. He was happy for part of the marriage, a small fraction, but a part nonetheless. The other parts he spent pretending to be happy, pretending to be in love. He was fooled by the beautiful face and the good sex. There was only so much pretending a person could take. She'd proven time and time again that her presence was only toxic to his mood. She argued with him over the most trivial of things and showed no signs of concern for him. She complained about him being away often, but did she ever consider how it was for him? Did she ever think how hard it was to travel from city to city, to sleep from hotel room to hotel room, to be away from his own bed for days on end? She didn't have her husband home, but he didn't have a wife around either. She never considered that. She was too busy talking shit to him, she never considered any of it.

So, with no concern about the well-being of his marriage, Randy hung up on her last night and didn't contact her again.

It'd been over 24 hours since they last talked, but Randy didn't mind.

What he _did_ mind was the fact that he hadn't talked to Alyssa all day, either. He tried to get a hold of her during breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but she quickly dismissed him and said she was already busy.

Already busy? Since when did she get too busy for her best friend?

Randy sighed. This wasn't the first night he was spending alone, that was for sure. These nights of solitude were familiar to him now and had gotten even worse just recently. He itched to get a hold of Alyssa one more time, but he knew better not to. He couldn't handle another rejection.

So, desperate to escape his burdened thoughts, Randy immersed himself into the past. Alyssa was the last thing on his mind that night.

* * *

_Randy couldn't believe it. The worst day of his life somehow turned out to be the best. In his whole sixteen years of existence, he's never felt so alive. It was all thanks to one person. It was all thanks to his best friend._

_"Damn, I love you."_

_Alyssa looked at him proudly. "I love you too, Rands. I'm glad you're feeling better."_

_"How could I not feel better? Look at this!"_

_They eyed the city of Los Angeles, elevated 3,000 feet from the ground. They'd spent the last two hours hiking up a mountain and was now rewarded with this panoramic view. It was breathtaking. The city lights stretched on for miles, and Randy swore this was the second most beautiful thing he's ever seen. The first being right next to him._

_He looked at her and smiled once more. "That hike kicked my ass, but it was the best ass kicking of my life."_

_Alyssa laughed. "I knew you'd love it up here."_

_Randy took in a deep breath and was surprised a smile stayed on his face. "It's not just this, I loved getting up here with you. It made me feel small in a good way. I mean…there I was, sulking over the fact that my girlfriend cheated on me and dumped me. Then you brought me here and made me see how much more there is out there. Not to mention, this was one hell of a challenge. Weren't you worried I wouldn't have made it all the way up?"_

_Alyssa laughed. "I have to confess something, Rands. I was scared shitless to go up here."_

_He furrowed his eyebrows. "Then why'd you bring us here?"_

_"Because what better reason to get over my fear if it meant that it'd help you get over yours?"_

_Randy stared at her in amazement before swinging his arm over her shoulders. "You're the best, you know that?"_

_She giggled against him, her face comfortably buried into his chest._

_Randy took in another breath and admired the view._

_Who needs girlfriends when you have a best friend like that?_

* * *

A harsh stream of light hovered over the bed. Alyssa hated light as alarm clocks and was damned that the curtains had been left wide open. This morning didn't feel like a welcoming one, but the sight of John next to her quickly changed her mind. She smiled.

"You stare at people in their sleep often?" she teased him.

"No, I just stare at the ones I like," he answered softly. "Just you."

His voice was even sexier in the morning, she thought. She couldn't resist to kiss him right then and there, and he gladly welcomed it. John placed his hand behind her head, burying his fingers into her hair. The two fell into another one of their make-out sessions before a phone emitted sound. John raised his eyebrows, his lips still somewhat intact with hers.

"Silly! Have you never heard a phone before?"

John's eyebrows resumed its normal height. He frowned. "I don't like interruptions when I'm with you."

Alyssa chuckled before scooting towards the edge of the bed. She checked her phone and saw that she'd gotten a text. "It's Sam."

"She okay?"

"I…" Alyssa continued to read the message on her phone. "…don't think so."

She turned to John with a look he didn't like to see. He frowned, mirroring her own expression.

"She says that Randy's been ignoring her and that she doesn't know what to do anymore."

"I thought Randy was supposed to ask her on a date?"

"I guess that didn't go well," she shrugged, leaving her shoulders limp.

John didn't like the uneasiness in her demeanor. Like he'd said yesterday, she was too pretty to be doing that. The world was a much better place when she smiled. He caressed her cheek with his thumb and simply looked at her.

She pouted. "I gotta do some damage control."

"Go for it," he supported. "What do you have in mind?"

She rested her cheek on his hand before answering. "We needa physically get them together. Should we have dinner again? Us four? That way, we can mediate the crime scene."

John enjoyed the slightest bit of humor she infused. "Sounds good. Let's do it."

"Let's go! Let's go right now!"

Before John was able to protest, Alyssa pulled him out of bed.

"What? Right now?" All the blood drained out of John's face. His lips were left parted.

"Yes, right now." Alyssa straightened her hair in the mirror then looked at him. "Good thing we're still dressed from last night, huh?"

John couldn't even answer. He was still trying to get off the shock of being pulled away from the most comfortable morning he's ever had. He was in heaven on those sheets with her and now he was standing and on his way to see Randy? No offense, but Randy was the last person he wanted to see. The last person next to everyone else. John selfishly didn't want to see anyone. He just wanted Alyssa.

He stared at her as she interlaced their hands and led them outside.

It wasn't until they got to the elevator that he was able to speak up. "What are we doing exactly?"

"Waking up Randy."

A ping announced their arrival on the 14th floor. Randy's floor. As they stepped out, they immediately came to contact with him. Turns out, he was on his way down to the lobby.

Randy didn't look too happy. He was so immersed into his foul mood, he didn't notice John quickly unlace his hand from Alyssa.

"Randy-" she started to say, but he cut her off.

His voice was sharp.

"Is this why you've been ignoring me? You've been with this guy?" Randy didn't give them enough time to answer before he stepped around them and got into the elevator. He was shaking his head and mumbling words they couldn't understand.

Paralyzed, the two stayed put as the elevator doors closed behind them. The image of Randy's icy stare lingered in their minds long after he disappeared.

"What the hell?" John spoke out.

Alyssa brought her fingers to her bottom lip. "He's probably mad since I ignored him yesterday."

"So he refers to me as _this guy_? As if we've never even spoken to each other?" John's heard that tone of voice before and it was to the guys Randy vehemently tried to shoo away from Alyssa.

"I don't think you should take it personally," she said, without following through with good reasons.

An exasperated sigh escaped John's lips.

"He's…he's probably just mad at me for ignoring him, and he took it out on you. It's not you, John. He's just mad at the fact that I haven't been giving him time. Plus, he has a lot going on."

"Al, that doesn't give him a reason to be hostile towards me."

"I don't think he was being hostile towards you. He's just stressed out," she explained.

John ran a hand over his head and nodded. He didn't know what else to say. He's heard Alyssa make excuses for Randy's actions millions of times before. Whatever Randy did, wrong or right, she backed him up. John could only hope that it never work against him one day.

* * *

**Well? Thoughts on John and Randy? The flashback? Let me know in a review. I hope you all enjoyed that one! :) **


	6. Be With Me

**Shout out to Hi14, therealchamps, Lauren, my time is now, LexJameson, Franz and 1222mercedes1222 for the reviews! You guys are awesome! Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

_Randy couldn't believe it. This was the first night in two weeks that he was seeing his wife and they were arguing. They weren't in bed making love. They weren't in bed talking. They weren't in bed sleeping. As if they didn't argue enough, they were arguing right now. Hands in the air, veins popped out, pupils wide. Randy doesn't remember how it started, but he found himself in this exasperating cycle yet again. Sam was saying something about him never considering her feelings and him never putting effort in their marriage._

_Never considering her feelings? Never putting effort? He stared at his wife in disbelief. He hadn't slept the last 48 hours because all he's been doing was consider her feelings. Yeah, they haven't seen each other in two weeks but despite his busy schedule, he flew her out to be with him. He cancelled several appearances and denied sleep just to spend time with her. Now here she was yelling at him for not considering her feelings? For not putting effort? God, what did he have to do? He's doing the best he can, but when will that ever be good enough? When?_

_Randy shook his head and tried his best to drown out the words of his wife. Her mouth kept moving, but his mind was going dead. This was ridiculous. He tried walking towards the sliding door to the balcony, but she halted him. _

_She poked his chest and yelled some more. "See! See! You're not even gonna try and talk this out with me? You're just gonna walk away?"_

"_Sam, I need my space," he said, his lips pursed tightly. He was trying to stay calm, but his clenched jaw showed his struggle. _

"_You've had plenty of space!" She pushed her hands to his chest. _

"_Dammit, Sam! I don't wanna do this right now. I. Need. Some. Space."_

"_NO!" She pushed him again with a much harder force. She ended up collapsing onto his chest in sobs. Tears streamed down her face, soaking his shirt immediately. _

_He sighed. The only thing he thought to do was wrap his arm around her. "Sam, I really don't wanna fight with you right now."_

_Trying to hold back her sobs, she looked up at him. "We wont, then." _

"_Let's go to bed." He released his hold on her and took a step back. _

"_Okay," she said softly. She got on the bed then watched as he joined her. _

_The two laid there, close but not touching. They were immobile in more ways than one. _

_After several minutes of silence, Sam deflects their conversation in desperation to continue a talk with her husband. "Dinner tonight was good. That was the best steak I've ever had."_

_Randy, who was staring up at the ceiling, nodded. "Yeah and you don't usually like steak."_

_Sam's lips played a small grin. Randy was always good at remembering little things like that. She peeked over at him, unable to read his expression. She went on to talk some more. "The bar was kinda awkward though."_

_Sam let those words hang for awhile, but Randy didn't say anything. _

_Sam thought talking about other people's problems may bring them together so she went on to say, "__I thought Alyssa would've liked the guy I invited."_

_Randy's lips got stiffer. Out of all the things she could talk about, she talks about this? Not a good idea. _

"_She dismisses men so fast. It took her just a few minutes to turn her back on him! It's like she didn't give him a chance."_

"_She did. Chances don't have time minimums."_

_Sam ignored his comment. "I hope it's not awkward with him now."_

"_It shouldn't be," Randy said quietly. His whole body was becoming tense. He didn't want to be talking about this. Sam should've never even invited the guy. Alyssa doesn't need help getting set up with douche bags, assholes, or perverts. She's been burned several times. Men see a good girl and they try to fuck with her. Alyssa doesn't deserve that. Not ever again._

"_But it was interesting seeing her try to squirm away from the guy through John." Sam commented. Then, her eyes lit up. "Hey, you know what, John and her would make a good couple. Don't you think?"_

_Randy's never thought of that, but now that he did, the idea didn't settle well with him. Alyssa and John? No. No. No. He couldn't understand why, but he didn't like the sound of that. _

_To his misfortune, Sam kept going. "I mean, they naturally get along together and they seem to enjoy each other's company. Maybe they'll end up together." _

_Randy didn't say anything, forcing Sam to look up at him. _

"_Are you okay?" she asked._

"_Yeah, I need some fresh air. I'll be outside." _

_He quickly got up and went out before she had the chance to protest. He made his way down to the catering and low and behold, John and Alyssa were there. Together. _

_Randy still couldn't understand, but the way John looked at Alyssa somehow made his eyes roll with disgust._

* * *

Randy rolled his eyes with disgust as the elevator took him several stories down. So John's the reason Alyssa's been giving him the cold shoulder? That left a bad taste in his mouth. He remembered feeling like this just a few days ago when he'd caught them at the catering. Only this time, he was feeling worse. He still didn't understand, but the sight of them together did nothing but harm his already foul mood.

John and Alyssa? His best friend and his other best friend? Didn't John know better? Didn't he know not to go there? Randy's made it clear directly and indirectly that Alyssa didn't need to be with anybody. She's too good to be in a relationship. She's perfect the way she is, and Randy was sure a man would only change that. A relationship would just ruin her.

Leaning all his burdened weight against the wall, Randy began shaking his head profusely. He's never had an issue dealing with Alyssa's suitors but John? _John? _Maybe he was overreacting. Alyssa did mention yesterday that John and her have been hanging out for years. That's a fact. Maybe he just misses his best friend, and he mistakenly claimed John as the enemy. Yeah, that's definitely it. Stupid Sam just made a stupid comment. John and Alyssa could never be. If they could, it would've happened by now.

As the elevators doors slid open, Randy came to the conclusion that he simply missed Alyssa and it was making him do all these crazy things.

* * *

"Yeah, I was a little crazy this morning," Randy admitted to Alyssa. He'd asked her to meet him by his car in the parking lot.

"You _are_ crazy!" Alyssa spat, shaking her head. Her arms were crossed over her chest as she narrowed her eyes at her best friend.

"I'm sorry." He put up his hands in defense, innocence playing his eyes. "I was just grumpy from my fight with Sam last night."

"I know," Alyssa said. Her expression was hard to read. "Why do you think we tried to find you?"

He scratched the back of his head and shrugged. "I don't know, Al, I really don't know anything right now. But I am sorry for yelling this morning."

Alyssa uncrossed her arms. "Well, don't be sorry to me, I'm not the one you scolded."

Randy's head dropped. Yeah, yeah, yeah. John wasn't the person he wanted to talk about right now. But to please Alyssa, he simply nodded.

She crossed her arms again. "Well, I freed my whole schedule today. Did you wanna do something?"

Randy looked up and beamed. His smile reached his eyes, realizing this was his first real smile in days. "Of course, I've missed you."

"I wish I could say the same," she smirked.

His eyes widened. _Ouch. _

She didn't retract her statement but instead wrapped her arms around his torso. She laughed at his vulnerability. Men were always cute when their cheeks flushed from emasculation.

Randy gladly reciprocated by wrapping his arm around her. "Let's go on a hike."

She peeked a curious eye at him. "A hike? On this hot summer day? When later, you have to drag your sore ass to a house show?"

His eyes twinkled. "Yeah, because what better way to get over my fear if it means it'd help you get over yours?"

Remembering immediately where he'd gotten the line, Alyssa pulled away from their embrace and rolled her eyes. "That doesn't go, Orton. A hike's not gonna get me over any fear."

Randy shrugged, placing his right hand into his pockets. "Well, it'll help me get over my fear."

"Fear of what?"

"Of drifting away from you."

She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Randy actually possessed that fear? She opened her mouth again. "I don't understand."

Randy shyly placed his free hand behind his neck and shrugged. "I don't know…I just…I thought it'd be nice to do something we used to do. Hiking takes a few hours going up and down so…"

Alyssa smiled. This was cute. Her best friend wanted reassurance. "We better get dressed for it then. I'll meet you back here in twenty minutes?"

"Uh…" Randy chewed on this for a few seconds. He didn't want those twenty minutes away from her. "You know what, we'll stop by Sports Authority to buy our clothes. I need new ones anyway."

Alyssa beamed, showing no signs of disapproval. What girl would say no to an all-expense-paid shopping spree?

* * *

John couldn't believe how much disapproval his emotions had about being away from Alyssa. Not even a full day passed since their last contact, yet he was finding it unbearable to be without her. This woman was doing crazy things to him. She managed to make feeling alone feel even lonelier.

He sighed. Aside from missing her, he was also consumed by thoughts of Randy. He's the reason why Alyssa was absent from him right now. John found that easier to manage than the thought of Randy talking shit about him. Would he? John quickly pushed that idea away. Either way, it didn't matter. Alyssa reassured him that Randy can't do a damn thing. John hung onto those words like his life depended on it.

He was putting his on hat when he heard a knock at the door.

"Come in!" he yelled. He was more than happy to have company in his barren locker room. As soon as the door swung open, he realized this moment couldn't have been more bittersweet. In walked Alyssa and Randy. They were dressed in matching workout gear and appeared to be a little flushed from their previous activity. Whatever that was.

"Hey John!" Alyssa's eyes gleamed at the sight of him. His mere presence was enough to alleviate the stress in her body from the hike.

"Hey," he said softly, his eyes heavy on hers.

"Randy wanted to tell you something."

That quickly broke the spell.

A moment of struggle passed before the two men finally locked eyes.

Randy cleared his throat. "Sorry about this morning. You know how off I've been."

John took a second to look at Alyssa, who was intently looking at Randy, then returned his eyes back to the same man.

"I had tunnel vision this morning. I missed Alyssa and I guess I had to take that out on somebody. My bad."

John nodded his head. He wasn't sure how he felt about that apology. Randy barely looked at him. He changed the subject. "You feeling better now?"

"Of course. I got my dose of Alyssa today." Randy smiled. Pride was written all over his face.

"And now you have a match," she cut in.

"Yes, I do." Randy looked at her then returned his attention back to John, a proud look still on his face. "Well, we're gonna head to the gorilla now."

John didn't say anything. He watched Randy place his hand on Alyssa's elbow as he directed her out of the room. Her eyes were clouded, but he knew she didn't want to leave just as bad as he wanted her to say.

The two best friends were out of sight in a matter of seconds and John was immediately hit with a pang of jealousy. It was a feeling unfamiliar to him. He took his hat off then put it back on as he looked around his empty locker room. As if it wasn't bad earlier, he was feeling even lonelier now.

Meanwhile, Alyssa followed Randy to the gorilla. Once he got to his mark, he began stripping his workout gear off to expose his wrestling attire. They were black trunks that covered only what was needed.

He smirked at Alyssa, who'd done a great deal to look at anywhere but him. "Let's have a couple of drinks after this."

She finally looked at him. "You're not gonna stay for the whole show?" This was unusual, Alyssa thought.

"Nah, I don't need to."

She nodded, not having enough energy to defy him.

* * *

Alyssa groaned at her lack of energy. This day was long, unbearable in several aspects, and the last thing she wanted to do was have a 235 pound man resting all his weight on her. "Dammit, Randy. You said you knew your limit."

The inebriated man grumbled words hard to understand as he pushed more weight onto his best friend. He couldn't help it, he was as good as jelly. His right arm was draped around her shoulders as she struggled getting him to his room. A hallway had never looked so endless. Alyssa's breath became more ragged with each step. After her long over-haul of a marathon, they finally reached their destination. She slid his key card then opened the door.

Almost there and then you're free to go, she told herself. She needed this reminder for her last efforts to get him well-situated. She guided him onto his bed where he collapsed immediately. He sprawled on the mattress contently before he realized Alyssa was getting ready to exit.

Popping his head up as much as he could, he stopped her. "Al, don't leave."

She groaned inwardly and looked back at him. She just wanted to go back to her room and sleep.

"Please, Al," Randy pleaded. He slapped the bed as he scooted himself to one side.

She looked at the empty space he provided for her, sighing. Randy's bed will have to do for tonight. She walked towards it, exhaustion ready to claim her. She couldn't wait to sleep. She got on the bed and clasped her hands over her stomach. Her eyes began to close and suddenly, everything went black.

Time escaped her.

"Alyssa."

What? Was she dreaming? How long had she been sleeping?

"Alyssa."

She stirred, hearing the grumble inches away from her face. She turned and saw Randy dead asleep, but he mumbled her name again.

"Be with me," he added.

Alyssa's eyes widened. What the hell was her best friend saying? She continued to stare at him. His chest fell and rose steadily, but the things that came out of his mouth sounded absurd.

Be with me? As in what? She was with him right now, on his bed, like the several other times he'd gotten drunk.

Alyssa… _be with me?_

What did he even mean? Was it the alcohol that made him say that?

She took her sights away from him and stared up at the ceiling. This was getting uncomfortable. The whole day felt like a normal Alyssa and Randy day, but there sporadic times when things felt… _weird_. Those moments were becoming even clearer now. She mentally ran through the several times she felt uneasy under Randy's gaze. The way he looked at her today was different.

And the way he was acting around John? It felt like a competition. What was that about? These odd instances were stacking up and for the first time, she couldn't comprehend her best friend. What was happening to him?

She looked at him once more. His face was more familiar than the back of her own hand. Yet, it wasn't the face she wanted to see. Without second thought, she got herself up and walked out of the room. Randy was fast asleep, he didn't need her anymore.

Besides, what- or rather, who _she_ needed was John. She led herself to his room, but the walk felt like another marathon.

At least I'll be able to see him after this, she thought. She kept walking and by the time she knew it, she was in front of his door. She knocked without hesitation. A few seconds passed, but no one answered. Then she knocked again. And again. Still no answer. _Fuck. _She placed her forearm over her eyes and leaned against the door.

To her surprise, the door swung open, knocking her off balance. The receiver was just as surprised.

Luckily, John caught her. He held her up by her shoulders. "Alyssa! Are you okay?"

She looked up at him. "I am, now."

He wrapped both arms around her, fully enclosing her body into his embrace. "You don't look so good."

"I'm tired as fuck," she mumbled against him. "It's been a long day. And I miss you. And I'm sorry for waking you up."

John ran his hand gently over her hair and chuckled. "Don't worry about it, baby. I missed you too."

He kissed her temple before releasing her. "You should go to bed, you're tired."

"You gonna sleep with me?" she asked him.

"Of course."

He guided her into the room after closing the door behind him. She climbed on the bed and before John was able to settle himself beside her, she was fast asleep.

He smiled and kissed her. "Goodnight, beautiful."

* * *

**Feedback would be greatly appreciated(:**


	7. Hall of Shame I

**Thanks for the feedback Hi14, therealchamps, my time is now, LexJameson, 1222mercedes1222, and Cena's baby doll! Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

Alyssa straightened out her red dress while looking at herself in the mirror. It was a floor-length silk with an open back. It clung to all the right places in her body, but she still wasn't satisfied. It was that time of the month, and she felt anything but beautiful. Yet, she had this nagging thought that tonight, she had to look her absolute best. John, the face of the WWE, had asked her to be his date for the Hall of Fame. Not only will there be superstars from several generations, but it will also be a televised event. John's high profile in the business only heightened her worries. What would people think when they see her next to him? She wasn't ashamed of herself, but that didn't automatically make her feel worthy of being his plus one. The wives of some superstars weren't even going, but she was? Her nerves were impossible to tame.

Luckily, Randy invited Sam. Alyssa practically tackled him when he told her the news. It'd been nearly two weeks since his drunken escapade, where she felt forced to leave the room out of discomfort when he mumbled her name. Somehow, shortly after that, Randy and Sam began to be okay again. Sam complained a little less and Randy became less moody.

Alyssa and John's relationship blossomed even more the last fourteen days. They spent every waking and sleeping moment together. They agreed to continue keeping it a secret for now. It's not like they had an official title, anyway. They were simply two people spending _a lot _of time getting to know each other. Inside and out. No one needed to be informed.

Despite their growing connection, Alyssa was still flustered when he'd ask her to be his date for the Hall of Fame. She began packing her clutch to distract herself from the mirror. She didn't want to look at herself anymore. It wouldn't help. She felt her palms get clammy and she nearly jumped when a knock came at the door. _Geez, why was she so nervous? _

She answered the door and saw John, causing all the tension in her body to disappear. Who wouldn't melt at the sight of this man? He was looking more handsome than ever, dressed in a black fitted suit and a black tie. His smile was even better to look at.

"You're gorgeous," he told her. He couldn't decide where to look. She was the epitome of perfection. His eyes danced and finally settled on her face, framed by the soft waves of her hair.

He took her hand and kissed it, causing crimson to wash her cheeks. It was a good thing she didn't use a heavy hand on the blush today. "You're not so bad yourself, Cena."

He nodded, keeping the smile on his face. It was impossible not to have this reaction around her. "It's my pleasure to have you as my date, Alyssa. Are you ready to go?"

"Yes, I am." With her clutch secured in one hand, she linked her free arm around his as they made their way towards the elevator. "Just take me before I run away."

John pushed the down button. "Run away?"

She let out a heavy breath. "I'm a bit nervous."

"You? Nervous?" John raised his eyebrows. He was standing tantalizingly close.

She bit her lip.

"Baby, you have nothing to be nervous about."

A _ping_ announced the arrival of an empty elevator and they both walked in.

"I just hope I don't trip and embarrass you." She peeked at her shoes and they seemed even taller than when she first put them on. They were 6-inch black suede pumps.

"If anyone's embarrassing anyone, it's me embarrassing you. I mean-" John took a slight step to the side to allow himself a better view of her. "-look at you! You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

She blushed some more, feeling John tighten his hold on her.

"Just don't tell my mom I said that," he winked before returning his proximity.

The elevator doors opened up, causing Alyssa's heart to hammer away even faster. She stole a glance at the man beside her and somehow, that got her heart lax.

"Don't be surprised if all I do is stare at you tonight," she mumbled.

"Oh trust me, I'll be looking back." John beamed.

They walked through a large crowd in the lobby, but their attention remained on each other.

Alyssa denied his statement. "But not when you have to take pictures. I'll stand by Sam when you guys walk through the carpet."

"But you're my date." John guided her through the revolving doors. "Stand by me. You'll make the pictures even better."

Before she could respond, Randy and Sam hollered their names. They were standing by the sidewalk, signaling them over to the limousine.

"Sam!" Alyssa left John's side to hug her best friend's wife. She was wearing a silver floor length gown, with her brown hair in an up-do. "You look gorgeous!"

"Look who's talking! You're a dynamite!" Sam stood back to ooh and ahh over Alyssa. Her husband right beside her was doing the same.

"Yeah, I got quite the date." John stated proudly. He placed his arm around her waist.

"Oh stop, you guys! Everyone looks great. Shall we go in now?"

Everyone nodded then made their way into the ride. Once they were all settled, John draped his arm around Alyssa and settled his hand behind her lower back. She smiled at him, seemingly nervous. He wasn't sure if it was because of his first public display of affection or because of the ceremony they were heading to. Either way, he was thrilled to have her as his date. It was an excuse to have her by his side in front of the whole world.

"You guys look good," Sam commented. Her eyes were feasting at the opposing duo.

John smiled. "Thank you."

"Together, I mean."

Randy, who still hadn't spoken a word, cleared his throat. Alyssa was too busy blushing to notice.

John, however, picked up on his silence. "You alright there, Randy? You haven't said a thing."

"Yeah, I'm just tired. Barely got any sleep last night."

Sam beamed. The mention of last night brought red to her cheeks. "Yeah, we're running on two hours."

Alyssa smiled in approval, quickly picking up on the inference. Randy's muteness didn't appear to be out of foulness this time, but as he said, out of fatigue. Good fatigue. The kind only your loving partner should inflict. "I assume you guys had a good night anyway?"

Memory forced a sadistic grin to Randy's lips. He grabbed Sam's hand and nodded. "Yes. Yes, we did."

Whatever worries Alyssa had were alleviated as the atmosphere in the car continued to improve. The ice was broken and the four of them felt normal again. She looked between John, Randy and Sam, seemingly all on friendly terms. They conversed, laughed, and joked. What more could Alyssa ask for? She continued to enjoy herself on the ride. Then, the car stopped and the door opened a few seconds after. They were here.

Alyssa felt her breath catch, and John noticed. He looked at her comfortingly as Randy and Sam took their exit.

"You okay?" he asked her. They were alone momentarily.

"Yeah," she smiled. It was half-forced, but it was a smile nonetheless.

Then, to her surprise, John kissed her. It wasn't just a small kiss, either. It was full of passion, sending a surge of blood to pump through her veins. She felt like she'd touched a live wire. Randy or Sam could've seen this, but John, oh John, he was so tantalizing, it didn't matter.

She cupped his cheek and smiled. "Thank you. I needed that."

He winked at her. "No problem. You have nothing to worry about. Let's go."

She followed him out of the car and was met by a sea of people. Fans, held back by railings, filled the space. There were reporters, photographers, and superstars on the walkway. There was so much noise, it was hard for Alyssa to think. She stole a glance at John before taking a deep breath. He looked at her too, and together, they walked the carpet. They were stopped several times for photos and comments. John didn't take his arm off of her for one second. In fact, he was more attentive of her despite all the people that wanted his attention.

Why were they hiding their budding romance again? This was fun.

Alyssa looked over and saw Randy intently gazing at them. _Oh. _That's partially why. Her best friend was quite the over-protector and she didn't want him to pry in before anything started. Granted, a lot has started for her and John, but she wanted to keep it to herself a little longer. It was special. Besides, John was adamant about being on the down low, too. This mutual agreement was working for them, so why change it? For now, outsiders could see them as good friends and nothing more.

After several minutes, they finally made it into the auditorium. The place was massive. Walls were stretched up so high, the ceiling felt like a mile away.

"It's a nice place, huh?" John admired the venue with her.

"Nice doesn't even cover it," Alyssa mumbled as her eyes continued to dance. Muted colored lights bounced all over the walls while nude curtains framed the stage.

John took a few more seconds to look around before finally settling his eyes on his favorite view: Alyssa. "Let's find our seats?"

She smiled and nodded.

The two made their way towards the front, passing by thousands of seats. Some were occupied, and some were not. They got to the front row and saw their names in the center. Alyssa looked at John reluctantly. She knew this was where the camera would pan most often.

"Don't worry, baby. I'll be right next to you."

He guided her towards their seats and when they got there, Alyssa realized Sam and Randy were assigned to sit beside them. Thank goodness. Her and John sat down, taking the time to admire the stage.

Randy's voice emerged a couple seconds later, forcing Alyssa to look his way. He was holding hands with Sam, a big smile plastered on his face. He was talking to a woman with brown hair. She looked out of place in her short pink mini. Alyssa continued to stare as Randy gave the brunette a hug. Then, the married couple made their way towards them.

"You won't believe who I just saw," Randy said.

John and Alyssa looked at him intently.

"Who?" John finally asked.

"Your ex-girlfriend."

The words took awhile to register.

Then, all the blood drained from Alyssa's face. John's ex-girlfriend? But before her, he said his career made it difficult to date. This didn't make sense.

John appeared to be caught off-guard, too. He didn't say a word. His eyes looked around nervously, trying to see who the hell Randy was talking about.

"Mickie James is here," Randy announced. "I guess firing her didn't keep the WWE board from inviting her to this event."

"Oh," was all John could say. His head dropped.

Randy shrugged nonchalantly as he took his seat in between Sam and Alyssa. He clasped his wife's hand, oblivious to what a momentous revelation he just made.

Alyssa stared off in space as she tried to wrap her head around what she just heard. John has an ex-girlfriend from the WWE? Why is this the first time she's hearing about this? Maybe they dated before her and John met. But that would've been over ten years ago. John wasn't even in the WWE ten years ago. She struggled to find a logical answer. Her mind was going haywire.

John touched her arm, brining her right back to earth. She hadn't realized she wasn't breathing.

"Are you okay?" he asked her.

She looked at him. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because of Mickie James," he whispered closely to her ear.

"What about her?" she asked, unsure if she even wanted to know.

"You must be shocked to find out I have an ex from the WWE."

Alyssa looked straight ahead, her lips formed into a hyphen. Damn right she's shocked. But is this something to worry about? Ex means she's in the past. Surely, this doesn't change anything about the present. Right?

John continued to whisper. "Look, I should've told you, but Mickie and I agreed to keep it a secret-"

Alyssa's head snapped, forcing John to stop mid-sentence. Her eyes pierced into him.

_We agreed to keep it a secret. _

God, why did that sound disgustingly familiar? John and Mickie agreed to keep it a secret, just like her and John? How many times has he done this before?

Alyssa looked away. It felt like the floor had been pulled from under her. She had spent the last several days giving away a part of herself she _never_ gave to anyone, but she willingly gave it to John. Now she learns that he couldn't even tell her the truth about his past? He deliberately omitted facts. He never corrected her when she'd mention him never having a girlfriend from the WWE.

"Alyssa…talk to me," John urged. "Do you wanna go outside? The ceremony isn't starting for another ten minutes."

He seemed so adamant to talk now that he'd gotten caught.

She shook her head. "John, this isn't the place nor the time."

And frankly, she wasn't sure if she could handle hearing any more right now. The past has passed, but as Alyssa looked over at John, she couldn't deny the guilt in his eyes and that terrified her.

_Damn. _No wonder she'd been nervous about tonight.


	8. Hall of Shame II

**Special thanks for those who took the time to review! Shout outs to LexJameson, Pinayprincesa, my time is now, 1222mercedes1222, crimsonsky123, Hi14, Cena's baby doll, and therealchamps. Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

John cursed himself. Alyssa hadn't looked his way at all during the ceremony; not even during the ten times or so he'd looked at her to _maybe_ get her attention. Normally, this wouldn't have worried him except he remembered her saying to not be surprised if all she does is stare at him tonight. She seemed to be doing anything but that. What was going on in her head? He desperately wanted to know. There was obvious distance between them, tension even. It was an unfamiliar feeling for him considering he's been above cloud nine with her the last two weeks.

Damn Mickie for being here tonight. Damn Randy for bringing it up. And most of all, damn him for not telling Alyssa sooner.

He remembered her asking just two nights ago why he never dated a diva. He told her that simply, none of them caught his interest. That wasn't a lie. He learns now that he should've corrected her and admitted he has, in fact, dated a diva. Now he's in this hole, and he wasn't sure when he'd get the chance to dig himself out. He just wanted to get it over with. He just wanted Alyssa to be okay again.

Clapping from all over the room snapped him back to reality. He looked around and saw Alyssa clapping as well. Her eyes glistened towards the stage. She seemed genuinely interested in what was going on over there. The speeches and inductions were interesting and historic indeed, but his mind was elsewhere.

To his surprise, Alyssa leaned towards him. His whole body got hot.

"You really should start clapping when everyone else is, John. You don't want pictures of you looking bored."

He gazed at her and saw a hint of smile in her eyes. Maybe she's okay, after all. So, doing as told, John began clapping and tried his best to focus on what was happening in front of him.

* * *

Finally, the ceremony ended. Everyone was gradually making their way towards the exit. John saw the people beside him, including Alyssa, upright so he stood up, too. He opened his mouth to say something, but she beat him to it.

"Sam needs to go to the bathroom and I wanna freshen up. We'll be right back."

He closed his lips as he watched her walk away. Guess he'll have to wait a little longer to talk to her. Fortunately, a spew of wrestlers huddled around him and started saying hello. John gladly welcomed the small talk. He could use the distraction. A few minutes passed and the people around him were beginning to disperse. He looked around to see if Alyssa and Sam were back, but before he found them, someone tapped his shoulder from behind.

Out of all people, it was Mickie James. Of course. What an unpleasant surprise.

"Hey, John!" She wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Hey." He lightly tapped her shoulder before scooting back.

"Long time no talk!"

"Yep."

"How have you been?" She leaned back in.

"Good, I've been good." He stepped back some more.

"So… are you single?"

"Uh…" John's eyes locked.

"He is," Randy answered for him. He'd joined their circle.

John glared at him. What the hell was he doing?

"Oh, so you haven't found someone else, huh?" Mickie bit her lip. She hadn't taken her eyes off John.

John opened his mouth but no words came out. He did find someone, but that's none of her business. When is this girl gonna leave?

"I haven't found someone else, either."

"You should," John said indignantly.

Randy stifled a laugh. "You two haven't changed. Mickie's still as easy, and John's still playing hard to get."

"Oh yes. John's quite hard, I remember. I had fun with that," Mickie smirked at her inside joke. She batted her lashes, and it made John want to vomit. She's nothing compared to Alyssa.

"And I don't think John wants you," Randy laughed some more.

Finally! Randy was back on his side.

Mickie glared. "Oh shut up, Orton. What do you know?"

Another female's voice followed the question. "Hey."

It was Alyssa. John felt a sense of relief wash over him; thankful she hadn't backed down from Mickie's presence. He smiled and gladly wrapped an arm around her waist. "Hey, I'm glad to have my beautiful date back."

If Alyssa noticed Mickie was there, she didn't show it. She smiled up at John. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah, I've been." He took his eyes off Alyssa momentarily. "If you excuse us, we're gonna go now."

Sam, who was beside Randy, nodded. "We'll follow you after we talk to Bob Jr."

John smiled at the mention of Randy's dad. "Sounds good, we'll be in the limo."

Alyssa's eyes traveled as she turned on her heel. In a stolen second, she locked eyes with Mickie. It only made her walk away faster.

"Thank you," John said to Alyssa once everyone else was out of earshot.

"For?"

"For getting me outta there. I didn't even wanna talk to her." John tried to keep up with her pace. She was walking awfully fast for a woman in six inch heels.

Alyssa smirked. "Cena's not friendly with his exes, I see."

John stopped and grabbed her arm.

She looked at his grip quizzically, then at him.

"Alyssa, it's not what you think-"

"You don't even know what I think," she challenged him. "And like I said earlier, this isn't the place nor the time. Can we just go back to the limo?"

John let her words hang for a few seconds. How could he get her to give him a chance to explain? It'd save them both from brewing trouble. Then again, if he hadn't lied, they wouldn't be here.

"Alright," he succumbed.

"Thank you," she said.

He watched her walk away before following her. He was definitely not used to this. Usually, he knew what was going on in her head, at times even before she knew, but right now, he had no clue. She was acting weird, but who could blame her? She'd caught the only man she ever gave a chance in a lie.

John tailed her into the limo. He looked at her, but her face was fixed towards the window. His eyes trailed to her hand, and he itched so bad to touch it. Before he could act on his wish, Randy and Sam joined them inside.

"Hey, you guys wanted to go to the after party, too, right?" Sam asked.

"Yes!" Alyssa answered immediately.

It startled John. He frowned. How come she couldn't give him that reaction when he was talking to her? Oh, right. Sam wasn't a deemed liar. Alyssa looked at him momentarily before returning to the glass. Could she stop doing that? Please? It was such a tease. She'd act so distant, warm for one second, then distant again.

Immediately, John's mind started drifting to last night. It was a much more pleasant thing to think about. Alyssa and him had snuggled in the balcony for hours just talking. She told him about her childhood and how much of a tomboy she was. Turns out, she was the only girl amongst all her cousins. No wonder her and Randy had gotten along so well and so early in life. She was one of the boys. Then, John told her about his life after high school and how he moved to California with nearly nothing. She said that was a gutsy move, and he agreed. Then, she said that liking him was the gutsiest thing she's ever done.

Their ride came to a halt, forcing John back into the present. He looked at the woman beside him, and she was getting ready to head out the door. Damn. When is she going to talk to him? This was driving him crazy. He dragged himself out of the limo and anticipated Alyssa's next move.

She turned to him and said, "I'll be with the girls tonight."

His lips set a straight line.

"Is that okay?" she asked, surprisingly.

He tucked some loose hair behind her ear and forced himself to nod. "If that's what you want. Are you okay?"

She nodded.

He glanced around quickly and saw everyone distracted. Nobody was paying attention to them. He leaned in and kissed her.

She gasped.

He looked at her wearingly and said, "I wanna see you after, though. I miss you."

"I've been beside you all night."

"Physically, yes."

She traveled her eyes, as if looking at John was such a hard thing to do. It kind of was. "Okay. I'll see you later. Have fun tonight."

He watched as she walked away from him. She was getting smaller and smaller and by the time he knew it, she disappeared into the crowd. He stood there for awhile just staring. He just wanted to talk to her. He just wanted to set everything straight. She obviously had something on her mind but was having trouble talking about it. How could he make that trouble go away?

"Ay, John! You coming in?" Randy asked him from afar.

"Yeah," he answered, feeling forced out of his thoughts.

The two men got inside and John couldn't help but look around for Alyssa. It wasn't hard to find her at all, she was at the bar holding two drinks with both hands.

_Oh boy._

* * *

Usually, Alyssa would have a drink or two, and that was it. Tonight was a different story. John was sure she was past her fifth glass, and she looked to be after for more. He was eyeing her from the bar with his own drink when Randy went and sat beside him.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Wsup?"

"Let's go outside!" Randy suggested. "It's too loud and stuffy in here."

John looked at Alyssa once more. She was surrounded by divas, as well as Sam, so he felt assured that she'd be fine. He followed Randy out of the club. Fresh air hit his face as soon as the door opened.

"Damn, it feels so good out here," Randy said.

"Yeah," John agreed. He cut to the chase. "What's your question?"

"I'll ask you plain and simple. Is there something going on with you and Alyssa?"

John's mouth went dry. He suddenly wished he'd been drinking as much as her. Or more.

Randy continued. "I mean…I'd think you two would tell me, but I can't be sure. You guys have been spending a lot of alone time together lately."

John swallowed the lump in his throat. How the hell was he supposed to respond to this? He's still conflicted about Alyssa's muteness with him tonight, she's drunk right now, and they'd agreed to keep their relationship a secret. If he confesses to Randy now, Alyssa may just have another thing against him.

So, he lied. "No. Nothing's going on with me and her."

Randy studied his face. "What about all that touchy stuff earlier today?"

John shrugged. "She's my date."

"And nothing more?"

"Nothing more," John said through his teeth.

Randy gave this a thought. "Hm. Alright. Do you know what's going on with her?"

I wish, John thought. "What do you mean?"

"Well, she's usually the one scoffing me about my drinking limit, but she's acting like she doesn't even have one tonight."

This was unsettlingly true. John noticed that, too.

"Something's wrong."

And I wish she'd talk to me about it so I could make her okay, John thought. "Well, she hasn't said anything that'd make me think something was wrong."

"But she's _acting_ like something's wrong." Randy's best friend instincts were kicking in. He held John's gaze for a few seconds. "Trust me, I know her. Something's wrong."

And I know her too, John thought. "We'll just have to watch over her tonight."

"Yeah, let's go back inside."

The two men went in, missing the fresh air immediately. But they had Alyssa to tend to. They fumbled through crowds of people. Their eyes frantically searched the scene since their feet only moved as fast as the crowd allowed them. They got to the bar, but she wasn't there anymore. They searched through several known booths, but she wasn't in any of them.

"Where the hell could she have gone in that time we left." Randy scratched his head. He looked around and saw only faces that were unfamiliar to him.

"She might be in the ladies room," John suggested.

Randy nodded and made his way towards the restrooms. Then, he looked up and stopped dead on his tracks. Alyssa was parading around on top of the bar.

"ALYSSA!"

He ran towards her, not caring if he bumped into anyone. He was at her feet within seconds.

"Get your ass down!"

She smiled deviously at him then raised her glass. She tilted her head from side to side as if she were taunting him. "Leave me alone, Randy!"

"Alyssa!" he gritted through his teeth.

Ignoring him, she walked along the bar then started swaying her hips. She brought herself lower and lower, exposing more leg through the slit of her dress. She was practically humping air.

John got to the scene just as Randy lunged over and grabbed Alyssa's hands.

Shocked, she loosened her grip, instantly sending the glass she was holding to the ground. It shattered.

"Oh no! Ooops!" she gasped.

Randy shook his head condescendingly. That glass was the least of his worries. He swooped his arm around her back and got her to the floor. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Having some fun!" She stuck her tongue out at him. "Calm your penis!"

"No, _you_ calm your ass, Alyssa!" Randy was fuming. He knew she would regret this in the morning. Alyssa was never the type to make this kind of scene, most especially at an event like this. They were at a club, but it's a club filled with several generations of people she worked with- people she looked up to. They weren't here to get drunk and lose control. It was for a little buzz, a little celebration, and _not_ for a show like the one she was giving.

What the hell has gotten into her?

"Geez weez Rands! You're bad at fun!"

Randy watched his best friend try to push him away, but she was barely even touching him. The alcohol had taken away her sense of depth. And more. Alyssa began swaying her hips again. Leaning forward with her back out, she tapped her ass against the bar and started going moving up and down. Her eyes were closed.

"Jesus Christ, Alyssa." Randy didn't hesitate to swing her body over her shoulders. He'd seen enough.

"Raaaaandddyyyyyyyy!" Alyssa groaned. Her head swayed from side to side as Randy managed their way through the crowd. It was making her dizzy. Really, really dizzy.

As soon as he set down outside, she lurched forward and vomited.

"Oh, fuck," Randy mumbled. He leaned over her and created a make-shift hair tie with his hand. He watched as she spewed vile onto the sidewalk. "You're gonna be thankful for this in the morning."

"Eughhhhhh!" Alyssa growled. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and was tempted to sit down.

When Randy saw what she was trying to do, he held her up. "Don't sit, just lean on me." He pulled her to her jelly feet expecting her to finally cooperate.

She didn't. She tried pushing him away again and was more successful this time.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked her. She responded with another jab, forcing an exasperated sigh to escape his lips. He looked around and saw John staring blankly at them. He looked utterly lost.

"Randssss!" Alyssa whined, making Randy return his sights on her. She slammed her hand on his chest again. "I've never done this before, I'm scared!"

"Don't worry, it's just alcohol," Randy placated.

"I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared," she repeated it like a mantra.

Randy wrapped both arms around her. "You'll be fine, I'm not gonna let anything happen to you."

Watching this, John unconsciously made a fist with both hands. He'd do anything to be Randy right now. Why wasn't he the one holding her?

Alyssa was muffling against her best friend then suddenly, she began sobbing.

Helpless, John closed his eyes, feeling pain down to his core. He couldn't see this. His heart was ripping in half. Not only was another man holding her, but he knew what she was talking about. He knew what she was crying about. It had nothing to do with alcohol and everything to do with him. Alyssa's voice echoed in his head. She'd told him this just last night: _this, us, you- you scare the hell out of me, John, but I like you, so it's okay. _

But this is not okay. This is definitely not okay.

Alyssa never cries. Alyssa never gets drunk. Alyssa never hesitates speak up. But somehow, she's done all of that tonight. She's managed to go over lines she would've never even gotten close to.

"John, can you get Sam for me? I wanna take Al back to the hotel," Randy said.

John opened his eyes. He could only nod, as he forced himself to walk away. That whole scene was like a car crash. He didn't want to see what was happening, but he couldn't look away. It was heart-shattering and numbing all at the same time.

His walk to find Sam was like an out of body experience. He felt himself moving, but his mind went blank. There was nothing. It's as if his senses had been taken away from him. He couldn't hear a thing, couldn't feel anything, couldn't make out what he was seeing. Thankfully, his search wasn't hard at all. Sam found him instead.

"Randy and Alyssa are outside," he announced. He was surprised he'd managed to get that out.

"Is everything okay?"

He shrugged.

"Let's go!" She hustled them out of the club.

The other two weren't where John had seen them last.

"They're probably in the limo already." Sam kept walking along the sidewalk, where she soon found Randy standing in front of an open car door. "Baby! What's going on?"

"Alyssa's blacked out, but she'll be fine. Are you guys ready to go?"

"Yeah, lets go." Sam said as her husband guided her inside. "Poor Alyssa."

John mutely followed their path. He sat on the empty space beside his drunken date. She was leaning on her side, with her arm draped over her chest. Even at this state, she looked absolutely beautiful. But she looked broken, too.

John closed his eyes, feeling a flood of unsettling emotions rushing back in. Question after question kept tormenting his shattered state. Why did he have to lie? Why didn't she let him explain? Why didn't he try harder _to_ explain? Why did tonight have to succumb to this? It could've been avoided. Was this why Randy's been so overprotective? Did he know how vulnerable she was and didn't want her to end up this way? John couldn't blame him. He just wanted to go back to last night when they were safe in each other's arms.

John opened his eyes and looked at her again. He's never seen her like this. She looked so raw. Her delicate features were replaced by emotion and intensity; not even sleep camouflaged that. She's never acted this way, but then again, she's always been good at avoiding trouble- good at avoiding men.

Her voice kept echoing in his head and it sent heavy blows to his heart. _I've never done this before. _

John was only beginning to assimilate the meaning of that. He hoped, with everything that he had, that it wasn't too late.


	9. You Need to Talk to Me

**For those who reviewed- Hi14, ****1222mercedes1222, ****Pinayprincesa,** my time is now, **therealchamps, Lauren, and **Cena's baby doll- thank you for your support! Enjoy everyone!

* * *

_Oh, fuck. _Alyssa's head was throbbing even before she opened her eyes. This could not be good.

She raised her eyelids slowly and was relieved when her pupils came to no contact with light. The curtains were closed, thank goodness.

"Mmmm," she moaned. She got on her elbows and looked around. There was absolutely no memory of how she got here or of anything else from last night. She helplessly crashed her head back on the pillow and sighed. "I could stay here all day."

She closed her eyes momentarily and dreamed of someone knocking on her door. The knocking became relentless. She opened her eyes and groaned after realizing it wasn't a dream.

"You seriously makin' me get up?" she scoffed at her unknown and unwanted knocker.

The knocking didn't stop.

"Fuckin' shit." She bitterly pulled out of bed and sluggishly dragged herself towards the door. She opened it.

"Alyssa!"

A pair of startling arms were wrapped around her in a split second. It didn't process until after she pulled away. She blinked. "Nice to see you, too, John."

His face fell. _Oh. _She probably doesn't remember last night.

"I'm sorry for barging in. I've been up all night, and I couldn't wait to see you. Are you okay?"

"Well…I have a fatass hangover."

He frowned. "Other than that, are you okay?"

"Yeah?" She blinked.

And so did he.

"John, I don't mind you standing there, but are you gonna come in or not? I wanna go back to bed." She was beginning to feel herself drift.

"I'll come in," he replied softly.

She nodded her head in approval then turned on her heel. He closed the door behind them and watched as she got on the bed.

"Never again," she mumbled softly. "Alcohol is not worth it."

When she heard no follow-up statement from John, she eyed him curiously. He wasn't the one with the hangover, but he looked even worse than her.

"Are _you_ okay?"

"I don't know," he answered honestly. He's been wanting to talk to her for so long, but now that she was here, he couldn't bring himself to it. She seemed so oblivious to the depths of what transpired just a few hours ago. He didn't want to ruin her morning like he ruined her last night.

Alyssa furrowed her eyebrows. "Why aren't you okay?"

"Do you even remember last night?"

She shook her head nonchalantly. "Not really."

"What's the last thing you remember?"

Then suddenly, it hit her. Mickie James, John's ex-girlfriend. She frowned. "John, this is too heavy for breakfast."

"Do you wanna get something to eat?" he asked out of his will. Her not wanting to talk was starting to wear him out thin, but he was helpless.

"Please?" She smiled sweetly.

Of course, John couldn't deny her. He offered his hand to help her up and off they went for food.

* * *

"I've never been so happy to eat. That meal was so good to me," Alyssa fancied as she got back into the elevator. John and her had just finished eating, and they were on their way back to her room. She burped.

John laughed casually. The atmosphere between them had been casual all morning- kind of like the way things were before they started dating. His eyes buckled at the thought of them going back to being just friends. He dismissed that thought as quickly as it went.

"I just wanna be lazy today," Alyssa said.

"I'll be lazy with you."

"Sounds good. You should be resting anyway. You're leaving in two days."

_Oh, fuck. _John hadn't thought about Australia. He couldn't bare the thought right now; he had other things to do before then. For one, talk to Alyssa. He grabbed his opportunity once they got to her room.

"Can you tell me now?" he asked her.

"Tell you what?" She sat against the headboard and looked up at him wonderingly.

"What you remember from last night."

She almost wanted to roll her eyes. Why was he so heavy on this topic? "Are you gonna join me in bed?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes."

John didn't take his eyes off Alyssa as he hopped on. He sat facing her with his feet parallel to the headboard.

"Tell me."

"So damn eager," she teased. A playful smile was on her face.

John frowned. She's obviously not too serious about this, but he was. He wanted to finally set things straight. "Alyssa."

"What, John?" her expression changed. "Why is last night so important?"

"Because-"

"Mickie James." She let that name play her lips again. "Mickie James. Is that who you wanna talk about? Because I don't."

John opened his mouth, but he couldn't muster up a response. How'd she go from playful to intimidating? He waited awhile before he asked a question. "Why not?"

"I just don't want to."

"So you're okay?"

"Okay as in?"

"Okay about her as my ex-girlfriend."

Alyssa closed her eyes. She didn't expect hearing this to have so much effect on her. John's ex-girlfriend: the girl he used to sleep with, the girl he used to kiss, the girl he used to hold, the girl he was probably head over heels for. Does he still have feelings for her? She shuddered at the thought.

"So you're okay?" John repeated.

She shook her head. "I never said that."

"Then you need to talk to me, Alyssa."

She held his gaze in silence. Talking about her insecurities was so foreign to her. She could talk to him about anything else, anything, just not that. She's suppressed it for so long, she didn't know how to bring it up again. It'd been a tangled complication for years, and she's given up the thought that someone would actually bother to understand. Including her. But somehow, the way John looked at her and the way his eyes urged and pleaded with her, she pulled some strength. "Okay, lets talk."

He dove right in. "What were you thinking when you learned about her?"

"I was…caught off guard. I mean, we've been friends for awhile but last night was still the first time I heard about her."

"The reason's simple. She wasn't important."

"But she was your girlfriend."

"That's just a title. You're not my girlfriend, but you're important. See how that works both ways?"

Alyssa bit her lip. The man had a point. "Okay…but…you guys were a secret too?"

"Yeah, we were."

"I respect that, I mean… you two are entitled to doing whatever you want…"Alyssa trailed off. She wasn't sure where she was going with this.

A small grin crept to John's lips. "But you felt weird finding out we were a secret too, huh? The odds."

She nodded. Just saying yes was definitely easier than having to say it.

"Well, the reasons I wanted to keep Mickie a secret is completely different from the reason I wanted to keep us a secret." John paused. He wanted her to fully register what he said before he continued.

And she did. He referred to Mickie, alone, as a secret while he referred to them as a union. The difference had to mean something.

"It was all physical with Mickie. I had sex with her before the first date even happened. Our one night stand turned into a second night stand, then a third night stand, and so on. We were traveling so much, it was hard to find other people. We went to each other for our sexual frustrations. She wanted a little more so, I asked her to be my girlfriend. I did it for the sex, not her."

John watched Alyssa's face transform with relief. He continued. "My relationship with Mickie was a secret because I was ashamed and well, because I was a jackass."

"I see." Alyssa nodded slowly. This was starting to make sense. Kind of.

"We kept at it for about a month then I told her I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't wanna lead the girl on," John storied. "And the reason why Randy knows is because he'd caught her leaving my room multiple times and started teasing me. He went and asked Mickie if anything was going on, and she told him."

Alyssa raised her eyebrows. "She snitched?"

"Eh, yeah, but I didn't care. I was planning to dump her anyway."

"I see."

"And you," John paused.

This change of subject startled her. The way he was looking at her made her heart patter even faster.

"I wanted to keep us a secret for a different reason. I didn't want any interferers."

No interferers? Us? How did hearing that make her heart rate shoot up the roof?

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Mickie myself and for the way you were bombarded with the news last night. That was stupid of me. I should've told you. It's a part of my past, and if we really are gonna build this future together, we have to know these things to better understand each other. But by me not telling you, that doesn't change anything. Everything I said about how I feel about you is true."

She nodded, carefully assimilating the significance of his words.

"But if you feel uncomfortable with us being a secret, just let me know. I'll go tell the whole world right now."

Alyssa chuckled. "Silly, I don't mind keeping us a secret for now. I prefer it, actually. I just thought it was weird when I found out you had another secret woman. But you've explained that to me, so I'm okay."

John nodded. "I have a follow up question then."

"What?"

"Why did you drink so much last night?"

"I…don't know? I mean, I was on my period last night if that says anything. TMI, PMS?" She was after some comic relief, but John barely laughed. She sighed and looked down at her fingers. She began nervously knotting them together.

John's voice brought her head back up.

"I wanna know Alyssa. I saw a part of you last night I never wanna see again, not if I can help it."

"I was just drunk," she stated matter of factly.

"You were, but why? You never go over your limit. Was it because of Mickie? Of me?"

"Partially. But most of it was because of me and my issues. This is all new to me, and I guess that was my way of freaking out." She waited for John to respond and when he didn't, she continued. "But thank you. Thank you for trying to communicate with me."

"No," John shook his head. "Thank you. This is new to you, but you're not running from it."

She shook her head. "Not this time, not from you. I can't imagine wanting to go anywhere else."

Upon hearing that, John felt his whole body relax to a tenfold. It's like a dam had been broken, washing away all his worries. He smiled at her. "You have no idea how bad I wanna kiss you right now."

"Then do it," she challenged him. Her eyes flickered with invite.

John wasted no time moving across the bed to meet his lips with hers. Suddenly, both of them felt strengthened and weakened all at the same time. He dug his fingers into her hair, feeling her body crumble beneath him. Their lips glided with each other impeccably and only stopped to look at each other.

Alyssa felt frozen under his gaze and he smiled.

"I've been wanting to do that since last night," he whispered.

"Well, I believe we have all day."

With a cheesy smile still on his face, John responded by crashing his lips back to hers.

* * *

"Johhhhhhnnnnnn!" Alyssa squealed. "I hate being ticked!"

"And I hate getting my ass-"

Before John could finish his sentence, Alyssa sent another heavy blow to his behind. Not only did she slap, but she kept her hand in place and grabbed it.

He looked at her vindictively. Oh this is war now.

He pinned her down then worked his hands all over her sides. And this was just for starters. He knew she was ticklish on nearly all areas of her body. This was too easy.

"Ugh! Johnnnn!"

Her screams didn't stop him from continuing his torment. He knew if he stopped, she'd get him right back. He trailed his working hands down to her thighs and her whole body rocketed.

"Ugh!" she squirmed under him. She reached up to scratch his face, desperate to fight him off, but he grabbed her hand before it got to him.

"You're not very fair!" she pouted in frustration.

"I know," he smirked. His hands returned frantically to her sides.

Alyssa began to pant, feeling like she'd combust at any minute. His hands were doing crazy things to her. Then suddenly, a light bulb went off in her head. She knew exactly how to make him stop. She brought her hand to the straps of her tank and began pulling it down.

John froze at the sight of her bare shoulder. He looked like a statue. "What are you doing?"

"Flashing you." She lowered more fabric, exposing the top part of her breasts. She knew exactly what effect this had on him, and she was glad to use it against him.

"Alright, alright. I'll stop! I'll stop!" He put up both hands and eased off of her.

Pulling her straps back up, she smiled. "I win."

John glared at her. "You're something else, I swear."

He shook his head momentarily before he leaned down to kiss her.

Cupping his cheeks, she smiled. "And you still don't want to have sex with me."

"Wha-" was all John could say. It wasn't even a full word. It's like his whole vocabulary had deserted him.

"I think I get it. Is it because that's all you did with Mickie, and you want us to be different?"

Looking displeased, John shook his head. "Mickie has nothing to do with you, Alyssa. No woman has any affect on me except for you."

She couldn't help but smile. "Pleased to know."

"I'm just waiting for the right time, okay? Is that so hard to believe?"

Alyssa bit her lip. "It's cute."

"I'm not trying to be cute. Why do you bring this up, anyway? Are you that anxious to get in my pants?"

Alyssa titled her head to the side, a mischievous smile on her face. "You'll never know until you try, John."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Don't temp me."

"I'm not."

Feeling tightness in his shorts, John got off and laid beside her. "You know how scared I was last night?"

"Wow, what a change of subject." Alyssa looked at him and even his expression seemed to change. He looked more serious now. Going along, she asked him a question. "Why were you scared?"

"I thought I was gonna lose you."

Alyssa laughed. She didn't understand. "Why? Because I got drunk?"

"Because I made you go over your limit."

"John, I know I was pretty out of it last night, but I'm pretty you didn't shove the alcohol down my throat."

"Yeah, but you got drunk and I know it was because of me."

"It wasn't. I told you earlier, it was me and my issues. I acted poorly, and I take all responsibility."

"I wouldn't say poorly."

"John, I practically shunned you all night, got real drunk that I don't even remember or _want_ to remember what the hell I did, when I simply could've just avoided all that by talking to you. That was pretty poor judgment of me. I apologize."

"First of all, you didn't shun me. You were by my side most of the night. You were emotionally distant, yeah. But I can't blame you for wanting space after you caught me lying. Second of all, why are you even apologizing?"

"Well, first of all, I don't consider keeping secrets as lies. And second of all, I'm apologizing for my bad actions."

"Apology not accepted." John shook his head.

Alyssa's mouth dropped.

"Apology not needed."

"Apology well needed! I was being immature last night. I should've just talked to you instead of going all wild."

"I could give a shit if you acted wilder than you did. I was more worried about you and how you were feeling. You're entitled to react however the hell you want."

"And I probably embarrassed myself in the process."

"So what? You had your reasons for reacting the way that you did and no one else has to understand. It's none of their business."

"Okay, but I still could've avoided that if I had just talked to you."

"But you didn't think of that then. Don't beat yourself up about it, now."

"Okay, okay." Alyssa stared up at the ceiling. How did she get so lucky to have this man beside her? He was so understanding and patient. She glanced over at him and saw that he was staring, too. "So….we've made it through one bad night with me."

"Good, bad, rich, poor, I'll take it all. I want you, Alyssa, every single bit of you."

"Well, you have me more than anyone's ever had me."

"I know."

"If you know then why were you scared last night?"

"Because seeing you like that, it-" John paused. He was having a hard time admitting this. "To me, it justified Randy and his overbearingness."

"Oh." Alyssa thought about this for a moment. "So you agree with him that I shouldn't be in a relationship?"

"No, I don't agree. I just thought you would."

Alyssa smiled. "Well, John, you'll never know until you try."

John set his lips into a straight line. His eyes were smiling. "Yeah, I've heard."

Alyssa laughed. "We've been cooped up in this room all day, shall we go out? I'm craving some dessert."

"Let's get you some then." John wasted no second to head them out of the door.

The comfort and intimacy they shared in the room followed them right outside. Not giving a shit about anything else in the world, the two wrapped themselves into each other's arms. They contemplated on which dessert to get and decided on crepes when they got to the lobby. As they were stepping out, someone called John's name. The couple turned and saw Sam staring curiously at their embrace. _Oh, fuck._


	10. The Problem With Time

**Massive thank you for the reviews! If I could extend my gratitude through red velvet cupcakes, I fucking would. Haha! Shout outs to awesomeone21, cena's baby doll, lauren, Pinayprincesa, my time is now, therealchamps, and 1222mercedes1222. ENJOY EVERYONE!**

* * *

Sam, Alyssa, and John all stood staring, holding their breaths. Who consumed the most surprise was hard to measure. Neither of them seemed able to obviate from the shock of what just happened: John and Alyssa had been caught. Someone else was in on their secret now.

"I've known," Sam finally said. Her voice was ghostly, but it gave the message.

She's known. _What?_

John and Alyssa exchanged looks. Their heart rates resumed and was galloping now.

"I mean, I've had my suspicions for awhile, but I guess this confirms it."

John and Alyssa still couldn't muster up a response. They remained pinned from Sam's presence.

"I mean, have you guys seen yourselves together? You two would be crazy to not give it a try."

Alyssa nodded slowly. This was almost unbelievable. Were they that obvious? And was Sam really for this?

When the couple still didn't say anything, Sam smiled at them apologetically. "Don't worry. I won't say anything."

_Crap. _Who else was this obvious to?

"Does Randy know?" John couldn't help but ask.

Sam shook her head. "You know how he is. Alyssa with men doesn't exist in his world."

Alyssa nodded again. She's well aware of her best friend's intrusive tendencies, which was the main reason she's been willing to keep John a secret. Randy could be a pain in the ass, and frankly, she just didn't want to deal with it. Not right now.

"So you're not gonna tell him?" John asked.

"Of course not. It's not my business to tell," Sam replied surely.

"Sam, thank you. I really appreciate that," Alyssa finally spoke.

"No problem. You two deserve this. But you know, don't wait forever to tell Randy. Hell could break loose if he finds out another way, you know?"

"I know, I know," Alyssa sighed. "I'm just waiting for the right time. Maybe tomorrow, maybe a month from now. Who knows."

John looked over and noticed the luggage settled behind Sam. "You going home now?" he asked, glad to change the subject.

"Yeah, I have a redeye flight."

Alyssa furrowed her brows. Something was wrong with this picture. "And Randy's not dropping you off?"

Sam shook her head meekly.

"Is everything okay?" Alyssa was almost afraid to ask.

"I guess." Sam shrugged. Her voice nearly broke, but she tried her best not to make it obvious. "He was busy most of the day, and he didn't seem to be in the best mood when I finally saw him. He's sleeping now."

It was obvious Sam was hiding something, but Alyssa found it difficult to ask for an explanation. Although Sam had no reservations about keeping their secret, there was still some intangible distance between them. Sam had been more closed off ever since her marriage started crumbling.

John piped in. "Do you want us to drop you off at the airport?"

"Oh no, there's a cab waiting for me outside. Thanks though." Sam smiled sweetly as she pulled her luggage closer to her. "I should go. I'll see you guys soon again, okay? And keep what you guys have going. I've never seen you two so happy."

John and Alyssa exchanged smiles.

"Thanks Sam. I hope you have a safe flight."

"Thank you. Bye you two!"

The couple watched as Sam inched further and further away from them. Once she was out of sight, Alyssa looked up at John and frowned.

He titled her chin up and frowned back at her. "What?"

"That's gonna be you soon. You'll be flying off and-"

John stopped her mid-sentence with a kiss. "Hush. Don't even mention that right now. Let's go get you dessert."

Alyssa smiled and followed him without protest.

* * *

Randy peeked out of the window, taking a momentary break from his task. The sun was beginning to set, and he hadn't slept much all night. There were more important things to do; like tending to the stacks and stacks of papers on his desk. This had to be perfect, and if he was going to pull it off, he needed help. So, he picked up his phone and dialed some numbers. Representative after representative helped navigated him to the best deals.

Randy felt like he was finally getting somewhere then an incoming call interrupted his flow. He looked at the screen and saw that his wife was calling him.

"She's probably calling to say she's landed," he muttered.

Just like he'd denied sleep, he decided to ignore the call.

* * *

"Just trust me."

"John, I do trust you," Alyssa insisted. She just wasn't used to walking without her eyesight. Especially at night.

"Then don't hesitate with every step you take. I'm not gonna let you fall." John continued guiding her down a graveled path. He'd blindfolded her with a black handkerchief for a surprise.

The feel and sound of the rocks under her feet definitely didn't comfort her, but the man behind her did. She was in his hands, which meant that she was in safe hands. She kept walking blindly, taking the smallest steps she could.

"We're almost there, baby. We're gonna take a few steps down okay?"

She responded by gripping his hands that were on top of her shoulders. She stepped down, then down again. Finally, John shifted her to do a slight turn.

"I'm gonna take off your blindfold now."

She nodded. The subtle nerves she had were suddenly replaced by excitement. The cloth over her face fell off, and she opened her eyes. They were on an open deck that overlooked the whole city. Right in front of her was a table under a wooded structure wrapped around by lights. Candles sat atop of the table along with two big mugs.

Alyssa's eyes feasted at the sight before her. She looked over at John, not knowing what to say. He'd rendered her speechless.

He took her hand and squeezed it. "I wanted to do something special for you before I left for Australia."

She squeezed his hand right back. "John, everything you do is special. But thank you. This is beautiful."

"I'm glad you like it," he smiled before guiding her towards the table. He pulled out her chair, then sat on his own.

The both of them stared contently at each other without saying anything.

"I was having a hard time deciding what to do for you. Then I remembered how much you love hot chocolate and how much you love views."

She nodded pleased. "Impeccable observation there, Cena."

He winked at her then took his mug to make a toast. "To us and the last two weeks."

"To us," Alyssa smiled. She clanked her drink with his then took a generous gulp. This had to be the best hot chocolate she's ever had. She closed her eyes in delight. When she opened them back up, John was staring at her.

A few seconds of silence passed. The two were obviously marinated in each other.

"I love you," John said.

Alyssa nearly dropped her mug, but thankfully, she managed to set it down before she did. All the air suddenly left her lungs. I love you? She sat there in front of him, frozen under his gaze; but inside, all she wanted to do was to jump, kick, scream.

He smiled, studying her face. He wasn't sure how she felt, but that didn't matter. He was sure of his feelings for her. "I have for awhile, but it's been a pleasure exploring it the last two weeks with you. You know, as more than a friend. I love you, Alyssa."

She waited a few beats before saying anything. This was something she would've never imagined to be true for her, but now here she was. She couldn't believe what she was about to say; although, these were words she'd been dying to express.

"John I never would've imagined this happening to me. I would've been fine without a man, but you- you're everything I never knew I wanted. You make me feel like I can do anything, like every damn day is gonna be the best day. You challenge me. You make me believe in myself. I -I never really knew what love was, but you've done a hell of a job defining it for me."

John couldn't stop the smile from forming his face. "You know Al, I'm not even worried about leaving for Australia. Three months is nothing compared to the two weeks we just had."

Alyssa leaned in and cupped his cheeks. "You're absolutely right, but hush. Don't even mention that right now."

He smiled, amused at the way she mirrored his words. He placed a hand over hers. "I don't even wanna sleep tonight."

"Then don't," she enticed.

John began to slowly nod his head. He was looking at her with a different purpose. "Oh, we wont, Al. We won't be sleeping tonight."

Alyssa tilted her head to the side, seeing the flicker of arousal in his eyes.

_Oh. _She was suddenly convinced that there would be no sleeping tonight.

* * *

A fifteen minute ride had never felt so long. Alyssa fixated her attention out the window, desperate to tame the nerves and excitement that was spiking her entire being. She stole a glance at John and he too, appeared to be under the same spell. Neither had said a word since they got in the car and both of them were fully aware they wouldn't be doing much talking later either.

Alyssa closed her eyes. Damn it. Why did he have to imply what would be happening tonight? She felt like a teenager waiting to get a damn room. And that's exactly what she was doing. She was waiting to get into a room with the man beside her, with the man she'd fallen in love with.

Her heart rate shot up the roof as soon as he drove into the hotel parking lot. She found herself biting her lip once John occupied a vacant lot. He took the keys off the ignition and bolted out of the car. He was at her door within seconds.

"Oh, John." She eased off the vehicle and looked up at him.

"Yeah?" He looked like he hadn't been breathing either.

The two stood there completely immobile. They knew better than to touch each other.

"I'm nervous," she confessed. The words came out before she was able to stop them.

John placed his shaky hand behind his neck. God, he was nervous, too. This was new. "Just relax. Don't even think about what we're about to do. Let's just walk upstairs and see what happens?"

Oh, I think we both know what's going to happen, Alyssa thought. She shook her head. This was ridiculous. They were grown adults. They could do whatever the hell they wanted. Why was her mind over thinking this? Why was she building so much momentum?

John nervously looked away as if in deep thought. "Look, we don't have to do this tonight-"

Alyssa's eyes immediately panicked with protest.

John had to laugh at this. "But I'm sure we both want to. We've been waiting for awhile now."

She bit her lip and nodded. "It's just… weird, because I'm standing here thinking about it."

"Well, we shouldn't think. Let's just do it." John leaned in and smiled at her. "I know how much you want to."

She shook her head with a guilty smile on her face. "Oh, don't act like you don't want it, too."

"I never said I didn't. Now, let's go to my room and get on with our evening." He titled his head towards the hotel entrance and offered his arm to her.

Alyssa walked right past him and headed towards it.

"That eager, huh?" John teased as he tailed behind her.

She glared at him but didn't deny the accusation. She was eager. She'd been damn eager for awhile now, and he knew that. Both of them knew that. But damn it, why did he have to preamble tonight's agenda? He should've just went for it without saying anything. Now here she was, given time to think. But since when was getting in bed with someone such a big deal? Surely, this wasn't a complicated thought process for everyone. Oh, who was she kidding, of course this was a big deal. Not only had she been uninterested in dating, but she'd been uninterested in being touched. Along came John and he managed to change both fixed beliefs. Although she was no virgin, her prolonged inactivity was making her feel inexperienced and well, nervous. It was no secret that John's been active, and how was she supposed to compare to that? Luckily, her libido was still going off the wall. Maybe that'd help. Did that also mean she was desperate? She rolled her eyes as she mutely got into the elevator. This was too confusing, too complicated. It's ridiculous. Why did John have this crazy effect on her? Just two nights ago, she got drunk instead of trying to talk things out. And now she was over thinking when she could be enjoying taking the next step.

John was watching her intently when the elevator finally reached their floor. He didn't move even when the doors slid open. "Are you sure you're okay, Al?"

She opened her mouth to say yes, but his question had her reconsider. Was she okay? She shook her head. Why wouldn't she be?

"No?" John looked at her concerned.

"Huh?"

"You shook your head; you're not okay?"

Alyssa watched as the doors began to close. Instead of answering his question, she stepped forward to ensure they wouldn't be refined within the elevator. She was in between the two sliding doors when John grabbed her elbow.

"Al, what's going on?"

"I'm fine."

The doors released her and she stepped out. John followed her reluctantly and sighed. He didn't understand. "You didn't answer my question. What's going on?"

"I told you, I'm just thinking about it. So it's making me feel weird. You shouldn't think about this stuff, you should…well…"

"Yeah and you're not looking very sure about this."

"I am, John. I love you."

He smiled and kissed her temple. "I know you do, baby. But that doesn't mean we have to physically show each other tonight."

This was true.

"But I've been ready to," she interjected.

"Maybe, but you're over thinking it and frankly, I don't want you thinking at all."

She frowned. This was so confusing. Ever since their first kiss, she'd been fantasizing about John. Now that it was turning into reality, why was she hesitating? Maybe she wasn't ready.

John lifted her chin. "Let's just go to my room and we'll cuddle. We've been perfectly fine doing that, so don't think otherwise. I don't want you stressing over something you don't have to."

"Okay," Alyssa pouted. She limply followed John into his room. Maybe they would be sleeping tonight, after all. Actually, she'd prefer it. The sight of the bed flushed her cheeks, and she was beginning to feel embarrassed. For one thing, she'd teased him several times for not wanting to take that next physical step with her. For another thing, she ended up backing out when he finally went for it. And lastly, she didn't even know what was holding her back. This wasn't making any sense.

Tonight was not supposed to turn out like this.

"Al." John waved a hand in front of her face.

She'd been staring at the bed with a blank expression on her face.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, of course." She changed her line of vision towards him. "I'm with you."

"I love you." He burrowed his eyes into hers and smiled.

"And I love you."

The two relinquished all their worries and tension to allow the inevitable smile to form their faces. To hell with their agenda for the night; as long as they were together, it didn't matter.

"Did you wanna watch a movie?" John suggested.

"That's fine."

Alyssa watched as John pried the duvet cover halfway off the bed. She hopped on and immediately settled her head on John's chest when he joined her.

"What movie would you like to see tonight?" John asked as he massaged her scalp.

"Anything. Just play anything." she answered meekly. Her mood went right back down, but she was glad John was being more than understanding. He was doing everything she could ask of him, but she couldn't quite say the same thing about herself. What the hell was going on with her?

John confessed his love for her tonight, and she confessed it was mutual. She'd been wanting him physically and this seemed to be the 'right time' that he was waiting for. Making love should be the next step, but why were they staring at the TV?

Alyssa angled her head to get a view of John.

He smiled at her and when she didn't reciprocate, he frowned. "You sure you're okay, baby?"

She pouted.

Leaning in, he kissed her pout. It was too cute not to.

"I'm okay," she answered. "I just don't know why we're watching instead of…"

John chuckled. He noticed the way she always trailed off when she was too shy to say something. "Look, I know you had your fun pressuring me about sex, but I'm not pressuring you. We don't have to do it, and you don't have to give me a reason as to why not. I understand."

She sat up exasperated. "_I_ don't understand. I do want to but…"

"That's exactly it. There shouldn't be a but." John gently pulled her back down to rest on his chest. "Just relax and stop thinking about it. I don't care what the hell we do tonight as long as we enjoy each other's company. This is my last night with you."

"Okay. Okay." She took a deep breath and tried her best to nudge away her qualms. He was right, this was his last night. Surely, she shouldn't be pouting, worrying, or questioning; when she could be smiling and laughing with him.

And that, she did. The two enjoyed the rest of their night. It was nothing short of the last two weeks they shared.

Around four hours past midnight, Alyssa's eyelids started dropping, and she couldn't help but admit herself to sleep. John gladly watched her before he too, fell asleep. His mind drifted off into dreams of her. Meanwhile, Alyssa's past began to terrorize her. The reasons she's resisted a man's touch was making their way into her dreams. It wasn't being forgotten anymore.

* * *

John couldn't have prepared himself for this. Not even all the time in the world. But see, that was his problem with time. No matter what, he couldn't stop it. He was helpless.

"John, please don't," Alyssa begged. Her eyes were brimming with tears, but thankfully, a few blinks was enough to bat them away. John and her had been standing in front of his terminal gate for awhile now. But to them, it felt like two seconds. Time always felt short when you least wanted it to.

"I don't wanna leave you," John said, his voice tinged with sadness. Unlike Alyssa, he allowed his waterworks to settle along his lower lashes. He didn't care to hide his emotions; all he wanted was to stay with the woman in front of him.

"But you have to, baby. You said it yourself, three months is nothing."

John only looked at her and didn't reply. He couldn't seem to relinquish his bogged mentality. The dread of being away from Alyssa for three months was relentless. Surely, he's used to traveling from place to place. But Alyssa's made it feel like home for him and now that she would be away, what was he supposed to look forward to at the end of the day?

She cupped his cheeks, tenderly massaging it with her thumb. She was proving to be the stronger one today. Someone had to be.

A voice over the intercom went on. "This is the final boarding call for passenger John Cena booked on flight 414A to Australia. Please proceed to gate 7 immediately. The captain will order for the doors of the aircraft to close in approximately 5 minutes time. I repeat, this is the final boarding call for John Cena. Thank you."

A burdened sigh caused a tremor to his lips. Closing his eyes, a small tear trickled down his face. His vision was blurred when he opened his eyes back up, but that didn't matter. Alyssa was still in front of him. He crashed his forehead against hers.

"I love you, John."

"I love you, too."

Alyssa forced a smile. "Call me as soon as you land."

"You fucking bet."

She kissed him one last time, forcing her memory to resonate with her senses. She wanted to remember every bit of this- his soft lips, his possessive hold on the back of her head, his sense of urgency, want, and need for her. She knew, she knew what she was feeling would not leave her. John's body could be miles away, but he would never leave her.

"I'll see you soon, baby," John said.

Her lips formed a smile- her eyes saying something different- as she stepped away from him. "I'll see you soon."

John forced him eyes elsewhere, knowing it was the only way he'd be able to finally walk away. He grabbed his carry-on and headed towards the gate.

Alyssa bravely watched on as John grew into the distance. He turned around to look at her and wave, and she waved back. She waited until he completely disappeared from view before she willed herself to finally walk away, too.

"So far, so good. So far, so good," she repeated like a mantra.

Alyssa managed to get out of the airport without much emotional drain. Things were going to be okay, and John would be back to her in no time. She got into the car and suddenly, an overwhelming feeling of barrenness hit her. The passenger seat was empty. There was no one to laugh with. There was no one to talk to about everything. There was no one to get dessert with. There was no one who'd be so patient and so understanding with her. There was no John.

Alyssa swallowed the dry lump in her throat, aware of her uncontrolled breathing. She wasn't surprised when she noticed her hands began shaking. The tears…her eyes…they were beginning to blur. _Fuck_. She'd done so well until now. She'd done so well until John was really gone.

In her best efforts to suppress her qualms, she noticed light emitting from the center console of the car. It was her phone; someone was calling her. In hopes that it was John, she frantically reached for it and picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hey Alyssa."

It was definitely not the voice she expected, nor hoped for; but it washed her with a surprising feeling of comfort. "Hey, Rands."

"Are you alright?" he asked. He was able to hear the trace of sadness in her voice.

"Yeah-yeah, I am. What's up?"

"I have good news. I've got our Europe trip all settled. We're leaving tomorrow morning."

"Wait! What?" Alyssa's posture went from limp to stiff. Tomorrow morning? Europe? With Randy?

"Yeah and I talked to Vince about our leaves. I've got everything covered. All you needa worry about is packing your clothes. I could come by tonight if you want me to help."

God, her best friend wasn't intrusive in _just_ her love life. He could be intrusive in all areas, if he damned well pleased. Planning the whole trip without consulting her? What if she had other plans? Did he expect her to discard all that just for him? Gosh, no. Fuck no! She wanted to tell him that, to yell at him. Randy couldn't have his way with her however way he pleased, and he needed to know that. This was irritating. But he was in luck. Europe would not be too bad of a distraction from missing John, Alyssa realized. Not bad at all.


	11. For the First Time

**Shout outs to those who reviewed the previous chapter! Thank you for your support my time is now, Cena's baby doll, therealchamps, awesomeone21, 1222mercedes1222, and Pinayprincesa. Enjoy everybody!**

* * *

Alyssa couldn't believe how tired she was. She could barely keep her eyes open. This minimal task, one that seemingly needed no effort, was proving to be a challenge. It left her with no choice but to finally succumb. Someone might as well have glued her eyes shut; she was in no desire to open them for awhile. She was exhausted.

"Alyssa? Alyssa. Alyssa!"

She heard these grumbles inches away from her ear, but that wasn't enough to gravitate her attention. She wanted her sleep, and no one was going to keep her from it. Still, a commotion seemed to be going on. Not only was there a voice, but someone was touching her. Someone was poking her. She furrowed her eyebrows in annoyance and turned to the other side. She had no measure of time nor place; all she knew was that this was the most comfortable she's felt in days. It felt good to close her eyes. It felt good to quell the tension in her muscles. It felt good to simply be…well, unconscious. But this disturbance was not helping. It wasn't helping at all. Why couldn't the world just leave her alone?

When the world didn't answer, she smiled. There. The voice and the poking stopped. It went away. She smiled into sleep until a pair lips captured hers. Her eyes shot open, and her heart stopped. She wanted to scream but her body was still trying to wake up. She blinked her surroundings into focused and realized she was on a couch. And John was hovering over her. _What?_

"John! Wha- I- you- you're-" She immediately stopped talking when she realized she could be doing something better. She closed her mouth and threw herself into his arms. The way her body responded to this was alerting. She was tingling all over.

"I've missed you," he whispered, matching her tight embrace.

She closed her eyes, not believing this was happening. "Am I dreaming right now?"

John released her slightly to look at her face. "You might've been. It took me awhile to wake you up."

Alyssa rubbed her eyes and pouted. She was missing parts of this puzzle. What the hell was John doing here? Had she slept a chunk of her life away? Was that why she's feeling so tired?

She stared at John in confusion; but seeing him, it made her not want to question anything. She was just glad to have him here.

John, looking as gentle as ever, was careful not to shake her delicate state. He smoothened out her hair and started to explain. "I'm only here for the night. I got three days off and I decided to see you."

She blinked. Okay, so he's visiting.

"Thankfully, you're simultaneously back from your Europe trip with Randy."

Europe. _Right. _That seemed like ages ago; the fifteen hour flight, with turbulence, had done more than scare Alyssa. This must be the aftershocks.

"I'm sorry for waking you up, but I just couldn't help myself. We only got a few hours. Besides, I don't know how long you could've stayed safe sleeping on a public chair in a hotel."

Alyssa looked around and realized she'd fallen asleep while looking at the bistro menu. Funny what fatigue could do, it completely dismissed her efforts to feed her hunger. But at least she was caught up with reality now. She had everything pieced together.

John smiled and changed the subject. "The guys on set got three days off too, and they thought I was crazy for wanting to fly back home. But I told them I had two days more than usual, so why the hell not. Besides, like I said, I missed my baby."

Alyssa grinned dreamily into John's eyes. He had to be the best thing on earth. He'd done a good job keeping in touch every day despite the time differences. Now here he was, visiting even with his tight schedule. She stole a few more seconds just to stare at him. Nothing could compare to this man. Nothing had an effect on her like he did. Not even sleep or Europe.

He leaned over and pecked her lips.

"I'm hungry," she told him. Their mouths brushing against each other.

"Me too." He settled himself beside her on the couch and grabbed the menu. "Let's go order something and you could tell me about your trip."

"Deal," Alyssa agreed. "As long as we order first."

The two looked over the menu and ordered more food than they probably wanted. They were in each other's presence again and that surely called for a celebration. They hadn't seen in each in 20 days! That was 20 days too long.

"So, how was Europe?" John asked. His elbows were on his knees with his head turned to Alyssa.

She, on the other hand, was nestled comfortably on the corner of the couch. Her eyes were gleaming. Europe, as expected, went beyond her imagination. Sure, she often thought about John and was wishing he was the one with her. However, that didn't deter her experience in the slightest bit. Randy wasn't kidding when he said he had everything covered. His planning was immaculate. Day to day flowed in smoothly, and there was really nothing to complain about. She saw more of Europe she could've ever asked for.

"It was amazing. Every day was just something new, something interesting. I couldn't stop looking around and just being in complete awe. And the people are so different. It's refreshing."

"And Randy?"

Alyssa shot John a reassuring look and smiled. "Randy was good. It was like we were in college all over again."

"And what does that mean?" John curiously looked at her.

"It means, he was exactly the way I wished him to be. College Randy was my favorite Randy, and that's the one I got."

John thought about this. She got the Randy she wanted. Hm. What was he supposed to say to that?

"Randy wasn't acting crazy or irrational. He was just…normal."

"I see. Sounds like the best friend I used to know," John chuckled. Although, he knew this really wasn't a laughing matter.

Alyssa frowned. John and Randy hadn't been acting like best friends, and she was having trouble remembering when it started. But that was often the case with life. You never realize what's really going on until you look back and see how different things are from what they used to be. John and Randy, for example, are definitely different than how they used to be. The scariest part was that neither of them seemed to mind.

"Anyway," John cleared his throat. "I'm glad you had a good time with your best friend. You deserved that vacation."

His simple words were enough to take her worries away. She changed her train of thought and smiled. "And I'm glad that-" she paused and wrapped both arms protectively around John's neck. "-you're back."

"Me too, baby. Me too." He held her hand that hung over his shoulders and squeezed it.

She reciprocated by kissing his neck then settling her head at the curve of it. Something about his touch and being able to smell his scent was intoxicating. She missed this. She missed his touch.

"Your turn, John. Tell me about Australia."

He began rhythmically massaging her back. "It's been good. I miraculously remember my lines, and the weather isn't too bad. I just get real cold at night."

"Mm, that's funny, I'm pretty cold at night, too," she said softly.

John worked his hands up her arms. "Well, I better do something about that tonight then, huh?"

Before Alyssa could respond, a waiter came by with their food, instantly breaking off the spark. Thankfully, this interruption came with good aroma. It reminded the both of them how hungry they were. So, they spent the next few minutes feeding their empty stomachs, while silently enjoying their reunion. It was one of those moments when no words were needed.

Alyssa briefly closed her eyes after devouring the last contents on her plate. It felt like forever since she'd last eaten something. "That was delicious."

John was more than pleased to see the satisfied look on her face. That's all he ever wanted to see. "I'm glad you still enjoyed that meal even after eating in Europe for three weeks."

"Are you kidding me? Their cuisine was good, don't get me wrong, but American food's my favorite. And your company surely helps."

"Yes. Everything tastes better when I eat with you," John smiled, showcasing his dimples. He leaned back on his seat and stared at the woman beside him.

She moved closer to interlace their hands together. "You must me tired from your flight. Let's get you rested in my room?"

John wasn't going to say no to that. "Lead the way, baby."

He watched her get up and tug on his hand. "Let's go."

And off they went.

John found himself dozing on and off as they made their way up to her floor. There was far more people in the hotel than he'd hoped there would be. All the fuss and distraction did nothing to please his growing desire for sleep. Thankfully, Alyssa was there. And soon enough, she was the only one there. He was more than happy to get into her room and onto the bed. White sheets had never felt so good to lay on.

Alyssa eyed him with amusement. Someone was more tired than her, and he was looking damn cute. She flopped on the bed beside him and smiled. "You should sleep. Your head's been bopping so much, it looks like it's about to fall off."

Against his better judgment, he shook his head and extended his arm out. "No, I didn't come here to sleep. I came here to be with you."

"Well, you can have both."

"You gonna sleep with me then?"

"Nope."

"Exactly. I'm not sleep-" John stopped mid-sentence when he found Alyssa's lips on his. It started light until desire burrowed into her, passion suddenly driving her intentions.

Fighting to stay awake at this point was the least of his worries. He was fighting something else. He wanted her, he needed her, now more than ever, and he knew it was pointless to fight it. He deepened the kiss between them while digging his fingers into her hair. All his senses were coming alive.

Alyssa's heart started thumping as John eased himself on top of her. His mouth was still exploring hers, enchanting even as it seduced. Her body was taking over. Or maybe it was her heart. She was having trouble separating the two as the needs of one so closely echoed the needs of the other.

For the first time, she was ready to surrender herself to the man who was more than ready to make love to her.

* * *

Alyssa stared in silence, dazed by what just happened. They'd done it not once, but twice already. She knew this was going to mark her life forever. John, who was calmly nestling his head on top of her chest, had showed her love beyond any measure she thought was possible. She never wanted anything more than him.

"I can't believe you're gonna do that to me then just leave and go back to Australia," she whispered, helpless.

John, physically exhausted yet satisfied, couldn't believe this either. It was just his luck; he had to go back to Australia. Before he was able to formulate a response, she began massing the back of his head, instantly sating him. Her touch was so electrical, it was hard for him to believe someone so powerful could've been inactive for as long as she claimed to be. He didn't know details, nor want to know, but he was aware he was the first man she's been in bed with for years. Her performance tonight didn't make that obvious at all, and boy was that a pleasant surprise. Not that it mattered, of course. Showing her his love was more important than the physical aspect, but they magically managed to fulfill every dire need. Mind, body, and soul.

"I love you," he said. They were words that had been echoing his head all night.

"I love you, too."

Silence claimed the room again. Their mere presence was enough for each other. And they were too busy reviving over the contents of tonight to really do anything else. It wasn't until half an hour passed when Alyssa thought of something else.

"John?"

"Yeah?" He was still draped over her like a vine. Naked.

"I wanna tell Randy about us, now."

The usual dread that washed over John, at the mention of this other man's name, was quick to come and leave. Frankly, he didn't care anymore. What can Randy do? Nothing.

Alyssa explained. "We were so good in Europe and if I don't tell him now, it's gonna threaten that."

John's only reservation was the fact that telling Randy now meant he'd have less alone time with Alyssa. But this had to be done. "Okay."

"Really? You're okay with this?" Alyssa propped up John's head by cupping his cheeks. As soon as his orbs burrowed into hers, she forgot what she was talking about. Everything went out of her head.

He hung onto a few seconds of silence, knowing just what affect he had on her, before nodding his head. He smirked. "Why are you so surprised?"

She still hadn't remembered what they were talking about. She was just staring.

"Come. Let's go to Randy before I change my mind and go for round three." John threatened. He eased off of her, daring not to stare at her bare chest, to grab his clothes off the floor. He was dressed in seconds. Meanwhile, Alyssa was still having trouble snapping out of their bubble. Why did she bring up Randy again?

Before she knew it, John had tossed her clothes to her. She put them on without much thought and followed him out of the room. Everything after this felt ridiculously banal. Thankfully, the walk to Randy's room wasn't too long of a journey. He was on the same floor.

"We're here," Alyssa said.

Here they go. She didn't wait another second to knock. John was standing firmly behind her.

Before either of them could anticipate what was to come next, the door swung open, revealing a somber Randy. His eyes were bloodshot, his hair was sticking all over the place, and his clothes looked corrugated. And when he spoke, his voice was ghostly. He was barely audible.

"I caught Sam cheating on me."


	12. Already Gone

**Damn, this chapter had me staring at a blank screen for awhile. I buckled down and miraculously produced most of it in one sitting, so here it is. I hope you all enjoy! T****hanks to**** my time is now, therealchamps, 1222mercedes1222, awesomeone21, Hi14 x, and Cena's baby doll for reviewing. **

* * *

She fucked up. There was no doubt about that. Infidelity wasn't something to be proud of, but it wasn't what Sam regretted most. The way Randy found out about the affair was what killed her. He wasn't supposed to find out on his own. She was planning on telling him. She was going to do it as soon as she saw him. But fate had other plans, and at the end of the day, that's all that mattered. _Fate. _

Randy had been the one doubtful all along, but it was ultimately her who acted on it. There was officially nothing left to salvage in their marriage. It's clear now that it'd been dead a long time ago. The cheating, however, only started two weeks ago. It was never in her plans; it just happened. The opportunity fell into her hands one night, and well, she took it. She was lonely. What else was she supposed to do?

"Jesus Christ, Randy, answer me."

With shaky hands, Sam dialed her husband's number again. He'd sent her straight to voicemail the last few times, but that wasn't stopping her from trying to contact him again and again. They needed to talk. She needed to explain. Whether it was for Randy's sake or her own, she didn't really know. But she was adamant to talk this through with him. It needed to be done, and she'd rather it be sooner than later.

After another failed attempt to connect their lines, she decided to leave a message. "Randy, it's Sam. Please answer me. We're gonna have to talk eventually. Give me a chance. Please. That's all I ask."

She closed her eyes, sighed, and said I love you. Then she hung up. Not a second later, her phone went off. She picked up on instinct.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby."

Sam's stomach began to twist. It wasn't Randy.

* * *

"I caught Sam cheating on me."

Randy had said this twice already, as if trying to wake himself up from a nightmare; but still, no one was obviating from the standstill. There was complete silence.

Randy was staring straight at Alyssa, but he really wasn't looking at her. His mind was going haywire. It'd been a good fifteen minutes since he found out about his wife's infidelity and the minutes that followed hadn't done much to tame the blow.

"I caught Sam cheating on me," Randy said again. This time, his voice was much fuller and the anger was starting to bleed through. "You know how I found out? Through a text message."

His fingers curled in to make fists. The evident tension coiling his muscles was making John and Alyssa much more stiff. And mute.

"A. Text. Message." Randy gritted his teeth. His mind immediately went back to the cryptic message. He memorized it by now.

_ Bryan, I had a really good night last night. I'll see you later at my house._

It didn't set in at first that something was wrong, but as soon as Sam sent the next few messages, trying vehemently to recant, Randy knew she was guilty. _Who knew my phone could tell me my wife was a hoe, _he replied. She then called, confessed, and cried. It was pathetic. This whole thing was pathetic. How stupid could she be, getting caught through an electronic device? How stupid could she be to cheat in the first place?

"Fuck! How stupid am I? I did everything to try and fix that marriage, but she's over there, gallivanting with another man. And in my house?"

Alyssa didn't say anything, but she finally walked into the room to hug her best friend. She's never seen him so shaken. The heavy pounding of his chest was the first thing she noticed when they reached contact. His heart was racing, and she knew it was breaking at the same time.

They were barely three seconds into the embrace when Randy pulled away. He sought it best to lean on his on weight. He couldn't possibly stay in someone's hold without promising to stay upright. He briefly closed his eyes and shook his head.

"In my fucking house," he whispered.

Alyssa searched Randy's face, wanting desperately for him to absorb her strength, but all she got was a mirror of devastation. Surely, there must be something appropriate for her to say, but she just didn't know what they were. She stood stunned.

Randy exhaled deeply and looked straight ahead. He saw John for the first time. With obvious effort, he smiled and changed the subject. "You're back."

John parted his lips and nodded. He couldn't hide the surprise in his face; there'd been so much going on: making love to Alyssa for the first and second time, agreeing to revealing their secret, Sam's infidelity, and now, Randy looking at him like he used to. Like they were actually best friends.

"He's only here for a visit," Alyssa explained.

Randy nodded, pleased. "Do you guys wanna come in?"

"Yes," Alyssa replied with the most cheerful tone she could possibly utter.

The three of them silently moved further into the room with John closing the door behind them. Randy sat on the desk chair and turned his phone back on. Meanwhile, John and Alyssa hesitantly sat on the foot of the bed. The stoic silence that ensued the room was unnerving.

"So John, how's Australia been?" Randy looked up from his phone screen.

"Uh…well…it's been good."

Randy nodded, returning his sights back to the device that had changed his life just a few minutes ago. His eyes danced at the long list of missed calls, voicemail, and text messages. What the hell was he supposed to do with this?

Seeing Randy's distraction, Alyssa looked over at John nervously. She suddenly remembered why they came here, and it was making her heart hammer away to a tenfold. John used his eyes to point at Randy, silently willing her to say something. She shook her head as John leaned closer to her.

"You said you wanted to tell him before it threatened anything," he whispered.

Before Alyssa's mind could marinate in dread even more, Randy's phone went off.

He stared at it disapprovingly. "What does she want from me?"

Alyssa's eyes met Randy's. His orbs burrowed into her, and he looked broken. Irreconcilable.

"She complained and bitched about our marriage, so I did what I could to fix it. Apparently, that wasn't enough, so she gets more from another man. And now she's calling me? She's calling _me_?"

No other sounds followed his question.

Randy crashed his forehead to his phone and sighed. He got up a second later. "Excuse me guys, but I got business to take care of."

"You're leaving?" Alyssa asked. She eyed her best friend, and he didn't appear to be capable of handling any business.

"Yeah. I'ma try to go home and get my shit out of there. She can have everything else," he shrugged. He walked over to his unpacked suitcase and started dumping the contents out. What he needed was an empty bag. "I should be back by tonight. I'm not planning on staying to chit chat."

"You sure you wanna do this right now?" John asked. "You barely got back from Europe. You should rest first."

"Rest." Randy enunciation the word. "I won't know what that is until I get my stuff away from Sam. And right now, I just wanna get it over with." Randy checked for his passport before grabbing the handle to the suitcase. "I gotta go."

He was out the door before John or Alyssa had a chance to protest.

* * *

"I couldn't do it. I couldn't tell him." Alyssa, back in her room with John, dithered over the contents of the last hour. What an emotional roller coaster she'd just gone on.

John was laying on the bed beside her. Their eyes were to the ceiling, with hands clasped over their chests.

"It probably wasn't the right time, but when will it ever be?" John asked. It was a practical question. He wasn't dying to tell Randy at first, but he couldn't deny the disappointment that washed over him when they didn't. Like Randy, John wanted to get it over with. And frankly, he wanted the whole world to know about him and Alyssa already. He wanted them to know that she was is and he was hers.

"He looked so broken, John. I couldn't do it. I couldn't tell him that I've been deceptive, too."

Her words forced his head to snap towards her. "You weren't trying to be deceptive."

"But that's how he's gonna look at it," Alyssa groaned. "Ugh. I'm a horrible, horrible best friend."

John reached for her hand. "You're not. And if he's the same Randy you described earlier, he's not a horrible best friend either. He'll understand."

Alyssa was feeling her head sink deeper and deeper onto the pillow. Will he understand? He's never been the most understanding with men. What more when he finds out she's been hiding it from him?

"Everything's gonna be okay. Don't worry."

Alyssa exhaled sharply and forced her train of thought elsewhere. "When are you leaving?"

John hesitated to answer.

She sat up and squeezed his hand. "John?"

"In thirty minutes," he regretfully said.

"What? Thirty minutes? Why didn't you tell me!" Her eyes panicked and so did John's. Her glare was so sharp, it cut.

"I didn't want you counting down," he explained calmly.

"Thirty minutes?" Alyssa frowned. "That's so little time."

"It's more than what we've had these last twenty days," he rationalized. He offered his arm for her to fold in to. "You should sleep."

"Now? But you wont be there when I wake up."

"I'll be a call away. Come on." He pulled her towards him.

Against her own wishes, she closed her eyes. She didn't know what else to do. The whole world was feeling so out of sorts: Randy's failing marriage, his unawareness to her relationship with John, his irrationality to the men in her life, John leaving in thirty minutes. Where was she supposed to pull her strength from? It's as if she'd suddenly been stripped naked, and there was no where for her to run.

She closed her eyes tighter, like a scared kid, hoping for all the problems to just disappear.

"Everything's gonna be okay," John repeated, as if he'd been reading her mind.

He kissed her temple, and in an instant, she was fast asleep.

* * *

Randy stood in front of his house. It was a beautiful two story mansion with six bedrooms, four baths, and a theater. He snickered at the thought of Sam filling up the space with random men. It wasn't funny, but it wasn't a sad image he wanted to instill in his head. He briefly eyed the fountain, a last minute installment they'd decided on, before heading towards the entrance. He fished his pockets for the keys and opened the door.

The sight of the foyer immediately brought him back to the last time he came home. Sam nearly tackled him when he walked in. She was all hugs and kisses, and their marriage was just starting to feel exciting again. Like they were newlyweds.

Randy shook his head when he realized what he was doing, and shut the door. There was no sign of Sam anywhere, and he was glad.

Damn it, she better not be in the master, he thought bitterly. He walked through the empty living room and the empty kitchen to reach his office. He shut the door behind him and immediately started packing his things. All his belongings needed to be out of this house. He was never going to come back.

He absentmindedly filled his suitcase to the brim, not caring for any order or organization. Once he was done with that, he made his way up to the master bedroom.

The door flung open before he got to it. His firm mentality was suddenly knocked off balance.

"Randy!" Sam exclaimed. Her voice was high-pitched, despite her somber appearance. She looked like she'd been crying all day, but she also appeared to be pleased to see him.

"I just came to get my stuff," he said calmly.

He walked closer to make his way into the room; but Sam blocked him, her eyes desperately pleading.

"Randy, hear me out."

"Sam-" Randy warned. "Just get out of my way."

But she stood her ground.

Randy briefly closed his eyes. Hadn't she done enough damage? Why was she imprisoning him with this reminder of what he used to have? Didn't she understand he didn't want to see her? To be around her?

When he opened his eyes again, Sam was standing directly in front of him. She'd walked closer.

"Samantha, don't do this."

"Randy, you know, you know I tried to stay. I tried to fix our marriage."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "So you decide to cheat?"

"I tried to be this obedient wife, this-this perfect wife you always wanted, but I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't."

Randy stepped backed as if her words had physically stung him. But they did way more damage than any physical sensation could ever do. "You don't need to explain yourself."

"But I do have to explain! I have to get this off my chest."

"Hell Sam, you got what you wanted didn't you?" Randy threw his hands up in the air, feeling his blood start to boil. So much for keeping composure. How much longer was she going to stretch this unbearable confrontation? He didn't need this. He didn't need to hear that she didn't want to be with him anymore; her infidelity had long proven that.

"If I got what I wanted, I would've gotten you!" Sam argued back. Tears were rolling down her face now.

"You had me!" Randy yelled. He charged at her, making her flinch at his every word. His knuckles were turning white from his formed fists and he needed a release. He spun around and grabbed the nearest item and launched it to the wall. The wooden table crumbled to ragged pieces. Randy went after a second table, this time, with much more force and power. It shattered within seconds.

Something inside him had snapped. He gave her everything he possibly could, and there she was, saying she didn't even have him at all. How ungrateful.

Shaking, Sam covered her mouth and backed up against the wall. Her jelly legs couldn't stay upright any longer. She watched her husband run his hands through his hair. He hovered over the broken pieces, staring at his destruction. Pain and exhaustion was claiming him.

All he wanted was to get his belongings. He really didn't want to have to do this.

"I'm not proud of what I did, Randy. At the end of all this, I hope you know I do love you."

Randy exhaled sharply. He didn't understand when and how normality escaped his life, but he knew it was gone. Things would never be the same again.

Sam pushed herself off the wall and forced herself to look away. "I just can't be with someone who's in love with somebody else."

Randy closed his eyes, feeling something inside him crumble. There were now tears stinging his own eyes. He blinked them away, and when he turned around, Sam was already gone.


	13. To Forgive and Forget

**This chapter is the chapter I've been wanting to write even before the first one. I hope you all enjoy! Thanks to Hi14 x, therealchamps, Pinayprincesa, awesomeone21, my time is now, 1222mercedes1222, and Cena's baby doll for reviewing the last chapter. You guys keep me going :)**

* * *

**Two Months Later **

This was definitely not how he envisioned today to be. He was supposed to be reuniting with Alyssa, asking her out, eating with her, being with her. But no, his flight had to be cancelled. It was just his luck. He'd have to wait another day to see her. After weeks of being away, it should've been easier by now. But it wasn't. There was never a day that passed that John didn't wish he was with Alyssa instead.

"More time to plan how to ask you out, I guess."

He sat on the swivel chair, restless. The walls of this particular hotel room had been home to him the last three months, and there were many nights he gladly called it that. After long hours of work, all a man could really ask for was sleep. But now, all John could ask for was to be back in America. He longed for that proximity with Alyssa. The fact that he was getting ready to finally ask her to be his girlfriend was making him even more impatient.

"Damn, I could ask you to marry me already."

John chuckled at the thought of proposing to her. They weren't even officially together, and he was already thinking about marriage. How crazy was he?

"But I suppose I wouldn't mind calling you my girlfriend first."

He leaned onto the desk and grabbed a piece of paper. This was a familiar routine for him; he was going to further perfect his plan to be officially off the market.

* * *

Alyssa wasn't happy to hear John's homecoming was being delayed, but right now, she had other things on her mind. She was in a hotel room with Randy. He was sitting in front of her with a stack of paperwork on his lap with absolutely no readable expression on his face. He was looking through divorce papers.

"I can't believe it took this long for them to be filed," he said softly. His eyes traveled along the fine print until his fingers worked its way to sign on the dotted line. He showed no signs of hesitation. It's like he'd been removed from emotion entirely.

"You okay?" Alyssa asked. From experience, she's known Randy's aloofness was never a guarantee that he was okay. He'd always been good at concealing his true feelings. In fact, he was so good, he often believed his lies, too. Alyssa usually saw right through it.

When Randy began tapping the pen on his lap, instead of answering her question, she piped up. "Randy! Are you okay or not?"

He looked up at her impassively. "Yes"

_Yes, my ass. _"Well, if ever you feel anything, please do come and tell me. It'd be good to know my best friend still actually has a heart."

Randy formed a small smile. His best friend had jokes. She was always cute when she acted displeased with him. "To be honest with you Al, I don't have one."

Before she could reply, her phone went off. It was John. "Well, if you excuse me, I'm gonna take this call outside."

Randy barely reacted as she got up to exit. She picked up once she settled herself against the wall across Randy's door.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby, how are you?" John's voice was low and husky. Alyssa's heart didn't fail to pitter-patter like usual.

"I'm alright. I'm with Randy right now, and he just signed the divorce papers."

"Oh yeah? How's he holding up with that?"

"Well, he's too detached from his feelings, and I feel like it's gonna blow up in his face one day."

"So does that mean the divorce hasn't changed anything between you two?"

Alyssa silently repeated his question. "What do you mean?"

"Ah, I don't know." John's voice trailed off, and she could tell he was after something.

"John, what do you mean?"

"I'm just wondering if he's pulled any of that stunt he did the last time we drank with him."

The last time we drank with him…

Alyssa's memory was failing her, and she didn't know what to say.

Her silence was making John nervous, and he didn't hide it. His voice filled with worry. "Remember when he tried to kiss you?"

"Oh!" Alyssa exclaimed. It took a second for it to resonate, but yes, she definitely remembered. "When he was drunk?"

"Yeah."

"He was drunk," she stated matter-of-factly. She sounded like her usual self: making excuses for Randy.

"Well, has he tried anything?"

Alyssa sighed. She waited a few seconds to reply, knowing just what it did to him. It was cruel to suspend him, but did he really have to ask? "John, if he did, I would've told you already. Don't you know that?"

Relief washed over him. So, Randy hadn't done anything. John almost felt silly for insisting they continue keeping their secret until he got back. But hey, he wanted to be face to face with Randy when they told him. Alyssa, on the other hand, had stated several times that it was getting harder and harder to keep it from Randy. But ultimately, she respected John's wishes and abided by it.

"Yes baby, I know. I was just making sure."

Alyssa smiled. Overprotective John was kind of cute. It was definitely an improvement from Randy's style of tyranny.

"I can't wait to see you," he said.

"Me too. What time is your flight ag-" Alyssa was interrupted when Randy popped his head out of the room. She pulled the phone away from her ear and looked at him curiously.

"I'm hungry. Let's go eat dinner?"

She nodded her head then signaled that she'd be with him in a minute. Randy disappeared from view, leaving the door to be in between them once again.

"Baby, I'll call you later. We're about to eat."

"Okay. Enjoy your meal. I love you."

"Thanks. I love you too." Alyssa hung up and walked back into the room.

Randy was standing over the desk with his eyes on the stack of paper.

"Let's go?" she asked him.

He changed his line of vision towards the door and mutely followed her out. Tension settled along his shoulders as he walked and just when Alyssa was going to comment on it, Randy halted his steps.

"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me," he muttered bitterly.

Alyssa immediately stopped dead on her tracks and followed where his eyes were. Her mouth dropped.

Sam was standing at the end of the hallway about to walk into a room with some man.

"Out of all hotels in Missouri," Randy spat. He began shaking his head vigorously. "Fuck, dinner. Let's go to a bar right now, Alyssa."

He stomped off towards the elevators before she could stop him.

* * *

Who knew one could be consumed with nervousness and excitement at the same time. John's heart was hammering away at his ribs as he walked past the throng of people. Among the airline crowd, he was only looking for one face.

And there it was, more beautiful than he remembered.

Alyssa was standing by a wall, hugging herself. A smile automatically formed her face as soon as they locked eyes. They joined together like magnets.

John picked her up and spun her around. Once he set her down, he immersed himself into her presence "Fuck, I've missed you."

She nuzzled her head along the curve of his neck and returned his tight embrace. "It's so good to have you back."

He released her, then kissed her. The smile on his face could not be wiped away. He was finally home.

"How was your flight?" she asked softly.

"It was good. It led me back to you." He grinned a boyish grin as he looked at her.

Alyssa couldn't suppress a smile of her own. John was finally in front of her again.

And as they stood face to face, he slightly narrowed his eyes. There was something in hers that didn't settle quite right with him. "You okay?"

She narrowed her eyes right back. "Of course, I am. Why?"

He silently held her gaze a few more beats before nodding his head. "I'm just making sure my baby's doing alright."

Alyssa smiled, and it reached her eyes this time. "I am; you're back. You sure you'll be fine going straight to the arena?"

John raised his eyebrows. He almost forgot he'd been assigned to go to the live show as soon as his plane touched down. This was another sad effect to his delayed flight. "Yeah, I'll be fine."

Alyssa cupped his cheek before tip toeing to kiss him again. "Let's go to work?"

"With you?" John put his arm around her. "Gladly."

Arm in arm, the two walked out of the airport.

It felt like seconds until John found himself needing to separate from Alyssa again. They were at the arena before they knew it.

"Well, I got some paperwork to take care of," she frowned. "Get some rest before your segment, and I'll see you after?"

"Sounds good." He leaned in to kiss her. "I'll see you soon."

Alyssa winked at him, then pulled away. If she'd stayed a second more, she probably would've never left his side.

Meanwhile, John watched her leave. The only thing that was making this easy on him was the reminder that he'd see her as soon as tonight. That was definitely a step up from the last couple of months.

On his way to his locker room, John decided to take a detour.

He knocked on the door, turned the knob, and peeped in. "Orton!"

"Hey, you're back." Randy looked up as he finished wrapping the black tape around his wrist. "Come in."

John walked in and closed the door behind him. "How are you?"

"Eh, I'm alright. It's been uh…interesting, to say the least. Especially the last couple days."

John raised his eyebrows. He was waiting for Randy to elaborate, and when he didn't, he took it upon himself to ask. "What do you mean, exactly?"

"Well-" Randy stopped. He appeared to be in deep debate. "Something happened."

"Divorce, right?"

"Yeah, that, too." Randy scratched his head. "But something happened after that."

There was a long pause. A long strenuous pause. An obvious struggle was going on with Randy, and when he spoke up, his voice nearly broke. "Me and Al hooked up."

And for John, everything after that became a complete blur.

* * *

For the first time, John couldn't bare the thought of seeing Alyssa. He'd just finished his live segment, and fortunately, the crowd was able to provide him some distraction. But now, now he was all alone again and he was suffocating from the thought of Randy's revelation. Him and Al hooked up. _Him and Al hooked up. _

God, was that why Alyssa looked off today? Because she was guilty?

"Fuck!" John groaned. He punched the wall right beside his locker room door before walking in.

He sat down, feeling like his knees would unbuckle at any minute.

Damn it. He knew something was wrong. He knew there was something hidden in her smile. He'd been away from her for months, but her smile was tattooed to memory. The one she had now was definitely not the one he remembered.

John dropped his head into his hands and sighed. He didn't know what hurt most: the fact that she hooked up with Randy or the fact that she was hiding it from him. Which was more unforgivable?

A knock came to his door before he contemplated an answer. By the time he looked up, Alyssa was already standing in front of him. She'd mumbled something, but his senses had blocked it off.

His heart was ripping to pieces at the simple sight of her. He envisioned Randy's lips on hers, Randy's hands all over her, Randy's name escaping her. He couldn't stop the images from coming even as Alyssa made her way closer. He flinched when she reached for him.

Perplexed, she retracted her hand like she'd touched a burning stove. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," he lied. He didn't know what else to say. He didn't know what to do. His whole world had turned upside down today.

Alyssa cupped his cheek and leaned down to kiss him.

The scariest part for John was he felt nothing. _Nothing._

She studied his face once more. Her obliviousness was slowly melting away. "What's wrong?"

John took her hands away from him without saying a word. He got up from his seat and stepped away from her.

Alyssa struggled to suppress her panic to this. "John, what's wrong?"

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "Alyssa, you don't wanna do this right now."

"Do what?" She hugged herself, but it didn't provide the comfort she was after, not in the slightest bit.

Stinging silence hung over the air. Seconds passed, a minute, who knows. The both of them completely lost measure of time.

"John, can please talk to me?" Alyssa knew something was wrong. Terribly wrong. He never acted like this.

He stared at the ground. When she stepped forward, he stepped back.

"You've changed." The words were out before she could stop them, but what else was she supposed to say? He wasn't giving her much to work with.

"Changed? I've changed?" John couldn't bite his tongue any longer. Despite the fact that he still couldn't wrap his head around the situation; despite the fact that his heart was shattering to pieces; despite the fact that he still didn't know what to do, he knew he finally had to speak up. "Alyssa, I came back from Europe more in love with you than I was even before I left. I come home and Randy tells me you guys hooked up. Do you really expect me to be the same after that?"

Tension quickly filled the room. Alyssa epitomized a statue as John's words reverberated over and over in her head. Damn it. Why couldn't she speak up? All the words she's ever known suddenly deserted her.

Her muteness only triggered John's fuse. He let out an exasperated breath before bringing a shaky hand to his mouth. He continued to stare at her, and when she still didn't say anything, he shook his head and dropped his hand.

"_Now _you don't wanna talk?" John pursed his lips together in disappointment.

More time lapsed and the shift between them continued. The space was growing wider and wider.

John dropped his head in defeat and walked away, leaving her all alone in his locker room.

It took awhile for her to regain her senses, but once she did, it took her even longer to move.

What the fuck just happened? She didn't know how to make sense of this. Her and John were fine one minute and now they were in complete shambles.

Desperate for some resolution, she soon found herself knocking on Randy's door. It opened and all the aggression busted out of her.

Alyssa pushed him, forcing him to step backwards. He put up both hands in defense.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's going on?"

"What's going on?" she stepped forward, returning their proximity. Fire had settled underneath her skin, and she was fuming. Her ears were pounding, her heart was racing, and as much as she didn't want Randy to see, she was convulsing. "You tell me what the fuck is going on."

"What are you talking about?"

"You told John we hooked up? Hell-" Alyssa put up both hands. "I don't even know what's worse. The fact that you went behind my back, said shit about that night- we promised to forget, or the fact that you lied about it."

"Al-"

"Don't Al me, Randall. We did not hook up."

"I know-"

"Then why does John think we did?" Alyssa's glare burned into him.

He couldn't utter a single sound.

"We didn't hook up, Randy. You forced me." Alyssa's voice was barely audible now. The words that came out of her mouth had nearly choked her.

Horror settled in Randy's orbs. He'd never been so guilty in his entire life. "I'm sorry."

Alyssa closed her eyes and when she opened them again, she was tearing up. "Why? Why would you do this?"

"I don't know. I fucked up. I guess I did it to make myself feel better… to remind me that I have you. Because you- you're the only thing that's ever been constant in my life."

Alyssa shook her head and brushed the tears off her face. "Yeah, you're damn right I've been constant. But you know what? I'm starting to think it's only because I've been stupid enough to stay this long."

She looked at him some more, forcing him to see his destruction. She wanted him to remember just how badly he hurt her.

Randy regretfully watched as she walked away, and he knew there was nothing he could do to stop her.

Once Alyssa managed to enclose herself alone in one room, she immediately broke down. The tears that came were relentless. She cried and cried and cried. She'd lost her best friend and the love of her life in one night.

Yes, something happened that night her and Randy went to the bar. It was the worst night of her life. That following morning, she willed herself to forgive and to forget, thinking it would be best. She never fathomed that decision would turn to jeopardize her and John.

Now, Alyssa's world stopped, and she didn't know how it would ever start again.


	14. That's Just the Way It Is

**Thank you for the reviews: Lauren, Hi14 x, 1222mercedes1222, awesomeone21, therealchamps, my time is now, and cena's baby doll. I apologize for the longer wait; college got in the way. Enjoy everybody! **

* * *

Randy stared at the closed door, feeling himself dwindle. Never in his entire life had he seen Alyssa so mad, and this was all his fault. His sick mind had stretched the ugly truth and caused damaged.

Why'd he do it? It was simple: Alyssa was his only true source of happiness.

And damn him for wanting desperately to claim it.

At the time, when he was talking to John, he didn't see the issue in lying. All he was thinking was about was communicating his feelings for Alyssa. After all, actions speak louder than words, and Randy thought that by saying they hooked up, those actions - although false- would somehow confess things he was having trouble saying. It's clear now that he'd gone the cowardly route. Not to mention, he completely betrayed Alyssa in the process.

Not only did she forgive him for what he'd done to her that night, but now he'd gone behind her back and lied about it. But what else was he supposed to do? How else was he supposed to admit the feelings he'd been denying himself? He told Alyssa all of his secrets, until she became one of them. And now, the secret was still not out and the situation was even worse.

Randy continued staring at the closed door. His heart was twisting through crazy palpitations, because unlike their previous fights, he knew she wasn't going to come back.

* * *

_Alyssa woke up in panic. The worst part: the nightmare was her reality. She looked beside her and there Randy was: naked._

_The contents of last night was unbelievable, like a horrid crime report from someone else's life. Randy was drunk. He was more drunk than he'd ever been in his entire life. It was a surprise he even made it to bed. And like the good best friend Alyssa was, she looked after him and slept beside him like she'd done a myriad of times before. She, too, fell asleep and in the middle of the night, he was suddenly on top of her. She resisted him, and resisted him, and resisted him. But despite his inebriation, he was still far too strong to fight._

_She remembered crying and him suppressing her sobs with his lips. She remembered him pinning her wrists together as he pulled off her pants. She remembered pleading with him to stop up until he rammed himself into her. She remembered that much, and everything else, she'd pulled away from consciousness. She doesn't remember how she got through the rest of night. She doesn't remember how it ended. She doesn't remember when and how she fell asleep. All she knows is, Randy had gone somewhere he wasn't supposed to go._

_And now, all she wanted was to forget everything. She wanted desperately to blur every bit of it. Unfortunately, the tension in her body, the bruises on her skin, and the piercing ache in between her legs could not be wiped away. The evidence would remain no matter how hard she forced herself to forget._

_Alyssa let out a ragged breath. What the hell was she supposed to do now?_

_She looked beside her again and nearly jumped._

_Randy was intently staring at her. Jesus, how long had he been doing that?_

_She opened her mouth, but closed it as soon as she realized she had nothing to say. She watched as Randy's eyes traveled along her naked back, wondering what wild implications he was piecing in his head. The discomfort she felt under his gaze lingered even after he looked away to examine his own nakedness._

_Alyssa closed her eyes, her skin prickling as she did. The absolute worst part of all this: he probably doesn't remember what he did._

_"Al-" Randy spoke. The simple sound of his voice was enough to make her flinch._

_"Randy, please." She opened her eyes and dared bravely to look him in the face. "Just- can we just forget about all this?"_

_He studied her orbs and began to nod. He didn't quite understand what he was agreeing to but from the looks of it, he was being asked to keep a secret. And then, he noticed the bruises on her arms. Horror set in on his face, and he knew, he knew what he'd done._

_Alyssa wrapped the blanket more securely around herself and got off the bed. She began gathering her clothes. Her whole body shook. It felt impossible to be composed, to be comfortable in her own skin, to feel safe. It's like she'd been stripped in front of the whole world and was handcuffed to a post for everyone to see. In some aspects, what happened to her last night was even worse. Her own best friend had done this to her._

_She closed her eyes and tightened her grip on the fabric that covered her. She turned back around to face Randy, desperate to free herself from these memories, desperate to move on. "I'm gonna get dressed in the bathroom, then go."_

_All he could do was nod. He felt like scum._

_Alyssa dragged her feet across the room and inched further and further away from him. Before she completely disappeared from view, she looked at her best friend once more. "Promise me we won't ever speak of this."_

_"I promise," he answered without thought. What happened last night had barely processed in his head; he really didn't know what to say. He could barely keep up._

_Alyssa forced what appeared to be a smile, but after years of knowing her, Randy knew it couldn't mask the fact that she was a different person now._

* * *

"You must be happy you finally got what you wanted."

Randy, minding his own business at catering, angled his head to the side. He arched an eyebrow. "What?"

"Nothing. I think your sandwich is ready," John smirked. He grabbed a can of red bull before heading towards the first register.

Completely detached, Randy shook his head and got his food. Six o'clock was far too early to be awake, and although this was nothing new, he still couldn't deal with the fact that his friendship with Alyssa was in ruins. He woke up, remembering instantly what had transpired, only to wish he hadn't. He'd gone from being a married man to a divorced man. And now, he'd gone from having Alyssa by his side to not having her at all. How the hell was he supposed to deal now?

He numbed himself mentally as he walked to his car. This was just another day at work, and if that's all he focused on, he just might survive. But no matter how hard he tried to _not_ think, he found himself constantly searching for Alyssa's face. He kept seeing her, but he knew it was just his subconscious trying to deal with the fact that she would be no where near him.

Randy got to his car and saw the clock read 6:26. It'd only been 26 minutes since he opened his eyes this morning, but it might as well been eternity. Time always stood still when all you wanted was for it to pass.

Meanwhile, John was on his way back to his hotel room. Thankfully for him, work wasn't until the house show later that night. He actually preferred this newly found solitude. He didn't feel the need for any type of company and being in Australia for months definitely prepped him for it. He could be alone forever, and he wouldn't give a shit.

He hummed along the hallway but was immediately silenced once he saw Alyssa propped up against his door. His heart sunk to his stomach and all the pretending of feeling okay went down with it.

John stood perfectly still, not daring to move an inch closer. He almost wanted to turn around and run away, but unfortunately, she'd already seen him. Her muscles appeared to be much stiffer, and her eyes looked swollen.

"John-" she stepped towards him, and he stepped back.

Why was she trying to further salt the open wounds? He didn't see the point in this. He didn't need to hear her say she'd betrayed him by hooking up with Randy then betrayed him again by hiding it. Sorry would not change anything. Sorry would not fill the gaping hole.

"John-"

He put up his free hand while his other gripped tighter around his canned drink. "Alyssa, I don't wanna do this right now."

"But John-" Her eyes were desperately pleading.

He tried to step around her, daring not to look in her burning gaze again.

But she blocked him. When she spoke, her voice was much more whole. "Look, I'm well aware I missed to tell you something-"

John shook his head and chuckled. "You think?"

"Why are you being such an ass about it?" She narrowed her eyes, and suddenly, the atmosphere grew cold.

"An ass? I'm being an ass?" John pointed at himself with a smirk on his face. Truth of the matter was, he just couldn't be around Alyssa. It hurt too much, and the last thing he wanted was to be engulfed in that pain.

"First of all, we weren't even together. And second of all, you're the one that kept Randy from knowing about us for all these months."

John's patience grew thin. All the blood rushed to his head and his ears began to pound. "You really gonna use that 'not together' card? You and I both know that's complete bullshit. And what does Randy knowing even have to do with anything? Would that have changed what happened?"

Alyssa knew that was a rhetorical question, but yes. It would've changed _everything_. Alyssa wanted so badly to tell him that, but just like last night, she couldn't utter a single response. She was choking in her own words, sinking into horrid thoughts. If Randy knew about them, maybe he wouldn't have touched her. Maybe he would've never put his hands on her. Maybe she wouldn't have blotched patches on her skin or a sore back or have a splitting ache in between her legs. Maybe she would still have John.

"And you know what Alyssa, for some time, you didn't wanna tell Randy either. So don't even point the finger at me."

"But why'd you hesitate to tell him even after I told you that everything would be okay? That he'd accept it?"

"Why? Who cares about the whys," John shrugged. To hell with reasons. To hell with excuses. He just wanted to move on. "But just to get things straight, I was never after Randy's approval."

Alyssa crossed her arms, her lips stiff. "Then why'd you wait so long to tell him?"

When John didn't provide an answer, she did. "Because you had so little faith and you were scared that he'd fuck us up."

He still said nothing.

"Well, guess what John, we got fucked up anyways."

John slowly nodded his head, as if giving it some thought. "No, you're absolute right. We're fucked, and that's just the way it is. I gotta go."

John tried to move around her, but she stopped him again. Her eyes were back to pleading. John couldn't believe how quickly this conversation kept turning; it was getting hard to keep up. All sorts of emotions were cursing through him when all he wanted was to feeling nothing.

"John-"

"Alyssa, please." He looked her straight in the eye. "At least let one of us be honest: you broke my heart, and I don't want anything to do with it anymore."

John then successfully got around her. He slipped into his room so fast, he didn't notice how quick Alyssa broke right back down.

* * *

Alyssa found herself in tears later again that night. Whenever she was alone, like right now in her hotel room, she was in shambles. Without John, it was impossible to not slip away in her sorrows. It's like she had the winning ticket to the lottery and then she lost it. Except with this, she lost something way more valuable than cash. She lost the only true love she ever had.

_"I just don't wanna fuck this up so…I'm going a little slow."_

John's words began to haunt her.

_"You're the only one I don't mind walking in silence with. We don't have to talk to make time worth it."_

He was right: they didn't have to talk to make time worth it. They didn't have to do anything. As long as they were together, that was all that mattered.

_"If you feel uncomfortable with us being a secret, just let me know. I'll go tell the whole world right now."_

But damn it, why? Why didn't they tell the whole world?

"_Don't hesitate with every step you take. I'm not gonna let you fall."_

And that was it: Alyssa never hesitated with John. She had these predisposed beliefs that whatever happened, he would still be there.

_"Good, bad, rich, poor, I'll take it all. I want you, Alyssa, every single bit of you."_

And how about the bit of her who kept a secret from him? Was that the exception? Every single bit of her was shattered to pieces now.

"_If we really are gonna build this future together, we have to know these things to better understand each other."_

But there was no future now, was there?

An involuntary sob escaped Alyssa's throat and more memories of them came flittering in her head: that first night when he hugged her in Randy's balcony, being his date at the Hall of Fame and how he tried everything to tame her nerves, the day he flew back from Australia to visit her, making love to him the first and second time, his dimples and the way he would always hold her and tell her that everything would be alright.

But everything would not be alright. She had lost John, and he didn't want her anymore.

Alyssa was so immersed in her sobs, she almost didn't hear the vigorous knocking on her door. She hurriedly brushed the tears off her face in the hopes that John would show up. That John would take her back. She got on her feet and opened the door.

"Please give me a chance-"

Alyssa nearly slammed the door back shut, but the man in front of her halted it. How the hell did he find her, anyway?

"Please, Al. Let me fix this." Randy pleaded.

"You can't! Okay, you can't!" Alyssa couldn't hold back the tears. There was no way Randy could bring John back to her.

If John didn't even want to listen to her, if he didn't even want to give her the chance, what more with Randy? She was in a losing battle. The world was slipping away and the emptiness inside her expanded.

John was really gone. He'd given up on her.

Randy was suddenly at her side, pulling her into a hug. She didn't even care anymore. The worst had come, and what Randy had done- the raping and the lying- melted into insignificance now. She just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. Her sobs muffled against Randy's shirt, and the warmth she felt from his touch offered no valid solace at all.

Outside, stood John. He wanted to kick himself for being surprised by what he saw. He actually thought Alyssa would be alone. But of course, just like it'd been this whole time, Randy was right there with her.


	15. Why Didn't You Tell Me?

**Yay! Here's an early update, since I took so long with the last one. I want to thank those who reviewed: Hi14 x, Cena's baby doll, 1222mercedes1222, slasherfilmfan, awesomeone21, GlamaHart32, therealchamps, and my time is now. You guys are amazing! I smile at every single review, and it means a lot that you guys take the time to give me feedback. I hope you all enjoy this chapter.**

* * *

The past few days have been a strenuous pattern: work, cry, maybe eat, and maybe sleep. Alyssa couldn't believe how easily she'd burst in tears and how John haunted her even during sleep. She hadn't seen nor talked to him for a few days, but it helped that she hadn't been around Randy either.

Tonight she was out with the girls. The distraction it brought, albeit not much, was definitely welcomed. Alyssa found herself laughing for the first time, and it felt refreshing. There were sporadic times John popped up in her head, since nearly everything could remind her of him, but it went away as quickly as it came.

Right before she delved herself into the alcohol, one of the divas fully grabbed her attention. "Hey, you know who seems like they're back to their senses?"

"Who?" another one of the divas asked.

"I mean…not that it's a good thing or anything, but John. He seems to be back on with the ladies."

Alyssa, holding her first drink in hand, immediately set the glass down and stared off in space. She suddenly didn't feel like consuming alcohol anymore. She already felt the headache. _Back on with the ladies? What?_

"Yeah, I noticed he stopped hooking up with girls before Australia, but he looks like he's back at it. Either Australia got him really deprived or really interested."

All the women laughed and slurred at this comment. None of them seemed to notice the internal affect this had on Alyssa, who was beginning to feel herself slip away again.

_Shit._ _No. Not here, not in public_.

Alyssa's surroundings began to blur and the sounds blended into the distance. She frantically looked around, wondering if this comment about John hooking up came out of left field or from actually witnessing it. As she searched the bar, she saw no traces of him.

Okay. Maybe it's not true, Alyssa thought to herself. She managed to squirm out of her seat, without anyone's notice, to head towards the restroom.

On the way there, she noticed a man leaning against the wall as if waiting for someone to get out of the ladies room. She blinked him into focus and realized it was John. _Crap_. Right as he turned to look at her, she blinked again. It wasn't John. Damn it. Why was her mind doing these nasty tricks on her?

She shook her head and walked hastily into the restroom. Setting her clutch on the counter, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

_You broke my heart, and I don't want anything to do with it anymore._

The last thing John said to her echoed in her head, and by now, she'd repeated it at least a hundred times. As ironic as it was, hearing this now made her feel a little better. It meant that somehow, he was going after something he did want. And by all means, if he wants those other women, then so be it. There was nothing she could do.

In contrary, hearing his last line also made her feel a lot worse. It only amplified her devastation over the fact that John had really left her.

Alyssa opened her eyes again. The once near-empty restroom was now filled with more people. She took her clutch and headed towards the exit. Her friends started their rounds of shots; she figured none of them would really notice her absence anyway.

As soon as she was outside, the wind hit her face, and it sent chills down her spine. Normally, she loved this feeling, but right now, it only served as a reminder of how extra cold her days and nights have been. This gust of air matched the feeling in her heart, and as she walked further and further, the void continued to expand.

By the time she made it back to her hotel room, she felt herself breaking again. Rape, she could handle. Evidently, all she needed to do to move on was to forget. But John, John was proving to be much harder to forget- much harder to ignore or deny. For someone who never saw love in her future, she was finding it extremely difficult to see beyond the days without it.

By forcing herself to forget what Randy did, by generating herself to deny the most traumatic event in her life- she lost the love of her life. A part of her was hoping that John would still stick around, that he'd still stay. But it became clear to her that a relationship built on secrets could simply not exist.

* * *

The extra warmth provided to John tonight was making sleep impossible. Just three months ago, he'd tossed and turn all night for not having someone to sleep with; more specifically, for not having Alyssa to sleep with. Now, he'd gotten used to sleeping alone, and the naked blonde next to him was obviating him further from solace. This forced John to scratch his head. Why'd he bring her back to his room again? The last few nights he'd gone to the bar, he got _well_ acquainted with new faces. It wasn't until tonight he actually decided to run all the bases. But it was Alyssa's fault. If he hadn't seen her at the bar, he would've never thought of taking in another woman. But just like the last time he saw Alyssa, his emotions went havoc, and now he was with some nameless female.

"Baby, are you okay?"

John titled his head to the side as warm flesh went up against his own.

"You wanna go for round two?" she smiled.

He looked at her skeptically, nausea quickly permeating him. She was an amazing woman in bed, no doubt, but he was beginning to question what the hell he'd gotten himself into. He didn't want this. He definitely didn't want this. Broken-hearted or not, he no longer found interest in one night stands. Ever since Alyssa, sex had become something much more. And frankly, as beautiful as this girl beside him was, she was still nothing compared to Alyssa.

John closed his eyes, his insides crumbling further as he did. Not only was he questioning the presence of the naked stranger beside him, he was also dithering over Alyssa yet again. This was definitely not his most productive night.

"John, baby, come on. You look like you could use another ride of your life." She licked her lips as her orbs flashed with arousal and desire.

John quickly opened his eyes, and when he did, she was on top of him. Instead of telling her to stop, he surrendered himself to his body and used his lips to kiss her instead.

* * *

"I could just stay home forever," Alyssa mumbled.

Three weeks had gone by since things ended with John, and they were the longest three weeks of her life. Somehow, it felt even longer than the three months John spent in Australia. Thankfully, she managed to fully immerse herself into work, which provided her the needed distraction as well as these extra days off. It was officially time to build herself up again.

After first hearing about John hooking up, she fell into a phase of denial. She refused to believe he was interested in random girls; or rather, in some ring-rat rebounds. It wasn't until last week when she caught him walking a blonde along the hotel hallways when she finally admitted to herself that he had, in fact, moved on. They were officially history.

And now, it was time for her to move on as well. She'd already taken the first step by telling Randy to back the hell off. He'd begged and pleaded, a myriad of times, through various forms: voicemails, flowers, letters. After continually responding with silence, he finally got the point that, if he wanted to ever be friends again, he needed to give her some space.

Alyssa settled herself on the couch and looked around her living room. The white furniture with accents of red brought liveliness to her eyes. For the first time, in a long time, she was beginning to feel rejuvenated.

"Life without men." She smiled a small smile. She wasn't sure if it was a forced one or not, but that didn't matter much. "I've done this once, I can do it again."

* * *

It seemed that every time he saw Alyssa, John broke off from his robotic tendencies to crumble back into a shattered state. That theory hadn't been tested in awhile, and as crazy as it was, John was beginning to miss it. He hadn't seen her for weeks, and it confused the hell out of him. He didn't want to see her, but when he didn't, all he thought about was their next possible encounter. Every time he found himself alone- turning a corner, ordering dessert, getting into his car- he wondered if she'd end up at the same place. She never did. It's like she disappeared off the face of the earth while simultaneously remaining inert in his heart. Her total absence, John learned, was the heaviest blow to endure.

All hopes of seeing her finally boiled over one night. John was taking his nightly rounds at the bar when Randy appeared with women in both arms. As much as she was the reason for his broken heart, John couldn't help but still feel overprotective. So, fractious and slightly buzzed, John sauntered over to diatribe. "Orton, what the hell are you doing with these girls, huh? What the hell is Alyssa gonna think, huh?"

Randy, looking perplexed, took his arms off the two women. "Are you drunk?"

"Eh, no! And that's not important," John slurred. "What the hell you doin? Where's Alyssa?"

"She went home," Randy stated zealously. He glanced apologetically at his company.

John's blinked his eyes, and suddenly, his senses were sharper. It's like all the alcohol slipped out of his body. Alyssa went home? Randy's with other girls and not her? This was news to him.

"You're drunk, man. Take it easy." Randy patted John's shoulder before taking the two women away with him. It'd been awkward between them for awhile, the true reasons unbeknownst to both, and Randy knew this encounter only happened because of alcohol. After getting drunk the last time and doing what he did, he promised to avoid any association with drinks. His life was much simpler that way.

Meanwhile, John stood stunned and all he could think about was which way would get him back to his hotel room the fastest. He no longer wanted to be at the bar, he no longer wanted to drink, he no longer wanted to pick up random girls. He just wanted to lay in bed. And for once, he wanted to sleep alone and sober.

* * *

Day two of being home was proving to be a good one. Alyssa kept herself busy running errands and now she was back in her driveway with groceries. It'd been awhile since she last had a home cooked meal and boy was she looking forward to tonight. It'd be dinner for one, but who needs company when you have good food?

She hauled all the groceries out of her trunk and when she turned to slam the door, someone else had pulled up to her driveway.

"Whatta-" Alyssa's eyes traveled from the back of the car all the way to the driver's window. Her mouth dried instantly when John stepped out of the car. She nearly dropped the bags.

"Hey, you need help with that?" John made his way towards her.

"Um, I- uh-" Alyssa stammered, wondering how the hell he managed to sound so casual.

Before she managed to fully formulate a sentence, John took the groceries from her hands and into his own. She shifted her eyes from it to his face and realized he looked even more handsome than she remembered. How did he still have this affect on her?

Instead of saying anything, Alyssa forced a smile before leading him into her house. She couldn't fathom where this was going.

"Kitchen counter alright?" John asked.

"Uh, yeah."

Alyssa crossed her arms as John settled the bags against the marble. His eyes traveled around the kitchen before finally settling on her face. The island in between them kept some distance.

"I apologize for coming without notice. I just didn't want some phone call to be our form of communicating."

Alyssa nodded. She still didn't see where this was going; the expression on his face was hardly readable. He just looked…good. He was dressed in a black button up with the sleeves rolled below his elbows, and he paired it with dark jeans and black shoes. John barely ever wore pants and it made Alyssa wonder what else had changed about him. She parted her lips, but words failed to follow.

"So, how have you been?" he freely spoke.

Alyssa uncrossed her arms and ran a hand through her hair. She thought she was doing fine, but his presence made her question it all over again. "Well, I've been home and holding up."

John's eyes burrowed deeper into hers. He was carefully assimilating her answer before providing his own. "I'd be lying if I told you I was doing okay."

There was a sudden shift in the atmosphere, and Alyssa didn't know if she could handle it. Their physical proximity was overwhelming enough; talking about their feelings might just push her over the edge.

"I'd also be lying if I told you, you haven't been on my mind."

Alyssa closed her eyes; looking into his was making her feel winded.

"Alyssa, please." His voice was filled with need and desperation.

When she opened her eyes again, her heart rate shot up the roof. His casual stare was replaced with a look of helplessness, and it was breaking her heart. "John- I-I don't know what to tell you."

"Help me understand," he begged. "What happened to us?"

His question stung. It almost felt like a slap in the face. "It's not what you think."

"Then what was it? Tell me. Help me make sense of everything again."

"John-I- I don't know. It's just not what you think."

"Then what?" He was almost losing patience. "Was it the heat of the moment? Was it something you two have been wanting to do? Was it something you regret? What was it, Alyssa?"

She briefly closed her eyes. All the strength she'd mustered up the last 24 hours disappeared and tears began to brim her lashes. "It's something I wanna forget. That's why I didn't tell you, John, because I just wanna forget everything."

She looked away. Her lips were beginning to tremble- hell, every part of her was beginning to tremble.

John couldn't ignore the way her body was reacting, and it took every bit of him to resist holding her right then and there. But he still didn't understand. She still wasn't telling him everything- or anything- but at least she was finally talking.

When she looked at him again, tears were freely rolling down her cheeks. And when she spoke, her voice cracked. "I just wanna forget everything."

John swallowed, but it did nothing to pacify his racing heart. The love of his life was breaking right in front of him. Where did they go wrong?

He curled his fingers in, then suddenly, the past invaded his memory.

_"Remember when he tried to kiss you?"_

She took awhile to respond when he'd asked her, and it was now becoming clear to him the things Alyssa didn't want to remember.

"_Has he tried anything?"_

_"John, if he did, I would've told you already. Don't you know that?"_

Yes, he knew that. He knew Alyssa would never blatantly hide anything from him. He also knew she did everything possible to cover up for Randy.

John, piecing together the facts, stared at her in horror. He was almost afraid to ask. "Alyssa, did he rape you?"

When she only stared, all hell inside of him broke loose. The resentment, the bitterness, the hurt: all melted into insignificance and was replaced with sorrow and anger.

John was at Alyssa's side within seconds. He cradled her into his arms, feeling broken and whole at the same time.

She sobbed against him, instantly dampening his black shirt. It's like a dam had been broken. Finally.

John's heart raced as he tightened his grip on her. He went back and forth between wanting to kill Randy and wanting to never let Alyssa go. He waited until her sobs calmed down before taking a look at her tear-stricken face. Using his thumbs, he wiped the moistness out of her cheeks.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he whispered.

"Because I was scared." She was still crying. "I was scared to remember that night. I was scared to hear myself talk about what happened to me. I was scared you wouldn't accept that I forgave him. I-I don't know. I was just petrified and I thought if I pretended it never happened, I could avoid having to deal with those fears."

John pushed their foreheads together, desperate to draw out any strength he could for the both of them. His heart was breaking. Nothing, absolutely nothing, had ever hurt this much.

"John, I never intentionally tried to hide anything from you. For myself, I just- I didn't want to remember what happened. But now I realize that was selfish of me, and I just fucked everything up."

"Baby, no, don't say that. I understand, okay? Please don't cry. Please."

John pulled her back into his arms. Nasty images flashed through his head: Randy using force on her, her crying herself to sleep, her being all alone, her not knowing what to do. He swore to himself that he'd never let her feel that way again.

"Shhh." He gently rocked her. "Don't worry, baby. Everything's gonna be okay. I'm here now."

John waited a few more seconds before pulling away. He used his thumb to wipe away more of her tears. "We'll make this work."

She simply nodded her head, and for the first time, John saw her form a real smile.

He smiled back, and something inside of him knew that the worst had come and gone. They were back in each other's lives again.


	16. Melanie

**It's 4 o'clock in the morning and I have class in a few hours. Apparently, I love busting my ass to get these chapters out for you guys. I hope you all enjoy!**** And as always, I would like to give a special thanks for those who reviewed: therealchamps, 1222mercedes1222, my time is now, GlamaHart32, awesomeone21, Cena's baby doll, Hi14 x, and Bingobaby.**

* * *

"If I had known I wasn't going to have dinner alone, I would've bought more chicken."

John, who was absentmindedly strumming his fingers against the marble countertop , barely reacted to Alyssa's comment. He was too busy ruminating over Randy that he missed to notice Alyssa intently staring at him.

"John, are you okay?"

"Huh? What?" he snapped out of his daze and looked at her blankly.

There was complete silence.

"Are you sure you don't wanna help make dinner?"

John, getting up from the stool to stand beside her, smiled. He then leaned down and kissed her lips softly. Although this wasn't their first today, it still instantly sated his racing heartbeat. "I'd love to help. What do you want me to do?"

"Well," Alyssa pushed the plate full of bread crumbs in front of him then followed it with the plate of raw scrambled eggs. It sloshed over on the counter, but she ignored it. "First, stop thinking about whatever you're thinking about."

John's eyes shifted from the counter to her face. For a moment, he wasn't thinking about Randy or what he'd done or what he'd do to him. His mind was at a standstill.

"Second, dip a chicken breast into the eggs, coat it with bread crumbs, then fry. I'll go ahead and start making the sauce for the pasta."

She left his side to pull a pot from the lower cupboards and John immediately reverted to thoughts of Randy. When she returned, he was idly standing still.

"John-" Alyssa set the pot on the counter. The noisy contact of metal to marble wasn't enough to distract John from his bogged thoughts.

"I'm sorry." He turned to her, his eyes soft. "I'm just having a hard time processing all of this."

"I know you are, but we have each other again. That's all that matters." She reached up to cup his cheek, and he gladly let her cradle it. But when he still didn't say anything, she frowned. "What would make you feel better?"

"I want answers. I don't know." He shrugged and pulled away from her hand. The thumping in his chest was getting harder again. "How could that bastard do something to you then lie to my face about it? Why the hell-"

As soon as Alyssa's eyes fell to the floor, John immediately stopped talking. The anger cursing through him froze and was gradually replaced with a sense of guilt. He stared at her frown, willing himself to get it together. He then lifted her face up with his two fingers. "I'm sorry. This is probably why you didn't wanna tell me."

"No, John." She shook her head and tried to smile. "It'd be selfish of me to expect you to feel okay about what happened. You have the right to feel mad, and I cant deny you of those emotions. Don't worry about me. It's just, I don't know how to give you answers to those questions."

John leaned closer, amazed at how strong this woman was being. "It's not your job to, so please, don't feel responsible. Thank you, but I really don't wanna make it any harder on you."

"John, like I said, don't worry about me. I have you again and that's all that ever mattered."

His eyes lingered on hers and suddenly, he found himself smiling. He tucked some loose hair behind her ear before using his fingers to trace the contour of her jaw. The warmth from her skin was comforting. He'd been deprived of that feeling for awhile now so this was refreshing. He was always a better man whenever Alyssa was around. "I fuckin' missed you."

She giggled at his profanity. She'd always been drawn to the thuganomics in him. "I've missed you too, John."

He watched her bite her bottom lip. Despite the fact that she was crying just an hour ago, evident through the puffiness under her eyes, she looked like the happiest person on earth. Not a hint of sadness was present in her orbs, and John was convinced she was even more beautiful than the last time he saw her. "I think I still remember where your room is."

She narrowed her eyes, smiling deviously at him. "Did you just invite yourself, Cena?"

"I did," he smiled proudly. "Want me to take you there?"

When she responded by simply holding her smile, he gladly swept her off her feet and placed her over his shoulders. Suddenly, the quiet house was filled with her laughter. It traveled everywhere that he led her: out of the kitchen, through the living room, into the hallway.

She gasped for air in between giggles and tried to get some words out. "John! The food! What about the food?"

Ignoring her question, he barreled his way to the bedroom then set her down gently. The sheets were much softer than he expected and it was a pleasant surprise. Complete darkness enclosed them, but neither of them cared. All they cared about was each other.

John leaned down to kiss her as she frantically unfastened the buttons on his shirt. When she freed him of it, she wrapped her legs around his torso, bringing him even closer. He willingly indulged the softness of her skin and her sweet lavender scent. The heat in between them was amplifying. The only sounds in the room was their ragged breathing and the small moans permeating Alyssa's throat. John's touch was driving her crazy and her center was continuing to heat as he snaked his hand to completely undress her.

"I love you," he mumbled against her lips. "I'm about to show you I never stopped."

Alyssa felt herself sink deeper onto the mattress. Her muscles were liquefying. She was losing her breath, but she knew this man was going to sate every single thing she's ever wanted.

So far, this was already going better than their first time.

* * *

Alyssa stretched her arms over her head and chuckled. "Ah, nothing like coming back to work early."

The sterile smell and dull paint in the arena wasn't making her feel welcome at all. Thankfully, the man beside her was enough to spruce some excitement. After all, he was the sole reason for her early return. John had asked her to come on the road with him, and despite having two more days off work, she said yes. The two couldn't possibly keep away from each other.

"Thank you for coming, baby." John's eyes gleamed. Having her around made a significant difference in his otherwise banal routine.

Instead of replying verbally, she simply winked at him.

John patted the cold plastic he sat on. "Come sit next to me."

She scrunched her nose and shook her head. "We've been sitting the past few hours. I need some circulation. Besides, I should probably find Vince and let him know I'm here."

John frowned. "I take you to work and you leave me as soon as you get the chance?"

"Oh, John, don't be so dramatic." Alyssa playfully rolled her eyes. "Besides, you gotta leave for your match soon. I'll be back before you know it."

"Okay but make it soon. I miss you already."

"Yes sir!" she answered energetically, a big smile on her face. She leaned down to kiss him and as soon as their lips made contact, Alyssa heard someone call out her name. She stood straight in response and looked to where the voice came from.

About ten feet away was a pale Randy.

Before Alyssa was able to process his presence, John was already on his feet. Both of his hands automatically formed fists.

"You guys are going out?" Randy asked. Other than the crinkle in between his eyebrows, there was no trace of emotion on his face.

John opened his mouth to talk, but Alyssa beat him to an answer.

"It's really none of your business," she said, her voice firm.

Hurt registered on Randy's face, but it disappeared as soon as he blinked. He was realizing just how little shock he felt about all this. He should've known. It was obvious. They were obvious.

Randy's eyes stayed on Alyssa even as she looked away to look at John. The both of them began to walk away without even bothering to give Randy a second glance. And for some reason, for him, this felt even worse than when Sam walked away from him.

* * *

There was more bounce in her step, and Alyssa knew this was all because of John. She smiled as she distanced herself further and further away from Vince McMahon's office. Their talk went well; it wasn't as strenuous as usual by a mile. He simply acknowledged her return but said there was no work for her to do until later. Surely, Alyssa wasn't complaining. This meant that she'd have more quality time with John.

She hummed along the hallway of the arena but stopped when a pair of high heels started clicking behind her. Curious, she turned her head and was met by an unfamiliar brunette.

"Oh, hi!" The brown haired woman walked up to her and smiled.

"Hey, do I know you?" Alyssa fully faced the stranger.

"Oh, no. My name's Stacy. I'm new around here; I just got hired a few days ago."

"Oh, really?" Alyssa titled her head at an angle. She wasn't aware the WWE was looking for a new employee. "Well, congratulations, Stacy. It's nice to meet you."

The brunette held a proud smile. "Nice to meet you too. And your name is?"

"Alyssa."

"Alyssa," Stacy repeated. She held out her hand, forcing Alyssa to step closer to reach her. As they shook hands, she noticed her waxy complexion. Stacy had on too much perfume and her lip liner extended beyond their natural lines.

As soon as Alyssa was able to retreat her hand, she crossed her arms and watched as her new claimed coworker sauntered down the hallway. There was something off about her, but she just couldn't put her finger on it.

Before Alyssa was able to mull over it some more, someone else appeared in her peripheral view. She didn't have to look directly to know who it was. The buzz cut, the slenderness, and the tattoos said it all. It was Randy.

Not knowing what else to do, she turned her heel and bolted straight to another direction.

It wasn't long before Randy's voice and footsteps followed her. "Al, wait."

She took a few more steps hoping he'd give up and go away. But after years of knowing him, she'd gotten well acquainted with his persistence. So, she faced him head on. She was ready to get this over with. She turned so fast, she nearly got a whiplash. "What, Randy?"

"You and John are going out?"

Alyssa narrowed her eyes. She couldn't decide if the pounding in her ears or his question was more annoying. "What the hell does that have anything to do with you?"

"He's been sleeping around. Did you know that? He can't be doing that if you guys are really going out."

Her lips formed a tighter hyphen. Not only was this conversation an annoyance, it was starting to hurt, too. Randy salted a wound she didn't even know she had. But she wasn't going to let him know that. "Randy, this is really none of your business."

"Why, are you just another one of those girls?"

"Leave me-"

"Alyssa, he's just gonna hurt you!" he blurted out. Frustration bled deep into his voice. To say he was more deeply affected than her was an understatement.

"You don't know that," she replied steadily. Calmly. Definitely.

"And you don't either."

"I'm aware of the risk involved, okay? You have enough shit on going to be concerned about me, anyway. So please, do us both a favor and just back the fuck off." Alyssa walked away before the mounting anger got the best of her. She didn't bother looking back. And thankfully, Randy didn't stretch their departure by tailing her again. He simply let it be, and that's exactly what she was planning to do. Never again would Randy Orton control her.

* * *

Alyssa felt like a little kid peeking early at her Christmas presents. A shirtless John Cena was in front of her; it was impossible not to stare. Who could blame her? The man was built, his skin was flawless, and not to mention, his face was definitely not bad to look at.

She was sitting on the toilet with the cover down and across from her was John's bare back. He was facing the mirror for his nightly shave and the way his muscles flexed with every move was driving her crazy. The fancy upholstery, the chandelier, and the broadway lights in their hotel bathroom was barely making an impression. Her eyes were far too marinated in John to notice anything else.

"Enjoying the view back there?" John smirked. He was getting ready to rinse when he noticed, through the mirror, a pair of eyes on him.

"Oh, yes. Yes, I am."

John's shook his head disapprovingly before bending lower to splash himself with water. If it wasn't for all the foam on his face, he would've set her on the bathroom counter and had his way with her. No doubt. Fortunately, the noise from the faucet and the cold water to his face was enough to deter him from his carnal wishes. At least, for a little bit.

John turned off the running water before patting his face dry. Right when he turned, a ringing sound emitted in the distance. The both of them exchanged looks.

"That's yours," Alyssa stated, instantly recognizing his ringtone. "Want me to get it while you finish your manly duties?"

John tossed the towel and shrugged. "You don't have to, baby."

"I will. It could be important. Who knows, you might have another last minute Make-A-Wish Foundation meeting."

John watched as Alyssa got up and walked out of the room. He, too, enjoyed the view. She was in her dusty rose silk nightgown and the white lace trim was making it even harder to look away.

Alyssa shook her head once she was completely out of his view. Even without eye contact, his gaze burned deep into her. To deviate from trance, she focused on looking for his phone. When it didn't appear to be on any of fixture surfaces, she searched for his jean shorts. It hung over a swivel chair. She reached into his oversized pocket, the fabric dwarfing her hand in comparison, and pulled out its contents.

In her hands ended up to be more than what she bargained for. There was some coldness from his dog tags, as well as from the metal from his phone, but more alarming was the crumpled up piece of paper. She straightened it out, unable to fully eliminate its creases, and read the name Candy. Underneath appeared to be her phone number and a small note that said: _I had a lot of fun teaching you new tricks last night. Can't wait to do it again. Call me._

Alyssa ran through the implications. Last night, John was with her. That quickly eliminated the chances of this note being recent. It must have been from before he came back to her.

But, even with that assurance, Randy's words began to echo. _He's been sleeping around_.

This was tangible evidence. He _has_ been sleeping around. Alyssa crumpled up the piece of paper and shook her head. He _was_ sleeping around. He wasn't anymore. He was with her now. Her and only her.

She was sure of this but even that didn't keep her from remembering the very moment she caught her first boyfriend cheating on her. Finding this note in John's pocket was too much of a resemblance.

* * *

_Hunger was extremely difficult for Alyssa to endure and the fact that her own boyfriend deserted her for 'a few minutes', that magically was turning into over an hour, was making her head boil._

_"Be back after I buy a binder my ass," she hissed._

_She was in his room, and it didn't help that there was absolutely no food in his house. At the age of seventeen, she was unlike many of her schoolmates and was without a license. She didn't even have her permit yet._

_The faint drizzle outside had regretfully turned into heavy rain. She could hear the water sloshing relentlessly against the iron roofs, providing her no sense of comfort whatsoever. She was stuck. And hungry. And alone._

_"Where the hell are you?" she groaned at her absent boyfriend. She refused to give him a call; she couldn't dare being sent to voice mail for the tenth time. _

_She looked around his room and noticed the pieces of discarded clothing on the floor, random papers, controllers, and several days old plates. She was surprised she hadn't noticed the stench sooner. She was truly in a male's bedroom. __So, to distract herself from the hunger and annoyance erupting inside of her, she got up and decided to clean up. She always fancied clean rooms and since this seemed to be her extended confinement place by default, she figured she might as well do herself the favor._

_She started by scooping everything off the floor. She stacked the wrinkled pieces of paper on top of each other and set it on his desk. Then, she tackled his controllers and thanked God for wireless. This eased her right into folding his clothes. It was the part most familiar to her considering she worked for retail._

_She was mindlessly folding his shirts, boxers, and sweaters. Then, she picked up a pair of his jeans and noticed a big bulge where his pockets were sewn in. Hovering her hand over the course denim, she slipped her hand into the slit and removed the items from his pocket. She figured he forgot they were there and would want to see them. __Among the variety of objects she pulled out, one item in particular stood out. _

_Her eyes furrowed at the piece of paper at hand. She read the writing but it took much longer for the words to register in her head. She read it twice, three times, four times. Even after the fifth time, she still couldn't believe what it said: Hey babe. You are the most amazing boyfriend ever. Thank you for the flowers. Purple's my favorite color, but I see you already knew that._

_It was signed by Melanie._

_Melanie. _

_Alyssa's vision began to blur at the sight of that name. Melanie was his supposed cousin. And the purple roses she caught him with yesterday was for his supposed cousin._

_Alyssa looked up in horror as the door flew wide open. Her boyfriend walked in, with no binder in hand, and she knew immediately where he'd been and who he'd been with. Melanie._

* * *

"Baby, who was it?"

Alyssa found herself looking up simultaneously with the visions of her seventeen year old self. She simply stared, unable to bring herself back into the present fast enough.

John made his way towards her, but before he got to see, she slickly shoved the piece of paper back into his shorts.

"Oh, um, I don't know. But they left you a text message." Alyssa slid the phone onto his hand in the hopes that it'd distract him from her shaken state.

She watched him study the screen.

"How much were there in the three weeks we spent apart?" The words were out before she could stop them.

John looked up, faint light bouncing on his face from the cell phone screen. He epitomized a statue.

Alyssa blinked and her silence told John that he needed to speak up.

"Uh…just…just to make sure we're on the same page, are we talking about the women?"

Alyssa silently nodded her head.

John looked away nervously. He wasn't bothering to count; he just didn't know what to say.

Alyssa nodded her head again and shifted her weight on one foot. "That many, huh?"

"But none of them made me feel the way you do," John answered right away.

Alyssa smiled. It took a lot more effort than she expected. "I believe you. I was just wondering how many there were."

John shrugged. "It doesn't matter. None of them mattered. It was just to pass time- kinda like walking around the mall and seeing all the things for sale. You never really remember what was there unless it was something you were specifically looking for. Or something you specifically wanted. And for me, that's always been you."

A smile of satisfaction formed Alyssa's features. "Nice analogy you made there, John."

"I love you, Alyssa. I mean it." He tossed the phone on the bed to free his hands, which allowed him to nurse her cheeks with his large thumbs.

She welcomed the warmth of his touch and looked deeply into his eyes. Her heart was fluttering. "I love you, too."

And as those words escaped her lips, Alyssa hoped and prayed that with John, there would be no Melanie.

* * *

**I hope the flashback brought a little more insight into Alyssa's past. There's more where that came from. What'd you guys think? Please let me know. Feedback is ALWAYS appreciated. It'll only take a few seconds to type, and it'll for sure leave a smile on my face to last the whole day. Heeeey! Haha. Until next time!**


	17. Dirty Little Secret

**Shout outs to those who left me some good feedback: therealchamps, cena's baby doll, awesomeone21, 1222mercedes1222, smash07, my time is now, Hi14 x, and Pinayprincesa. Thank you to you wonderful people! Enjoy everyone :)**

* * *

A naked John Cena was wrapped around her like a vine, but still, Alyssa couldn't help but succumb to her insecurities. It was late into the night and the cold air was just beginning to creep its way into the sheets. John was fast asleep, and she was wide awake. Unfortunately, she was also falling victim to unproductive thoughts. She found herself wondering what kind of women John had been with. Did they know who he was? Were there any he found himself attracted to? Did he ever think of her when he was with them?

The questions were relentless and as the minutes ticked on, she was with even more questions and no answers. Although she knew she shouldn't be thinking about this, she couldn't stop. The curiosity was eating away at her. Yeah, John and her weren't talking at the time. He had every right to do what he did. It's not like he cheated on her. However, that still wasn't making the process of accepting any easier. Just a few nights ago, it was another woman beside John. Just a week ago, it was another woman kissing John. Just two weeks ago, it was another woman naked next to John.

These unwelcome thoughts continued to surface and all Alyssa wanted to do was to forget. Damn Randy for reminding her of what John had been doing. She was doing perfectly fine acting oblivious to those facts. After all, those facts really had nothing to do with their relationship. What happened between John and those women was none of her business.

And yet, her mind was making it all she could think about.

She cursed under her breath and sunk deeper onto the pillow. Her eyes scanned what she assumed was the ceiling. It was too dark to make out a definite view. She tried to squirm away from John's heavy mass, but his hold was too tight. Unable to move an inch, she let out a frustrated sigh. This was not how she imagined her night to be. They were in a fancy hotel suite and she was on one of the most comfortable beds she's ever laid on. Instead of having the best sleep of her life, with the best man right beside her, she was wide awake with thoughts she shouldn't even be thinking.

She continued to stare into the darkness, and before she knew it, John began shuffling around her. He moved his legs so they weren't on top of her, while his arms circled around her waist even tighter.

She titled her head to look at his face, and it was then she got the urge to massage his scalp. The warmth that exuded from his flesh provided her with warming comfort.

"Baby, go to sleep," John mumbled.

When she barely reacted, he looked over at her, trying desperately to see through the darkness.

"Why are you still up?" he asked softly.

"Mm, I just can't sleep."

Although she couldn't see, she felt more movement around the bed. John was pulling away and the warmth was quickly escaping her. Within a blink of an eye, light quickly filled the room. She squinted in response and realized he'd turned on the lamp on his side of the bed.

It didn't take long for him to return their proximity which brought back some welcomed heat to her flesh. "I'm staying up with you then."

"No, baby-" Alyssa began to protest, but John shut her up with a kiss. Their lip-lock went slow and tender. He cradled her jaw with one hand, while his opposing elbow held himself up to not crush her.

Then, John abruptly pulled away and stumped her with a question. "What were you thinking about?"

Alyssa squinted. "What?"

"What were you thinking about?" he repeated.

"I was… um…" Alyssa searched his eyes. He seemed so adamant to get into her head when all she wanted was to get out of it.

John waited a few more seconds before speaking up again. "Al, tell me."

"Why are you so nosey?" she teased. She knew she was going to tell him eventually, but she couldn't help but stall. It wasn't often she thought about her insecurities, much less talked about them with another individual.

"Because." John kissed her. "I love you." He kissed her again. "And I don't want whatever you're thinking about to keep you up ever again." He kissed her for the third time. "So, let's talk about it."

Alyssa tilted her head to the side, her cheek burrowing deeper onto the pillow. She smiled coyly as the redness surfaced her skin. "Your women."

"My women?" John raised his eyebrows. He almost wanted to laugh. "Can you tell me who they are? Because I have no idea who the hell you're talking about."

To distract herself, she looked down and began running her fingers up and down his firm biceps. "The women you were with the last three weeks. Those women. "

"Baby." John frowned. "They're not mine. They never were, and I was never theirs."

"I know, I know. I'm wasting my time thinking about this but I just- I don't know."

"No, I get it. I'd hate the thought of you with someone else, too. But I can't take back what I did and I admit, it was ugly. So please, try not to think about them for me?"

Alyssa returned her eyes to his and when she did, he gave her another kiss. This one lasted much longer.

John pulled away just enough to speak. Their nose were still touching. "I don't even think about them. I never do. So you shouldn't either."

She silently and slowly began to nod her head. It was becoming obvious to her that this was all a game of mind over matter. She shouldn't mind, because to John, they didn't matter.

"Come on, baby. Do that distraction thing you're so good at," John urged. He began to massage her arms, tenderly making his way lower and lower. As soon as his hands reached her waist, he looked at her with a different purpose. "Unless of course." He kissed her once more. "You want my help with that."

In a silent response, Alyssa smiled and snaked her hand over his buzzed scalp. She was getting ready to allow him to take over not only her body, but her mind too.

* * *

"So which girl do you remember the most?"

It was far too early for John and this question made his lips curl in disgust. "Alyssa!"

She set her toothbrush down and looked at him innocently through the mirror. "What?"

"I thought you're trying not to think about them anymore?"

"I never said that," she defended with a smile.

"Your nod said so." John wiped his mouth with a towel. "Please Al, can we just drop it? I'm not proud of what I did."

"But John," she whined. "I'm strictly curious. You know, I mean, I'm sure there were plenty of women throwing themselves at you per night, right?"

Without answering, John looked at her disapprovingly.

"Right," Alyssa answered for him. "So, you couldn't possibly have picked all of them. Some stood out, and as your woman, I'm curious to know what's your type."

"It's you. You're my type. You're my only type." John walked out of the bathroom, and she followed.

"Okay, but-"

"Wait a minute, wait a minute." He turned to face her, sandwiching her between him and the wall. It was now his turn to ask the questions. "How'd you know about them anyway?"

She shrugged zealously. "I saw you."

"You saw me?" John eyes widened with horror.

"Yes," Alyssa nodded. "With a blonde."

John dropped his head in guilt, then chucked. "Okay, okay. If you're so curious, I'll tell you this much: I tried to only get blondes."

Alyssa looked at him curiously. She never pegged him to be into blondes. "Why?"

"Because you're a brunette and I didn't wanna see my fist in brown hair."

"Interesting," she mumbled. "Well, maybe your fist shouldn't have been in anyone's hair."

John chuckled out of discomfort. He wasn't sure if she intended for it to be a joke, but either way, he knew she meant it. "I know, baby, I know. I can't believe you saw me."

"Well, thankfully, there wasn't much to see. You guys were just walking. I filled in the blanks with the rumors I heard."

"There were rumors?"

"Yeah, the girls were telling me about you. Oh, and Randy told me too."

"Randy told you?"

"Yeah, he told me yesterday," she answered casually. She didn't realize, until after she finished her sentence, what a momentous statement she just dropped. There'd been so much going on, she failed to tell John about the mini altercation.

"He told you yesterday? After he saw us?" John scrunched his eyebrows. There were about a million things that went through his head.

"Yeah, after I left Vince's office."

Unnerving silence followed.

John just stared before asking a question. "You guys still talk?"

"Oh, no, no. We don't. He was just being his over-intrusive self."

John's lips formed into a hyphen. He didn't like this one bit. "I see."

Trying to lighten the mood, Alyssa moved closer to John and settled her forearms over his chest. "Listen, let's make a deal: I'll stop thinking about the girls, and you stop thinking about Randy."

John chewed on this for a moment. It wasn't that her proposal seemed bad, he just didn't know if he could do it. Could he stop think about Randy and what he'd done? If it was for Alyssa, and if it'd help her not think about the women, maybe he could. "Okay, baby."

Alyssa tip toed and kissed him on the cheek. "Good. Let's get breakfast?"

"Let's go," John nodded with a grin.

As they left the hotel room, he ran through his last thoughts of Randy. He mentally promised he wouldn't worry about him, as long as they never ended up together alone.

* * *

Alyssa had just said bye to John when she heard the familiar clicking echoing in the backstage arena. Before the thought of turning around even crossed her mind, Stacy was already beside her.

"Hey, Alyssa!"

"Hi Stacy-"

"Isn't he just the finest piece of meat around here?"

Alyssa followed Stacy's eyes and what she saw was John's figure growing into the distance. She stared confused.

"You know he's the reason I got hired?" Stacy revealed.

"What?" Alyssa's head instantly snapped to the other's woman direction. Her confused daze was amplified.

"Yeah, he asked Vince to hire me," Stacy stated proudly.

Alyssa couldn't figure out if she was in shock or in disbelief. Either way, she found herself speechless.

Stacy leaned in closer and began to whisper as if revealing a dirty little secret. "I mean, I know they say you shouldn't mix business with pleasure, but how could you resist that with John?"

"I-uh-" Alyssa didn't bother hiding the disgruntlement in her expression. She looked at her like she was crazy.

However, Stacy didn't seem to notice. She was staring down the hallway again.

"Well, I better go. I got some work to do," Stacy smiled. She waved good-bye and walked off in the direction John had gone.

Alyssa stood stuck in her place. It felt like the walls were caving in on her.

Was Stacy full of shit or was she telling the truth? Alyssa leaned against the wall for support.

"Shit. So much for not thinking about the women."

* * *

John was happy to see Alyssa already in his locker room when he walked in, but the look on her face made him question his excitement. It wasn't her blank stare that alarmed him most, it was the way she idly stood still when he touched her.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

When only silence followed, John lowered his head so their eyes were leveled.

"Can I ask you something?" she asked, finally looking at him.

"Of course."

"Did you ask Vince to hire a new employee?"

John furrowed his eyebrows. "Hire a new employee? Why would I do that?"

"Did you?"

"No, I didn't."

"Oh," Alyssa gave his answer some thought before her face quickly registered with relief. "That's creepy, because this Stacy girl just told me you're the reason she got the job."

John looked at her quizzically "First of all, other than Keibler, I don't know anyone named Stacy. And second of all, I don't recall ever telling Vince to hire anybody. I wrestle, babe. I don't make suggestions for who has a job or not."

"Yeah," Alyssa nodded slowly. She tried to process this information but nothing was making any sense. "That's weird. I knew there was something off about her."

John shrugged. He placed both hands on her shoulders then kissed her temple. "Is that why you looked so worried?"

"Eh, yeah." She shrugged. "Looks like you got yourself a new admirer, John."

He smiled at her graciously. "You're the only one that matters."

Just as he was getting ready to lean down and kiss her, someone knocked on the door.

"Ignore it," John whispered it. He captured her lips, but the knocking grew urgent.

"Sounds important," Alyssa whispered.

John rolled his eyes and groaned. He walked over to the door to open it and saw the last person he expected: Randy.

"Is Alyssa there?" he asked.

"She doesn't wanna talk to you," John said firmly.

"Please, I need to talk to her. Let me talk to her."

"She doesn't wanna talk to you."

"Alyssa!" Randy called out desperately. He looked past John and tried to steal a glance at her. "Alyssa! Please, I need to talk to you. Please."

She walked up behind John and crossed her arms. "What do you want?"

"I need your help, Al, please. I'm begging you."

She placed her hand over John's lower back as reassurance before glancing icily at Randy. "Make it quick, alright?"

"Okay," Randy nodded.

"Are you sure?" John turned to Alyssa.

"Yeah, it's fine. We'l just be in the hallway."

John nodded as he regretfully stepped to the side to allow her past the door. He couldn't help but stare at the both of them until the door closed in front of him.

"What is it?" Alyssa, keeping some distance between them, crossed her arms.

"I need your help Al. I don't know what to do." Randy's expression was full of panic. His eyes were wide, and his veins were protruding way may more than ever. Alyssa was almost surprised he was even standing. His knees looked like they were about to unbuckle at any minute.

"What are you freaking out about?" she asked. She was seeing just how much of a stranger the man in front of her had become. He was a mess. He was a way bigger mess than she could have ever imagined.

Randy began to shake his head vigorously. It was getting harder and harder for him to breathe.

"I didn't even know she was pregnant, Al, but Sam just had a miscarriage at five months."


	18. That Bitch is Crazy

**So so so sorry for the hiatus, guys! I did not mean for it to happen, but if any of you care to hear my excuses, I had surgery, finals, a cold, crazy holiday work hours for retail, and by time I was finally free, I had lost my writing flow. Here's a long chapter to make up for the long wait. I recommend skimming through the last couple chapters to refresh your memory. I hope you all enjoy and I cannot wait to continue this! We're getting to my next favorite part :)**

**And as always, I would like to give a shout out to those who reviewed the last chapter: Hi14 x, Cena's baby doll, therealchamps, smash07, 1222mercedes1222, my time is now, GlamaHart32, and awesomeone21. **

* * *

John couldn't deny the jealousy that swarmed him when Alyssa walked in and told him that she'd be leaving the arena with Randy. How did she go from not wanting to talk to him to suddenly spending more time with him? His confusion erupted as explosively as his jealously. Those feelings, however, were soon replaced with worry when she briefly explained before shutting the door: Sam just had a miscarriage.

He barely had time to process those words before he was left alone in the room once again. Sam just had a miscarriage? It seemed that no one knew she was even pregnant. The room he stood in suddenly turned cold. He hoped and prayed that Sam would be okay, but he couldn't help but wonder if Randy had ulterior motives. It was understandable why he asked for Alyssa; Randy was well accustomed to running to her, but why did he insist on having her alone? John was just as good of a friend to Sam. Didn't he deserve to hear the announcement, too?

John shook his head. Of course not. Randy always chose Alyssa. She'd been the driving force behind his every action. It's the sole reason him and Randy's friendship was doomed. Falling in love with Alyssa automatically made John Randy's enemy. It was unfortunate and probably was why it took John so long to admit his feelings for Alyssa. But he was glad he finally took that risk. It was the best decision he'd ever made in his entire life.

Looking around his empty locker room, John took a seat on the cold metal and sighed. He knew very well that tonight, he was stuck in a game of waiting.

* * *

"Randy, just because I'm trying to get a hold of Sam with you, it doesn't mean we're friends again. I just wanna get that clear right now."

Amidst bucking in his seatbelt, Randy stole a glance at Alyssa. She was staring at him sternly. He sighed. "Look, I know how bad of a friend I was when I had you, but I'm not that person anymore."

"And that's besides the point." Alyssa crossed her arms and looked straight ahead. The view of a darkened sky wasn't much better than the one she had of Randy. It was bad enough she had to leave John but now she was stuck with this guy.

"Al-"

"Randy, please." She kept her stare straight ahead. "This isn't about you or me. It's about Sam. Now can we please get on with trying to reach her? You said the hospital she's checked into is across the state border. That's at least an hour drive."

His eyes stayed fixed on her profile. He absolutely missed this view. But unfortunately, it was evident to him- through her body language- that she didn't want to be around him. It hurt. Being around her provided visual proof that she wanted nothing to do with him.

Randy dropped his head before forcing himself to start the car. In a matter of seconds, the engine roared to life and the sound of pebbles being crushed under tires became the only source of sound. Alyssa stayed completely mute which inevitably forced Randy to do the same. The both of them knew that this long drive was going to feel even longer than it actually was.

Sam was the only thing that contained Alyssa in her seat. Her poor friend had gone through pregnancy on her own only to lose the baby. She imagined this devastation easily dwarfing the divorce in contrast. It's one thing to lose a marriage, but it's another thing to lose a life.

As they crossed more trees and covered more ground, Alyssa found herself wanting to kill the silence. There was no desire to talk to Randy, but her desperation to break off from her bogged thoughts ultimately overpowered.

"Randy, do you know if the baby was yours?"

His grip on the steering wheel immediately got tighter. His breath took a hitch before he opened his mouth and answered without blinking. "I think so."

"You think? So, you're not a hundred percent sure?"

He shook his head, his eyes affixed on the road. "No, but I'd think the only reason she even called me is because she knows it's mine. But that's not saying that I wouldn't drive to her if it wasn't."

Alyssa mulled over his words. Then, she asked a question that caught even herself off guard. "Did you love her?"

He blinked. A momentary lapse occurred and in those seconds, his whole marriage flashed before his eyes. "Yeah. I still do."

His answer heightened her curiosity. "Then why the divorce? What could possibly be stronger?"

A wash of guilt transformed his face, but he didn't let Alyssa see that. Instead, he enveloped his emotions in a smile and quickly glanced at his passenger. "Are you happy with where you are Al?"

"Yeah," she answered without hesitation. John's face flashed in her mind as soon as she heard the question.

"Well then, you don't needa know. Besides, she's better off not having me as her husband anyway."

Alyssa diligently stared at the one face she's known all her life and saw nothing but a stranger. His words didn't make sense- she couldn't understand them- and even his physical demeanor seemed unfamiliar. What happened to Randy? Last year, he was happy with Sam, and as one, they epitomized the perfect marriage. Somehow, it slipped through his fingers. But it wasn't just Sam. It was John, too. It was her, too. It seemed that everyone he truly cared for was now out of his life. What changed?

Before Alyssa got herself further marinated in these wonders, thick torrent erupted from the clouds and began to slosh against the windshield. She silently stared straight ahead as the wipers began to cross her vision left and right.

Meanwhile, Randy cleared his throat. He spoke loud enough to hush the rain. "You could take a nap if you'd like. I know how rain gets you sleepy. I'll wake you up when we're there. It's still a bit of a drive."

Instead of waiting for Alyssa's reply, Randy reached over and turned up the volume on the radio. Although the rain was blurring the world on the other side of the window, he gladly welcomed it. It came at an opportune time and provided the perfect excuse to stop all talk. No matter how much he missed being able to speak to Alyssa, he sought it best to end their conversation. She didn't need to dither over specifics of why his marriage failed. She didn't need the confirmation that it was because of her that his love for another woman couldn't last.

Lucky for Randy, Alyssa made no effort to disregard his suggestion of sleep. The next time he glanced over to the right, her legs were folded comfortably on the chair. Her eyes were closed, which made it all that much easier for him to pretend that he was alone all over again. It was easier that way.

* * *

She was being rattled and her immediate reaction was to push the cold hand away. "What the hell," Alyssa muttered. She opened her eyes regretfully but was shocked to see nothing but darkness. The only source of light came from a faint post light a few yards away.

"We're at the hospital parking lot."

Fighting out of her groggy state, she put a hand over her warm temple. The rain had stopped. "What time is it?"

"Eight."

"Eight? But we left around five. Was the drive that long?"

"No, actually, I saw Sam already," Randy explained.

Alyssa's eyes widened. "What? You saw her without me?"

"I tried to wake you up, but you were knocked out. I didn't wanna disturb you. Good news is, Sam's okay."

"Jesus Christ, Randy, I came here to see Sam, not sleep. Can you take me to her?" Without waiting for his reply, she unbuckled her seat belt and got out of the car. A gust of cold wind hit her face, and she responded by placing her hands into the warm pockets of her coat.

Randy watched as she made her way towards the entrance without ever looking at him. "She's fine, Al."

"Okay, but I need to see it for myself."

Instead of verbally replying, Randy nodded and took lead on their direction. Despite the heavy traffic, he easily navigated their way to Sam's room.

The whole walk made Alyssa's stomach churn. She hated hospitals. Everything around her was moving too fast and the lights were too bright. She crossed so many faces along the way, but not a single one had on a smile. The closest thing that resembled comfort seemed to be the man who was walking right beside her: Randy.

When he stopped in front of a door, he looked back at her. "This is her room. Did you wanna go in alone?"

To her surprise, she shook her head. She didn't understand her sudden inclination to wanting Randy around, but she didn't fight it either. "No, you can come in with me."

"Are you sure? I can wait right-"

"I'm sure," she answered immediately. She crossed her arms in hopes that it would calm her palpitations. It didn't work, especially when Randy brushed against her to open the door.

They were greeted by a nurse with a tired smile. A sigh escaped her lips before her words did. "Hi again, Mr. Orton. Sam will be needing to prepare for a routine pre-surgical test soon, but I'll give you guys a moment."

"Surgery?" Alyssa watched in horror as the nurse walked out. Her legs felt stuck, but her eyes panned to see Randy, then Sam.

"Alyssa, hey. It's so nice to see you." Sam had a brave smile on her face.

"Nice to see me? Sam, it's so nice to see you!" Alyssa was at her friend's bedside within seconds. She grabbed her hand and ignored how it cold it was.

"I'm sorry for not telling you I was pregnant."

"Don't apologize, please. I'm just happy to see your smile."

"Well, it's better than seeing tears, lemme tell you that." She smiled some more. "Thank you guys for coming, I really appreciate it. And I'm okay. I have an angel watching over me now. I'll be fine."

Alyssa squeezed her hand. She almost wanted to cry for Sam. She was being so strong, so brave. Possibly too strong, too brave.

Randy took her words in carefully and nodded. "Did the doctor say when your surgery is?"

"Tonight, after they run a few tests and get me sedated."

"Sedated? What exactly are they doing to you?" Alyssa asked. All this sounded insane, but Sam was talking so nonchalantly like it was nothing.

"A D&C. It's gonna open up my cervix so the doctor can take out all the bleeding inside my uterus. It's nothing too bad. They say I should feel normal within a day or two."

"I'll stay here and take you home," Randy said.

"Oh, don't bother. I can take a cab."

"I'm sure you can, but I'm not gonna leave you alone. I'll stay," he said firmly. He shifted his attention to Alyssa briefly, who was looking back at him. "Will you be okay driving back?"

"Yeah, of course," she answered immediately. The thought of driving back alone for over an hour dawned on her right after.

Randy nodded approvingly before walking over to the foot of the bed. His eyes softened as they returned to Sam. "Thank you for calling me."

"Eh, I thought it was a pretty late way of telling you I was pregnant, but I didn't want you to hear it from anybody else."

"I'm just glad to still have you here, Sam. Whether you mean it that you're okay or not, I'm glad to be here."

A hint of rose flushed Sam's cheeks. For the first time in a long time, Randy was making her feel like the only woman in the world. It didn't make sense, especially since Alyssa was right there, but she didn't question it. After learning she'd lost the baby, all she wanted was to feel elated. And right now, Randy was being the biggest help.

The short silence in the room was broken by a soft click when the nurse walked in with a clipboard in hand. "Sam, we'll be taking you into another room for some tests, okay?"

"Okay," Sam smiled.

"I'll be in the waiting room as soon as I walk Alyssa to the car, okay?"

"Okay."

The heavy thumping in Sam's chest vibrated throughout her whole body as she watched Randy make his way towards her. There was no telling what his intentions were, but when he grabbed her hand, her heart nearly leaped out of her chest.

"Everything's gonna be okay," he reassured her.

"Thank you. Thank you both."

Alyssa, feeling like part of the conversation again, smiled warmly. "It was my pleasure, Sam. I'm glad you're alright."

"Me too." Randy squeezed Sam's hand. "I'll see you in a little bit, okay?"

Clutching her stomach protectively, Sam nodded her head and smiled as her visitors walked away.

The two made a silent trip out of the hospital.

"I told you she was okay." Randy held the door for Alyssa as they walked outside.

"Definitely better than I could've ever imagined," she agreed. As she stepped out, the wind slapped her face again; only this time, it was much harder. Her brown hair swished all to one side. "But you know what, I think her state of mind has a lot to do with you."

"Me?" Randy's voice bled with surprise. He wasn't sure if he heard her right or if it was the wind.

"Yes, you." Alyssa, carefully watching her every step in the parking lot filled with small pools of water, repeated. "You were so sweet to her Randy. I have to admit, it caught me off guard, and I think it caught her off guard too. But in a good way."

"I just want her to be okay. She doesn't deserve to be engulfed in any more pain."

Tucking back the hair that had been slapping her face, Alyssa simply smiled and noted that they reached the car. She held out her hand to Randy.

"Drive safe. Please give me or Sam a text as soon as you arrive." Randy pulled the keys out of his pockets and placed it on her open palm.

"Will do." Alyssa eagerly nodded. Her eyes were barely able to hold Randy's gaze before he turned his back and headed back to the hospital. This was the very first time he didn't open her door and wait for her to drive off. She didn't know what to make of it, but it sure didn't feel like relief.

* * *

Alyssa could've fallen asleep in the hotel parking garage. After an hour and half's drive in solitude, she was ready to commit herself to tonight's shuteye. The only, absolute only, thing that drove her out of the car was knowing that she could now be with John.

Tonight's show had ended a couple hours ago, and she was sure to find him in their hotel room waiting. A day without John had been a long one. She aimlessly got out of the vehicle, but despite her efforts, she only ended up leading against it. If she was planning to make it up to their floor, she needed to wake herself up a little more. Hell, it surprised her she even made it back safe. Her eyelids dropped so many times during the drive, it was a miracle her head was able to stay upright throughout it all.

"Wake up, Alyssa. Wake the fuck up." She banged her head against the driver's window and exhaled. Where was the cold when you needed it to slap you to reality? The parking garage was stuffy and not to mention, the air smelled of skunk. She crinkled her nose in displeasure before finally making her way towards the elevators.

As she neared her targeted destination, the sound of laughter grew stronger. Looking up, she saw heels, legs, a short dress, and a head full of brown hair. This woman had her arms wrapped around somebody. It was a show Alyssa didn't mind to miss. She kept her feet moving forward, one eager step at a time. Within seconds, she was within five feet of the women in high heels, which meant that she was five feet closer to passing her. She tried her best to look down, in order to avoid witnessing any possible DNA, but the voices that grew were also voices that were very familiar. The man was telling the woman to stop, to back off.

Looking up, Alyssa was able to confirm and match the man's voice with his face. The man was John, and the woman in heels was Stacy. The sight of them together made her throat clench with anger, but it didn't take long before she found her voice. "Stacy! Back off of him!"

John, realizing Alyssa's presence, stood still with a shocked expression. Meanwhile, Stacy turned with a face mixed of confusion and irritation. She didn't say a word. Instead, her lip was set into a hard, straight line.

Alyssa's chest felt constricted. Her whole body felt paralyzed. Suddenly, she had a flashback of Stacy checking out John in the arena. She called him "a fine piece of meat". That should've raised a red flag. She should've expected this. Typical tramp. This newly found anguish pushed her to move closer to them, her steps defined purpose. "You cannot be throwing yourselves at your co-workers like that. Especially John."

Stacy took a half step back and tried to look at John, but Alyssa's voice forced her to turn again.

"He's mine, alright?" Alyssa didn't wait for anyone's response before she continued her quest to the elevator.

John followed right behind her. Not only did he endure some woman practically jumping his bones out of no where, but Alyssa had come to his rescue. And she declared him as hers? That placed a foolish smile on his face. For a moment, it allowed him to relinquish everything else.

"Ugh, what the hell was that girl thinking?" Alyssa groaned as they stepped into the elevator.

Sensing her pent up aggression, John placed a hand behind her lower back. "Al, baby-"

"She's the one who said you're the reason she got hired. What is her deal with you? Is she some crazed psychotic fan? Is she obsessed with you?"

John opened his mouth to speak, but he didn't know what to say. Kind of like how he didn't know how to react when this woman in heels suddenly put her arms around him. He was still making sense of everything, and as he did, the nerves began to mess with his head. Fortunately, this went by unknowingly to Alyssa. Instead, her shoulders loosened up and her whole guard went down. She looked too exhausted to keep up an angry rant over a deranged co-worker. She changed the subject to something much more relevant.

"Sam's okay, John. When I saw her, it was like nothing happened. She looked happier than the last time I saw her."

John noticed how, in sharp contrast to Sam, Alyssa still appeared to be distraught over the miscarriage. She hid it well under her small smile, but it was her eyes that betrayed her. She looked sad, and John couldn't resist the urge to pull her into a hug right then and there. He buried his face into her hair, which smelled of apricot shampoo tinged with wind. She was shivering, and he didn't know if it was from her delicate state or if the cold had crept in between her clothes, but he was more than glad to offer his warmth to her.

"I'm glad she's okay, and that you're back with me." John, to demonstrate his joy over their reunion, circled his arms around her even tighter.

The elevator came to a stop at their floor, but the both them waited a few more seconds before releasing one another. Silently, they stepped out and made their way to the room, hand in hand.

A sigh of relief escaped Alyssa's lips as soon as she stepped foot inside. It was nice to see a bed. It was nice to have John's arm around her waist. Despite her fatigue, her heart didn't fail to race as John twirled her around to be face to face. They were barely a foot away from the bed, and it was such a tease. A smile played her lips as his eyes danced at the sight of her.

Then, the corners of his lips dropped.

Alyssa leaned her head back with a confused look on her face. "What is it?"

John guided his hands to hers.

The way he looked at her made her nervous.

"I have to tell you something."

She wanted to say okay, but she couldn't speak. She stood still while her heart began to hammer away at her ribs.

"Remember when you asked me if I knew a Stacy?"

"Yeah," Alyssa said softly. There were a million things that this could mean, but she was too afraid to consider any of them.

"Well, I thought I didn't," John said softly. His eyes were already apologizing.

"Okay," Her voice was barely audible. It was just under a whisper.

"But that's because the Stacy you know had told me her name was Candy."

"Candy?" Alyssa pulled her hand out of John's grasp and furrowed her eyebrows.

"I met her during our time away from each other…"

And whatever John said after that, she didn't know. She didn't listen. She _couldn't_ listen. Whatever he said, it couldn't have been any good. All the blood came rushing to her head, but even faster than the blood, was the whirlwind of her past. Melanie. Candy. The notes. She was the one that left John the note.

_I had a lot of fun teaching you new tricks last night. Can't wait to do it again. Call me._

"Al," John tugged on her hand, bringing her right back to reality. "I had no idea she was even working here."

She began to nod, but she did so without saying a word.

"I promise you she doesn't mean anything."

Stacy is Candy. And Candy's the woman who'd spent the night with John, the woman who showed him new tricks, the brunette he allowed himself to be with. This was the woman he was with right before he came back to her.

"Al," John cupped her cheeks. "Talk to me."

"John, I believe you. I believe you, okay?" She placed her hands over his. She wanted to believe him. She wanted so desperately to believe him. She wanted to believe that Stacy doesn't mean anything. She trusted this man in front of her and believed that he'd do nothing to hurt her.

It was Stacy who was the problem. She was insane and crazy and she needed to stay the hell away from John. Lying about John being the reason she got hired? Jumping on him at the parking lot just a few minutes ago? What was this girl up to? Judging from her record, it could be anything.

"I-I was walking to the elevator after checking to see if you were there, and then she jumped on me and started hugging me. By the time I saw you, I had barely realized it was Candy. But then here's the kicker: you called her Stacy. It was when we got out of the elevator when I pieced it together and realized Stacy and Candy are the same person."

"That bitch is crazy," Alyssa muttered bitterly. Her whole day had been crazy. Finding out Sam had a miscarriage, driving with Randy, finding comfort in Randy, Randy acting like the man Sam had fallen in love with, seeing Stacy with John, and now finding out that Stacy's hooked up with John? This was too much.

Alyssa closed her eyes for a second, desperate to transport her mind into another world. In that second, she pretended that nothing ever happened and that she was simply laying on the grass with John and that no one else around. This fantasy was short-lived when vibrations began to curse through her front pockets.

She opened her eyes and instinctively drew out the phone from her coat. Her screen read Randy. "Shit. I forgot to let him know I arrived. I have to take this."

Alyssa was again out of John's hold before he could even anticipate it. His eyes followed her until his own cell phone called for his attention. He looked at it and saw he had a text message from an unknown number. And from what it said, he knew exactly who it was. His heart dropped to his stomach.

_Hey John, I wasn't aware you were seeing Alyssa. Are you gonna tell her or should I? _


	19. I Gotta Ask You Something

**Major, major, major kudos to all my readers. Thank you for your patience as I desperately try to get my flow back. I do plan to update weekly again even if that means I have to force myself on the keyboard. I personally want to thank those who reviewed the last chapter: therealchamps, awesomeone21, my time is now, Hi14 x, Cena's baby doll, and 1222mercedes1222. Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

John stared at the screen for awhile, heavily debating whether or not to reply. Frankly, he didn't know what to make of it. What was he supposed to say to that threatening text from Stacy, or Candy, or whoever the hell it was?

I already told Alyssa? Mind your own business? Back the fuck off?

He dreamed of telling her to fuck off, but instead, he found himself tossing his phone to the side. He didn't need to reply. The last thing he wanted to do was provoke any more communication between them. That woman had done enough, and she'd been crazy to do any of it in the first place. But still, the thought of her made him sick to his stomach. What was he thinking trying to fill Alyssa's place with women like that? To lie and say he was the reason she got hired, to jump on him out of the no where, and now, to send a cryptic text message after learning he was already with someone else? What was she trying to do? Whatever it was, it definitely turned him off. It took him only a millisecond before he deviated his thoughts to something else. To something better. To Alyssa.

He stared at her from across the room. She was standing in front of the sliding doors, staring out into the darkened sky. With her right hand holding up the phone to her ear, she used her free hand to nervously toy with the buttons on her blouse. He couldn't tell what she was nervous about- whether it was from being on the phone with Randy, news about Sam, or even as an after-effect of learning about Candy- but he felt this burning desire to just take her shaky hand and hug her. He didn't do that, though. For some reason, he felt like he would be an intrusion. Instead, he simply stared and waited until she hung up the phone and turned to him. She smiled. He could tell it took everything she had to force it.

"Why are you smiling?" he challenged. It was a simple question- one someone could've taken as a joke, but he was serious. He knew it made her think, and he didn't stop himself from walking towards her now.

"Mm, I don't know," she said softly, her shoulders limp. She slid her phone into the back pocket of her jeans and stared at him.

"Then don't smile. You don't needa pretend to be okay for us to be okay. You got that?" He leaned down so their eyes were leveled. Then, he reached over and tucked some hair behind her ear.

"I am okay." She stared briefly before changing the subject. "Sam's surgery went well. They're in a cab now."

"That's good news. That's good news!" John made the repetition to elicit some excitement out of Alyssa, but when it didn't work, he scratched his head. "Baby…"

"Look, I'm not lying to you when I say I'm okay. I'm just tired. It's been a long day. I'm in a gray area John; I'm neither happy nor sad. I'm just trying to get through the rest of the night."

John studied her delicate features and noted how her eyes were pleading with him to just let things be. The next thought that came to him was how perfectly fine he was with right now. Him and Alyssa were together, and as long as that was the case, everything else didn't matter. "Well, the rest of the night is about to be even better. Lets get in bed and plan tomorrow. Will you spend the whole day with me?"

A real smile formed her lips. "Isn't that why I came back to work early? To spend time with you?"

John tugged on her hand and began caressing it. He held a smile of his own. "Yeah, I just wanted to hear you say yes."

"Yes!" She smiled, and it reached her eyes this time. She bit her lip and tip toed in order to reach his lips. Then, she kissed him. "I love you."

His eyes were still closed. He opened them. "I love you, too, baby. I love you, too."

* * *

A glimmer of light peaked through the curtains and invaded a streak in the room. Alyssa's skin felt cold even before she opened her eyes to realize she was alone on the bed. She sat up, pushing over the white duvet that covered everything up to her neck. Her freshly woken eyes hadn't been mistaken. She was alone. There was no John. Instead, an unfamiliar dress hung over his side of the bed with a note propped on top.

Moving against the cold air that filled the room, Alyssa reached over and read the note:

_Goodmorning beautiful._

_I thought this dress would love good on you, then again, you can make anything look impeccable. I'm sorry you had to wake up by yourself, but the surprises start now. I'll be waiting for you at the lobby at noon. See you then. _

_Love,_

_John_

A smile had crept into Alyssa's lips long before she finished the note, and it was still playfully forming her face. The only thing that deviated her mind from John's sweet note was the dress that laid beside her. She quickly reached over and picked it up with both hands. The dress was white and flowy with short sleeves and a scoop neckline. The back, she noticed after turning it over, was very low cut. The fabric was soft and she couldn't wait to put it on. She couldn't wait to see John and to see the reaction.

It didn't take long before she scurried over to the bathroom and began getting ready. John would be waiting for her at the lobby at noon and that thought alone made her center burn both with excitement and want.

* * *

11:59 was what his phone read in big white letters. It was the same number he saw the last time he checked his phone. The only difference now was, his heart was beating a tenfold times more. Alyssa would be down any minute now and John wasn't sure if he'd be able to quell his nerves. The plastic in contact with his palm was becoming moist from his sweat. If it wasn't for his fingers being so tensely wrapped around it, what he held would've already plummeted to the ground. Hell, if he wasn't leaning against the wall, his knees would've hit the ground.

John, momentarily distracted by the way his body was reacting, nearly missed the second Alyssa entered the lobby. Thankfully, despite his mind journeying from place to place, his eyes had stayed fixed to the elevator doors. The simple sight of Alyssa, with her wavy long hair and white flowy dress, snapped him back to consciousness. He was suddenly standing straight with a smile on his face.

"Hey handsome." Alyssa grinned. It always refreshed her to see John out of a t-shirt and into a button up.

Meanwhile, John did his own scan of her from top to bottom. He didn't know how she'd gotten to him so fast but the way she looked up at him made him forget any question he'd ever had. All he could think about was how soft her lips looked and how glad he was that she barely had on any make up. Her cheeks looked blushed, but her eyes looked untouched. She had on strappy sandals with a small cross body bag to match.

"You look phenomenal," he said to her.

"Thanks to this dress you got me."

"Oh baby, trust me, even without an inch of fabric on, you'd still look phenomenal."

The rose in Alyssa's cheeks got deeper as she tried to blink her shyness away. The way John looked at her, as if she were the only person in this lobby, as if she were the only person in this world, was making her wish she back in the room. With him and without all these other people walking around them. Without her dress and his shirt and his jeans in between them.

A moment passed.

"Here." John, breaking the spell only to cast another one, brought up his hand and presented a box wrapped in clear plastic. "I got you something."

Without breaking eye contact, Alyssa took the box out and opened it within a couple swift motions. She looked down and saw a brown leather case. Digging in, she pulled up the case and saw a black pair of Ray-ban clubmasters.

"It's for where I'm about to take you," John explained.

"Oh yeah, how do ya like em on me?" Alyssa took the sunglasses and placed it over her face. She didn't mind that it made the room a lot dimmer. She was having fun being John's model.

"Even better than I imagined," John said, smiling. He grabbed her hand and swayed it left and right. "You ready to go?"

Alyssa lifted the frames off her face then placed them on top of her head. "Yes."

John leaned his face lower and closer, but he didn't kiss her.

Tip toeing with her brown sandals, Alyssa held his gaze as she softly brushed her lips against his. "Thank you for the sunglasses. And the dress. And for holding my hand."

John shrugged. "You deserve it all, baby."

"Mmmm." Alyssa placed both hands over John's shoulders in satisfaction. "Not sure what I've done to deserve such a great guy. Let's go?"

"Let's go!" John repeated calmly, a curve still on his face. He gingerly took both of her hands before releasing them so he could hold her waist.

The two easily navigated their way out of the hotel.

Right outside the parking lot, which the lovebirds failed to notice, was Stacy staring right at them with utter and complete disgruntlement. She'd just gotten out of her car, the heat spilling over her from the glaring sun. She glared right back at it.

"Ugh! You two don't make sense," she groaned.

She squinted her eyes, hating the way John held the other woman close, hating the way the other woman smiled and laughed and looked at John as if he were a God. Damn it.

"You were inside of me a few days ago, Johnny boy. I don't know who you're tryna fool, but I know you're dying to go back in."

Stacy's line of vision continued to follow them even as they got into the car, warmed up the engine, and drove away. It could've been for a minute or five, she didn't know nor keep track of time, but her hands were shaking.

They were shaking even when she got into her hotel room where she found herself planning, scheming, plotting.

* * *

Alyssa swore she'd gotten at least three shades darker. She stared bravely at the culprit, the Raybans used as a protective shield. The minutes of scorching heat was finally behind her, thanks to the reign of clouds, and now all she could feel was the trickle of breeze weaving through and into her dress. Right in front of her were yards and yards of sand followed by miles and miles of water. Here and there were sporadic sightings of bottles left behind, chairs, and tree trunks that suffered some kind of deformity. But there were no other people around. Other than birds flying here and there, the ear couldn't have detected any evidence of company. And to Alyssa, that was just fine.

"The weather's perfect today," John commented.

"This whole day is perfect," Alyssa said. She shifted her vision from the sun over to John and noticed his deep concentration at the ocean. They'd been at the beach for a few hours now but neither of them have reached any peak of boredom. She figured it was because this atmosphere was the complete opposite of what they were used to- frenzied fans, high energy, lights, camera, and a plethora of people directing them for this and that and that and this. But here, it was just them and the sand underneath them. No rush, no schedule, no pressure. Just them.

John, feeling Alyssa's eyes on him, turned and met her gaze. He took her hand and immediately felt the grittiness from the sand in between their palms. "Listen-"

Alyssa picked up on John's tone and noted how quickly it changed the mood.

"I gotta ask you something."

Alyssa blinked.

"To be honest with you, I've been wanting to ask you this for awhile now. Way before anything between us even happened."

Alyssa held her breath. She wasn't appreciating what seemed to be this interminable preamble he was rambling. Where the hell was he going with this?

"I probably should've asked you this sooner, but timing with us was going weird and…" John trailed off. He could tell Alyssa was getting anxious, and hell, he was getting impatient with himself as well. He didn't know why he was taking so long to ask his question. Maybe it was the nerves. Maybe it was a stupid question. Maybe he shouldn't even ask.

John let out a shaky breath, then he chuckled. "I guess I should just ask you the question now, huh?"

She nodded her head with a sharp look.

"Alyssa, will you be my girlfriend?"

Alyssa stared in shock then quickly dissolved into a fit of laughter.

John watched as she leaned back on her elbows to handle her vibrating tummy. The sound coming out of her mouth was refreshing and lively but it also had him even more nervous. "Why are you laughing?"

"Because you built it up so much, you scared the crap out of me." Alyssa bit her lip before wrapping both arms around John's neck. She sent them both plummeting to the ground, sand rising up and all around them. But neither of them cared.

John tucked her loose hair that dangled over to his face.

"To answer your dire question John." Alyssa paused, a devious smile on her face. If he made her wait, he could wait too, but the problem was, she couldn't wait to answer. "Yes, John Cena, I would love to be your girlfriend."

He smiled. "Officially."

"Officially." Alyssa nodded before looking at the vast space around them. When she turned her eyes back to John, she was looking at him with a different purpose. "So…we're pretty secluded and you were saying something earlier about not having an inch of fabric on me?"

John, toppled with a new surge of excitement, didn't take long to pick up on her suggestive tones. Instead of replying through verbalization, he snaked his hand to the back of her dress and easily located the zipper.

* * *

A title shouldn't have made a difference but John couldn't deny the new burst of energy that had warped both him and Alyssa. They'd been officially 'boyfriend and girlfriend' for 24 hours now and their level of elation was profound. He couldn't stop tracing his mind back to yesterday and how immaculate she looked in that white dress and how she practically dared him to undress her at the beach. That was the first time he'd ever done something so intimate at a public place, but she made the experience beyond anything a bed and bedroom could have provided him with. John nearly blushed just thinking about it. He could see all the sand pressed against her bare stomach and hear the way his name caressed her lips as he caressed her body and her mind.

He was thinking of her so much, in fact, he'd nearly neglected the throng of photos he was supposed to sign. There were stacks and stacks of his face staring back at him but all he could see was Alyssa's smile. John shook his head at the dormant black sharpie gripped in his hand and monotonously began to sign. He willed himself to freeze all thoughts of his girlfriend before he ended up scribbling her name instead of his.

Not a minute later, a familiar voice called out his name. He raised his eyebrows and noticed someone's hip pressed against the side of his leg.

"John, can we talk?"

"I'm kinda busy right now, Stacy."

"But John…" Stacy reached over and placed a hand over the photograph he was signing.

"Stacy!" John let go of the marker in his hand and grabbed Stacy's wrist.

His hold was out of frustration, but she smiled anyway. She missed his touch. She missed being this close to him.

John released her and sighed. Then he took a step back. He looked at the woman in front of him not believing her audacity.

"How could you be with her when you were with me just a few days ago? Huh? Tell me."

"Look, whatever happened between us, it's over now. Can we please just leave it at that?"

"No, because you're with _her._" Stacy's face was scrunched with undeniable and irrational disgust.

"Leave Al out of this and leave me alone, okay?" John turned his attention back to the photos.

"But how are you guys together when you two obviously sleep around the locker room?"

_You two obviously sleep around the locker room? _John grabbed the sharpie and began signing again. If he pretended not to notice her, maybe she'd go away and take her lies with her.

"Honestly, John. How could you two sleep around-"

"I'm not sleeping around anymore, alright? I'm done." John stared at her sharply before signing another photo.

"And Alyssa?"

"She never slept around. She's not you."

Stacy narrowed her eyes at the last comment but stayed relentless. "But she's been with another wrestler-"

"No, she hasn't, Stacy."

"Oh…are you sure about that, John?" Stacy titled her head and studied his profile. His eyebrows were furrowed and his muscles looked tensed. When he didn't counter her question, she smiled. "Well, well, John. My point proven. You and Alyssa obviously don't know each other enough. Why don't you go ask your girlfriend who she's been with before the rest of the locker room tells you."

John gritted his teeth. Before his mind was able to fully formulate what Stacy had just said, she was already gone and he was all alone.

* * *

John couldn't have asked for a better crowd. The energy was electrifying and it was enough to distract him from the startling questions Stacy had asked him prior. Now that his segment was over, he walked backstage as the sweat rolled down his skin. He took each step cautiously with absolutely no rush to reach his locker room. For some reason, the thought of being in a small room caused a heavy feeling of dread, and he couldn't seem to shake it. He wanted to be with a multitude of people instead of these circling questions that kept tormenting his head. He knew not to take Stacy seriously. Her track record was no where near clean, but she'd made a good point. John had no idea who Alyssa had been with. It may not be important and the answer may be trivial, but he still wanted to know. Why wouldn't he want to know more about his girlfriend?

He journeyed through the halls and eventually got to his room. He pushed the door open and immediately caught sight of Alyssa sitting comfortably on the leather couch.

"Hey baby! Great match!" She stood up and reached her arms out. She didn't care at all that he was sweaty.

"Thanks," he muttered. He hugged her back but only shortly. His attention shifted from her to his towel in a second. When he turned away, she stood still and watched as he wiped himself dry. "Just let me put a shirt on and we'll get out of here, okay?"

"Okay," Alyssa said.

John tossed the towel to the side and reached for a fresh tee. He placed it over his head and when he looked, Alyssa was still standing in the same place, expressionless. He finished putting on his shirt.

Silence ensued long after.

It only thinned John's patience so he decided to open his mouth. "Al, I gotta ask you something."

She wanted to smile because those were the exact words he'd used on her yesterday. But for some reason, he looked serious today. "What is it?"

"Have you ever been with a wrestler other than me?"

Alyssa tried to suppress her shock at his question, but it only made her completely mute.

John stepped towards her, and when he did, he noticed how scared she really looked. "Al, have you?"

"Technically, yes."

"What does that mean?"

"Well," Alyssa looked away. She was nervously knotting her fingers together. "When I was with him, he wasn't a wrestler yet."

"Okay." John slowly began to nod his head. This made sense. No wonder he never heard about it. But did he know who this guy was? Did this guy still work in the industry? "Who was it?"

The temperature in the room didn't change, but for some reason, Alyssa was starting to feel extremely warm. She didn't want John to have to ask twice, but she couldn't seem to bring herself to answer. She couldn't bring herself to admit her past and to remember who it was she'd been with. "It was Randy," she said. "He was my first boyfriend."


	20. It Was All a Lie

**I'd like to thank all the awesome people who left a review on the last chapter: john cena good gurl, Emilia, therealchamps, Alex, RandyOrtonxWifexx, my time is now, Hi14 x, and Cena's baby doll. I'm happy to finally be on this part of the story. I hope you all enjoy! **

* * *

Alyssa stood in the corner with her arms crossed over her chest. Anger was starting to simmer deep down inside, but people were walking all around her and she didn't want any stares. Attention was the last thing she wanted right now. She just wanted to go home. She didn't want to be at school. She didn't want to be in the same vicinity as Caroline and her catty accusations.

_You're a loser Alyssa. You got nothing. No license and no boyfriend. And you've never even been kissed. Nobody wants you. Not even your own parents. _

Alyssa bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling but failed to keep the tears from springing her eyes. No matter how hard she tried to think of something else, Caroline's voice remained tyrant. The next time she blinked, a couple of tears rolled down her cheeks. She hurriedly brushed them away with the sleeves of her flannel. But even with a dry face, she still felt the lump forming in her throat. And not only that, but her knees were beginning to tremble.

Caroline and her were friends. But that wasn't the obvious case today when Alyssa walked into sixth period and had nearly the whole class stare at her as if she were some contaminate to society. She didn't understand the odd looks and when she tried to make eye contact with Caroline for support, all she got was a smirk. After class, Alyssa tried to talk to her but all she ended up saying were nasty things and that their friendship was over.

Alyssa was blindsided. She just wanted to go home. Randy had warned her about Caroline and her fake facade but she'd been so naive. To make matters worse, Randy wasn't at their usual meeting spot to go home. He was probably stuck in class, she thought, as she stood next to their locker alone. His sixth period teacher always liked to ramble over the clock. That never bothered Alyssa, but today, today it was pushing her over the edge. She hugged herself tighter and her head, her head kept getting fuzzier. All she could hear was Caroline's voice and it got nastier and nastier.

_Nobody wants you. _

_No license. No boyfriend. Never been kissed. _

_You're a loser. _

Alyssa bit her lip harder this time. It didn't feel like anything. Physically, she could not feel a tinge except for the way her heart progressively convulsed. She looked from side to side and saw students still lingering around campus. Who knew how desolating it was to be around so many people. The air smelled of cheap perfume, sweat, and pent up lust. Snippets of conversations zoomed past her but not a single one corroborated with her head. The only thing that clicked coherently with her was Randy finally emerging from view. He was walking slowly along the other set of lockers. It was at second glance when Alyssa noticed he was walking with a girl.

"Randy, please, can we go," Alyssa pleaded. She knew he couldn't hear her, but her desperation was toppling over. She needed to go.

After watching him walk a few more steps, her best friend finally looked over. "We'll go in fifteen minutes!"

Fifteen minutes? In class, that easily translated into an hour. Right now, it was translating into eternity. A long, interminable, and painful eternity.

Alyssa hugged herself even tighter, bit her lip even harder, and began shaking her head. "I'ma go."

Randy watched in confusion as his best friend scurried away. He watched her grow into the distance, and the smaller and smaller she got, the bigger and bigger his concern got. She was completely gone from view within seconds, and he stood there stunned, wondering what the hell happened to his best friend.

* * *

Typical. Nobody was home when Alyssa finally got to her house. She wandered through the empty rooms, stepping on the cold linoleum, surprised that no tears were crashing down her cheeks. She tossed her book bag on the floor and collapsed on the couch. She just wanted the whole room to engulf her and to bury her deep, deep underground, where she could live in solitude without Caroline and her nasty taunts.

Alyssa closed her eyes and leaned her head back. Her heart was beating hard against her chest, but before any of the tears started trickling down her face, her front door opened. Randy came rushing in and was at her feet within seconds.

"What happened?" he asked her. He hated the look on her face.

She stood up and crumbled into his arms. The front of his grey shirt grew damp the very next second.

Randy palmed her head and dug his fingers into her soft hair. "Who did this to you?"

"Caroline," she muffled, pulling her face back. She wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand and looked up at her best friend. "She started talking shit."

He didn't look surprised. "Let her be an asshole then."

"But I'm stuck in school with her! She's in my class, Randy."

"I told you she eats out of her ass. Don't believe her lies."

"But they're the truth! I don't have a license, I don't have a boyfriend, I've never been kissed-"

"Al, so what?" Randy cupped her face with both hands.

He was looking at her seriously and it stimulated her head to think instead of her heart.

"Al, so what?" Randy repeated. "You have plenty of time to get your license. Hell, it's good you're off the road with all these stupid drivers nowadays. You don't have a boyfriend, but it's not your fault there hasn't been a guy good enough for you. And yeah, you haven't been kissed, but any guy would be lucky to kiss those soft lips of yours."

For the first time since sixth period, Alyssa's heart began to lax.

Randy traced his thumb along the hairs that framed her face. "Now you know who she really is, so don't bite into the bullshit she's tryna feed you. She's insecure, but that doesn't mean you have to be, too."

Alyssa pulled him in for another bear hug. He was always good at putting things in perspective for her. "You're the best, Rands. Thank you."

They released each other after a few seconds.

"You all better now?"

"Yeah…I just don't get why she would do something like this. Doesn't she have anything better to do, and UGH!"

"Al!" Randy was starting to see her eyes burn with fire again. "Don't let her control you."

Alyssa nodded her head.

"Don't let her control you," Randy enunciated carefully. He grabbed her shoulders and looked her seriously in the eye. "Don't let her control you."

"Yes. Okay. I heard you the second time."

"Caroline's not your friend. She doesn't deserve free rent in your head. She can think, say, and do whatever she wants, but you're the only one who can define yourself. You got that?"

Alyssa carefully thought about Randy's words and began to nod. She smiled gratefully at him before wrapping both arms securely around his neck. "Thanks again."

Randy circled her waist. "Of course, best friend. I love you."

Alyssa smiled at the last three words. They'd said it to each other more than to anybody else. "I love you, too."

Randy released her, but to her surprise, he kept them in great proximity. They stood so close, she felt his breath grow as jagged as his heartbeat. It was almost becoming difficult for her to distinguish which was his and her own. Both were steadfast.

He silently stared at her face.

Alyssa's whole body nearly jolted when Randy's eyes fell to her lips. It lingered there. No one's ever looked at her like this. She knew what he was getting ready to do. She knew what was about to happen. She didn't understand why or how it got to this, but she didn't want to stop it.

Randy leaned closer and closer. Her heart hummed faster and faster.

In an instant, their lips touched and it awakened senses they didn't even know they had. Their fingers tingled and their hearts fluttered. Randy deepened the kiss before slowly pulling back to look at his best friend.

Neither said a word but the both of them knew that nothing would ever be the same after that.

* * *

"You kissed me first."

"Oh, shut up!" Alyssa smacked Randy's chest with her spiral notebook and got off his bed. "I would've never even _thought_ to kiss my best friend. Of all people."

"But now you love kissing your best friend." Randy did a playful up and down motion with his eyebrows.

Alyssa rolled her eyes. "Yeah because unfortunately, he's now my boyfriend, too."

"Hey, hey, hey!" Randy stood up. "Be nice to your driver instructor."

"Oh, you just love claiming all your titles, don't you?"

Randy grabbed her waist with both hands and brought her close. "Yes I do, because I'm happy to be in every aspect of your life."

Alyssa smiled contently up at Randy. She'd never had a boyfriend- never even dreamed of being in a relationship this good, this early- but he made it so easy. The transition from best friend to this felt so natural as if their prior years of friendship built up to this. That very first night they kissed, she'd asked him why he kissed her. He smirked before telling her that he always thought she was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen and that her lips had been a distraction since the first grade. He just never thought he'd be the lucky guy to kiss them until that night. That special night. That very same moment unleashed new feelings for the both of them and it brought them even closer. Randy touched an untouched part of her both physically and emotionally. Alyssa made him feel like he had the whole world on the palm of his hands.

It was crazy. They were teenagers, and in love.

* * *

Alyssa couldn't have anticipated what came five months after their first kiss.

She was sitting on her calves, in his disheveled room, with a piece of paper in her hands.

_Hey babe. You are the most amazing boyfriend ever. Thank you for the flowers. Purple's my favorite color, but I see you already knew that._

_Melanie. _

Melanie.

Randy lied. He said Melanie was his cousin. He said those flowers were for his cousin. He said he'd be back in a few minutes, but where the hell was he now?

Alyssa couldn't keep her eyes off the paper. She thought maybe, just maybe, if she looked at it long enough, the words would disappear, things would be different, Randy wouldn't have lied, and that he really had a cousin named Melanie. But the more she looked at it, the more her heart ached. Everything inside of her was crumbling.

The one and _only _person she trusted was lying to her and this damned piece of paper was proof. She must've been staring at it for ten or thirty minutes; she really didn't know. She lost sense of time.

All she managed to do was look up when Randy finally walked in.

He stood there, mirroring her frozen state and horrified expression. His eyes went back and forth between her face and the piece of paper in her hands. He stepped forward.

"Alyssa, I can explain-"

She stood up and as soon as she did, all the tears came crashing down her face. "How long, Randy?"

"Alyssa, please, hear me out." He walked closer to her.

"How long?" Her voice bled with anguish.

"A few days before we kissed."

_A few days before we kissed?_

All hell inside of Alyssa broke loose. The sorrow she felt was quickly washed over with anger and fury. Her temples burned and her fingers curled into a tight fist.

He'd been with this other girl the whole _entire_ time he was with her. _The entire time._ Was all of it a lie? Was all of it pretend? Was he pretending when he told her that he couldn't picture himself with anybody else? How could she have believed every word, every kiss, every moment? It was all a lie.

"Alyssa," Randy said calmly. He walked even closer.

"Stay the hell away from me." Alyssa extended out her hand and backed away. "Stay. Away. From. Me."

His eyes were desperately pleading with her.

Alyssa didn't say another word before she bolted out of his room and rushed down the stairs. She was out of his house within a second, but Randy followed close behind.

"Wait! Alyssa! Alyssa, it's raining, lemme at least drive you home."

Alyssa, still sheltered from his extended roof, spun around. She walked towards him in order to battle the harsh sound of downpour. "Is that what all this was about? Is that why you taught me how to drive? Because you felt bad for me?"

Randy watched Alyssa break furthermore in front of him, but he didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know how he could make it better.

"Is that why you asked me to be your girlfriend? Because you felt bad for your best friend who's never been kissed? That's the only damn reason, huh? You felt bad for me?" Her voice was breaking, but the stare she gave Randy was the sharpest thing he'd ever seen. "Well you know what, if I wanted to feel bad about myself, I could've just gone to Caroline."

Alyssa backed up and when she turned away, she nearly disappeared into the rain. She ran as fast as she could despite the slippery surface beneath her. The space between her and Randy grew. More and more rain continued to pour all around her. The tumultuous and unforgiving sky was nothing compared to how ugly and broken she felt inside. The rain and everything else in this world, she learned, could not hurt her anymore than her own best friend had.

* * *

To chase after her would've been the selfish thing to do. She clearly wanted nothing to do with him and the last thing he wanted was to prolong her pain by extending his presence around her.

It took a while for Randy to walk back into his house. He stood outside for awhile just staring at the heavy torrent coming down to the ground. The tenacity and intensity of the weather perfectly resembled the way his relationship had crumbled. He couldn't believe it. But what did he expect? He'd been lying to the one person he truly ever cared for.

Randy shook his head and walked inside. He jogged up to his room and noted how empty the house felt. As soon as he got to his room, he grabbed his phone and made a call.

He got an answer after the second ring. "Hello?"

"Hey Mel, I really hate to do this over the phone, but I can't do this anymore."

"What?" She didn't hide the alertness in her tone.

"I'm sorry, Melanie. I can't be with you. Goodbye."

Randy hung up before she had the chance to say anything. He couldn't deal with elaborations and proper closures right now. All he wanted was sleep, but he couldn't even stand the thought of his bed. Alyssa wouldn't be there next to him.

To keep his mind busy, he looked around his room. It was a lot cleaner than he remembered, but he knew there were some things he needed to throw out. He rummaged inside of his closet and invaded his secret stash tucked away in the corner. It was covered by mounds and mounds of clothes, paper, DVDS, and books, but this was nothing new to him. He went through this pile every single day. He'd left it messy on purpose with the hopes that Alyssa would never rifle through it. It worked, but he got caught anyway.

He dug his hand into his well-planned mess and pulled out a box. Inside were condom wrappers. About a hundred of them.

He took the box, jogged downstairs, and threw it outside in the trash. He didn't care that it was raining and that he got wet. He didn't care that the box got wet. He didn't need any of those foils anymore. He vowed to never have sex again.

At least, not anytime soon and definitely not with Melanie. It was because of her and sex with her that drove him to be deceitful to Alyssa. He was so stupid to think the situation was okay: to have Alyssa fulfill his mind and soul while simultaneously having Melanie toy with his body.

He'd been addicted to sex ever since he lost his virginity to his first girlfriend. He never told Alyssa this because he was ashamed and well, he wasn't sure if she'd understand. Quickly after getting dumped, he started his string of one night stands. He wasn't proud of it, but he couldn't stop. He had this hunger that he needed to feed. Melanie was the only girl that went for a second round and their lustrous meetings quickly turned into an everyday thing.

Then, he kissed Alyssa. That night he kissed her was the first night he strayed from sex ever since he started his escapade. For that night, he didn't need it and he thought he could suppress it. But his physical desires quickly and abruptly resurfaced. And there Melanie was.

Every single day with Alyssa, he'd secretly fight the urges of penetration and lip biting and hair pulling and jagged breathing. He never made that move on her, because he never wanted to take her virginity just for the sake of his libido. His internal battle remained a secret. And every time he'd pull away when the urges got overwhelming, he'd tell her he was just tired and she believed him. She believed him every time.

When she was away, he'd be with Melanie. Many sleepless nights were spent in his room with her, which almost always left Randy in a haze of satisfaction and guilt the following morning. He believed he was doing the right thing- the absolute best thing possible. He was couldn't pick between Alyssa and his addiction, and since he refused to include her in his addiction, he thought he was saving her.

It wasn't until today when he realized the severity of what he'd done. It wasn't until he walked into his room and saw the look on her face that he realized just how hurtful his decisions were. It wasn't until Alyssa was completely away from him when he realized he'd not only broke her heart but his own, as well.

Randy wanted nothing more than to undo the hurt. If he could take all those nights and all those lies back, he would. He'd tell the whole world what he'd done if it'd show her how sorry he was. He'd do anything to get Alyssa back. But what do you when the person you love deserved someone better?


	21. Full of Bull

**YES, I'M FINALLY UPDATING! I don't know what's harder to believe: how long this shit took or that I'm actually updating. Finalllyyyy. ****If you're reading this, I commend you! Thanks for hanging in there with me! I am not giving up. I want to especially thank those who last reviewed: Hi14 x, Cena's baby doll, therealchamps, RandyOrtonxWifexx, my time is now, 1222mercedes1222, awesomeone21, Rowan S. Rose. Again, thank you for bearing with me. I hope you enjoy.**

* * *

The urgency to know was growing with every second but even more unnerving was the loudness in the silence that surrounded them. Here John stood, in front of his girlfriend, and he'd forced yet another new confession out of her. It wasn't the first time he heard startling new information about her through other people, and it wasn't making any sense. Why were certain topics off limits for them?

At this point, his chin was aligned with the broadness of his limp shoulders with his head hung low. Alyssa reached for his hands, and their immediate contact was cold.

"John, say something," she said.

"I didn't know that," he said dryly. The response sounded forced, almost robotic. "I didn't know Randy was your first boyfriend."

"Does it change anything?"

"It shouldn't."

"But does it?"

Silence lingered. It was as if a moment of struggle couldn't pass.

John hesitated with his words, carefully deliberating which ones to string together. When he spoke, he did so slowly. "Al, I get it that you don't like talking about certain things but-"

"Because it's in the past and I wanna leave it there."

She was so quick to cut him off, her definitiveness nearly pinned John against the wall. He gritted his teeth but immediately felt a comforting pull from her hands.

"Baby, I know this may seem big: I kept the identity of my first boyfriend from you. Yeah, it was Randy, but I haven't thought of him as one in years. I don't want you to get to know my past, John. You're my present and that's all that matters."

He chewed on this for a few seconds before casually nodding his head. That's all that matters, John mentally agreed.

Alyssa cupped his cheeks. "I may not talk about everything with you, but that's because not everything is important. When I'm with you, the last thing I wanna do is dwell on trivial matter. I just want you."

"You and me," John said. His chest gradually relaxed from constriction. She was absolutely right: the man she called her boyfriend over a decade ago is trivial matter. The man she calls her boyfriend now is him and only him. What else could be more important than that?

"You and me," Alyssa said. She titled her head towards the door and squinted. "Let's get out of here?"

"Gladly." John said. He scooted back to grab his duffle bag and made sure not to let go of her with his other hand.

The both of them silently made their exit, but it didn't take long before John got bombarded by staff. They were barely ten feet away from his locker room when a whole throng came to them. Alyssa, accustomed to this typical deal in the World Wresting Entertainment and is at times the one to bombard others with her job, stood to the side and smiled. This came with John and she knew how much he loved his work. As she watched him deal with business, she couldn't help but think of her own. She looked around backstage and noticed the exposed wires, tall walls, and colorless structures. It always fascinated her how these dull and lifeless buildings housed so much entertainment and people.

There was one person, in particular, she was itching to talk to. John was still talking business which provided the perfect window. She snuck away from the busy crowd and managed her way through the empty hallways. There was no one around for company except the questions swirling around in her head. It didn't take long before she reached the room she was looking for; getting around the arena and locating people was an automated skill and part of her job.

Lifting a firm fist, she knocked on the door.

"Come in!"

And she did, but the sight she walked into made her want to retrace her step. She'd seen Randy without a shirt plenty of times before but this time felt uncomfortable. His jeans were hugging his hips a little tighter and the sweat was cascading down his stomach a little too slowly.

Alyssa was only able to avert her eyes when Randy's voice piped in.

"Alyssa! Hey!"

She brought her eyes up to his face and the reasons for finding him quickly hit her. She didn't waste a beat. The anger simmered fast. "Does it make you happy trying to ruin any chances of me being happy?"

Randy stood in complete silence. "Uh…lemme, lemme put on a shirt."

She watched him walk across the room. "When will you stop, Randy?"

He pulled a fresh tee over his head and looked at her calmly despite his confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Why would you tell John we dated back in high school?"

Randy raised his eyebrows. He wasn't aware she even remembered this. "I didn't."

"I didn't either, so who else would've?"

Good question, Randy thought. It stirred something inside of him he didn't even know was there. "Look, I know it's been years since that happened and yes, you've spent a decade trying to act like it never did. But we're not the only people on this earth that knows our past, Alyssa. I didn't tell John anything."

"You're the only one who would!"

Randy snapped his head to the side as if he'd been slapped. In some sense, this feeling was much worse. He looked at her head on. "For what? So you two could shove it in my face some more that I lost you? That I don't have you and he does?" Randy shook his head and exhaled. "After all these years Al, I'm obviously not over you, but I'm done wishing, subconsciously scheming, and hoping we're getting back together. I didn't tell John anything. There's no benefit of talking about our past when you obviously don't want me in your future."

Alyssa watched as Randy turned his back to gather his belongings. When he looked at her again, his eyes glazed over. "I admit, my hands haven't been clean. That doesn't give you the right to just accuse me of every bad shit that happens to you."

Randy's line of vision fell to the floor as he walked his way out of the room. The answers Alyssa longed for suddenly became secondary to feelings of guilt and confusion. If Randy didn't tell John, who did?

She forced herself out of the room but wasn't sure what to do next. The walls didn't look any less dull but soon enough, she found herself perched up against one. There was no where else for her to go. Anywhere else, she still wouldn't know who told John.

Then, it dawned on her. Why couldn't she just ask him herself?

She eyed the white wall ahead and shook her head. Who was she kidding. For someone who was so adamant on not speaking about her past, why should she be the one asking questions? Why does it matter who told John, anyway? Whoever it was couldn't do any harm to them.

Right?

* * *

Randy was mulling over the table filled with coffee cups, donuts holes, and croissant sandwiches when an unfamiliar voice spoke for his attention. He'd been ignoring it at first, determined to focus solely on his breakfast selections; but it'd gotten much louder, he had to glance over.

"So you must feel my pain."

Randy heard this crisp and clear, but the voice was still unfamiliar and so was the face. "Excuse me?"

"Do you not remember our conversation at the bar?"

At the bar? What bar? Randy's mind was still trying to get away from the food next to him and this new set of thoughts wasn't any better. All this thinking before sunrise was doing him no good.

"You know what, never mind. You were drunk. You probably don't even remember me."

Randy watched the woman in front of him tuck some of her brown locks behind her ear before walking away.

"Wait a minute," he said.

She turned slowly and stared.

"Wait a minute. Why don't you remind me your name? Now that we're sober and all."

"Candy," she said.

As he desperately tried to process this name he swore he'd never heard of, the woman's face blurred into the background as Alyssa emerged from behind. He wasn't expecting to see her so soon and her hardened stare wasn't making it any easier. The glare in her eyes was enough to force him back to the table he'd been looking at. The problem was, even with all the food in front of him, all he could see was Alyssa.

To his surprise, she stopped walking once she reached the table. Randy imagined her trying to figure out what to eat- something he'd been failing to do the last couple minutes. He grabbed a croissant sandwich without further thought and didn't bother with the coffee. He figured he might as well spare the both of them and began his way down the hallway.

"Randy!" Alyssa called out.

Her voice paralyzed him.

"Randy," she said more softly.

He hadn't gotten the chance to turn around and it surprised him to find he didn't have to. Alyssa was in front of him now and they were eye to eye.

"Listen, I'm sorry about last night. You're right. I shouldn't be pointing fingers."

Randy nodded slowly. "Yeah, it's fine." He averted his eyes elsewhere, anywhere else but at Alyssa. He couldn't possibly keep his gaze at the one thing he wanted but couldn't have. The tease would be brutal. He cleared his throat. "I gotta-"

Alyssa's words came out like vomit as she her mind fumbled through all the recent stories. "Have- have you met the new employee? She's some part of backstage."

Randy didn't understand the relevance of this question or why she was even trying to keep up a conversation with him. "Uh…"

"The girl that was just here."

"Oh, Candy?"

"Sure. Yeah, Candy."

Randy drew his eyebrows closer. "Is that not her name?"

"Well, she told me her name was Stacy. And she also told me John was the reason she got hired."

"Hmm. She told me things, too. I was too drunk to remember, but apparently, we met at a bar."

Alyssa rolled her eyes. This didn't surprise her. "She's full of bull."

"Yeah, I guess." Randy shrugged. Then, something started jogging his memory. "But now that I think about it, I do remember having a conversation with some stranger."

"With her, you think?"

"Maybe? I don't know. She was saying something about feeling my pain."

"Your pain?"

"I don't know. I'm trying to remember that night, but I keep drawing a blank."

"Is it possible you told her we dated back then?"

Randy felt automated to say no- it sounded ludicrous since that fact had been buried a long time ago- but as he thought of it some more, he realized it was could be reality. "Possibly?"

"And it's possible she ran to John and told him all about it," Alyssa concluded. "Damn. That girl sure knows how to get around, in and out of bed."

Randy stood in silence as he tried to make sense of everything. This morning had been full of surprises; none he really wanted anything to do with. He still couldn't decide if it was good Alyssa was talking to him or not. Either way, he sought it best to keep his eyes and mind off of her. "Listen, I gotta get ready. I hope that Candy, Stacy girl doesn't cause trouble."

"Me too," Alyssa said. She watched as Randy walked away, feeling an unsettling amount of disappointment with his departure.

* * *

Work. That was supposed to be his sole motive today. As John walked through bland halls of the arena, he found trickles of distraction interfering. There were workers unraveling wires, producers voicing out demands, and wrestlers roaming around with food and crumbs around their mouths. The air was thick with agenda and although John was aware of his fair share, his mind couldn't help but wander off to his surroundings. There was finally something possibly more frantic than his mind. He was more than ready to celebrate that fact by observing it all but what his relentless eyes found made him take a full stop.

It wasn't just Candy propped up against some wall, but it was Randy too. Candy and Randy were there- together. As soon as visions of them merged into one, John's feet continued to move and so did his mind.

Randy and Candy knew each other? How? Was he behind all the snaky things she'd done? If he was…

Before John was able to finish the thought, he found himself plowing towards the other man. He barely saw the hazed look in Randy's eyes mere seconds before their skin connected. John charged at his sides, momentarily lifting him off the floor only to crash him to the ground.

Randy's hands went up in defense which allowed John free reign to take a hard blow to his jaw. No words percolated from either men, not even as the crowd began to form around them.

"John!"

John connected his fist to Randy's cheeks, instantly leaving a gauge, before getting pulled back by a pair of arms. It wasn't the physical force that got his attention but the voice that came with it.

"John, stop it! Get off of him!"

Alyssa, John saw. It was Alyssa.

All the tension in his body froze as he gathered himself to a straighter stance. His eyes glazed over at Alyssa and he couldn't help but wonder why the hell she sounded so defensive over Randy. Still.

"What are you doing?"

"You see that-" John pointed at Candy and Randy. "They know each other. Put the two and two together and tell me what the fuck they're doing."

John walked off hastily, but Alyssa tailed him to the corner.

"John, Randy has nothing to do with Candy. He told me how she got a hold of him when he was drunk. This is all her-"

"Are you done? Huh? Are you done defending Randy now?"

John's stagnant harsh demeanor took away all of her words.

"Whether he had anything to do with Candy or not- whether it was him who made her rub it in my face that he was your first boyfriend- he had that long coming to him. He's deserved that hit; I've kept my hands off for a damn long time now, Alyssa."

She swallowed the forming bulge in her throat but still could not utter a sound.

"I hope you realize how unworthy he is of everything you do for him before he takes everybody away from you."


	22. The Heart Couldn't Choose

**Let's all take this moment to rejoice the fact that I didn't take 3 months this time. Halle-freakin-lujah! Thank you to those who read, favorited, and alerted this story. And special shout outs to those who reviewed the last chapter: Cena's baby doll, awesomeone21, therealchamps, my time is now, and 1222mercedes1222. Now, let's get on with this chapter. Enjoy everyone!**

* * *

"Alyssa."

The brim of her lashes were salting as she turned to see the dishevelment of Randy Orton.

"Alyssa," he said again. He mirrored her expression, physically amplified by the wrinkles on his shirt and the drying blood on his cheek. There was obvious caution in his steps when he walked towards her. "I'll talk to John. I'll let him know the whole truth and that I was only trying to get things straight with Candy."

Alyssa had her arms limply folded over her chest with her shoulders pressed against the wall. When she spoke, solemnity erupted from her voice. "You know Randy, I feel like this is more about him and me than it is of you and Candy."

Randy curled in his fingers. "Maybe, but he should know I have no association with that girl. I can't have John keep thinking I want you guys apart."

"I get that but at the same time, he's gonna have to understand that yes, there may be people out there with bad motives- people out there who don't want us together- but it shouldn't affect us; they're not in the relationship. I feel like he's letting others play such a big factor. Hell- I- I leaped whole heartedly into this. Can't he have the same faith in me?"

Randy felt himself shrinking. This wasn't the first time he'd seen defeat succumb her delicate features, and the only difference now was, he resisted all urges to hold her. His voice would have to be enough. "You guys will talk and work this out."

"But I don't even know if he wants to talk to me," Alyssa said. John had left her with ill-words which she easily translated into a threat. _Before Randy takes everybody away from you. _She didn't know what to make of it. And as the layers and layers of her feelings continued to strip her, she began to feel this itch of wanting to be in Randy's arms. It was the one place she'd found herself in numerous times before, in several different parts of her life. But she kept her distance and instead, moved away from the concrete behind her. A gush of air passed through her hair and seeped onto her neck, mingling with her sweat.

"John is crazy about you. He's not gonna let this get in the way of anything. I know this is all new to you, but it is for him, too. It'll work itself out, so don't stress yourself out."

Alyssa hugged herself and nodded in silence. There was something real sweet about Randy when he wanted to be. And that's exactly what she's known for most of her life, up until the last few months. Up until John.

"And I'll do my part to stay away. You two deserve a Randy-free vacation."

Alyssa's eyes gleamed at his humor. And at the truth. Her stare lingered, and she noticed the mark on his face. "You bled."

"I did?" Randy drew his hand up and felt the moist cut. "I did, huh. It's the least I deserve."

Not sure whether to agree or disagree, Alyssa instinctively moved closer to circle her arms around his muscled torso. She nursed her cheek with the fabric of his shirt, exhaling deeply behind her teeth. This caught him by surprise, and although she didn't see his reaction to prove that, she knew this was exactly what she needed to get through the rest of the day.

* * *

The harsh clang of barbells falling by John's feet wasn't enough to divert him from flashbacks of earlier. He was in a room full of equipment and free of people- a dream setting to a wrestler right before a show- but his mind drifted off to places far from exercise and working out. Instead, images of Alyssa's firm demeanor after she'd peeled him off Randy haunted him. The concern in her eyes was obvious, but it was for who John couldn't decide upon. Fact was, Alyssa had stood up for Randy yet again. It was Randy's side she took right away. It was Randy's ass she tried to save. It was Randy, Randy, Randy.

It's always been Randy.

With this thought, John allowed his knees to unbuckle beneath him. He slumped onto the ground letting gravity take reign. Somehow, even breathing became a difficult task. Whether it was anger or jealousy directing these actions, John knew it was doing great lengths to sustain him from productivity. His eyes had been glued to more ground than his feet had covered all day. He had severe withdrawals of Alyssa and her company and her kiss and her touch, but it was Randy she was thinking about. It was probably Randy she was with right now.

And that thought drove John absolutely crazy. He just wanted it to go away. His emotions had never been so controlling; he felt like a slave. Every passing minute left him in shambles from the last, working relentlessly to further infuse confusion and frustration. He wanted to be Alyssa, but Randy was making it irreconcilably difficult. And worse part was, she wasn't making it any easier.

Huffing, John stood up to lift the fallen weights for a standing barbell curl. He did so again and again and again, easily catching a natural rhythm. The mirror in front of him proved useless, his vision was far too blurred by his uncanny desire of falling into oblivion, to notice the way his biceps constricted with each move.

Why were Randy and Alyssa so unbreakable? She stuck up for him over and over, despite everything he's done, with seemingly no regard for anybody else. Was this how it's going to be with Alyssa?

Unable to even begin to explore the answer, John forced himself into contemplating which heavier load of weights to take on. Robotic tendencies, like the Prototype he once claimed to be, was the only way he'd get through the rest of the day.

* * *

A simmering field of disappointment shot through Alyssa when she checked her phone for the umpteen time. This blow was just as hard to endure as the first, the fifth, and the last, because the result was all the same: there was still no text back from John. It'd been hours since she left him a message asking him to see her. After sitting alone hopelessly backstage, she was beginning to think it'd be better if she went elsewhere. At least she wouldn't be tortured with every little sound hoping it was John. She wouldn't be whipping her head side to side like a loose door in a hurricane. This was torture. All she wanted was a chance to see him, a chance to be together, a chance to make it right. She didn't intend for John to feel second to Randy, it was simply her guilt that pushed her to his defense. And to have the two men, the two people she's only ever cared about, in a physical brawl was just something she could not take. It horrified her to imagine what damage could've been done to either of them. She pulled back John hoping to deflect the affliction but the look on his face when he saw her- now ingrained to memory- looked just as devastating. And his words that followed further confirmed that with John, there could be no Randy.

How did things get this way? How did it turn into having one or the other? Why did it have to be a choice?

Alyssa had been good at keeping her distance from Randy. For the first time in years, she'd ventured off in this new phase of life without her best friend- without Randy. Albeit the fact that it was going well, she refused to believe that she was doing it for anybody but herself. If she was going to cut Randy out of her life, it would have to be for her and her only.

John, she hoped, would understand that. She also hoped that he knew there was no choice to be made and that there was no competition. After all, the heart couldn't choose who it was it fell for. But somehow, John was still not talking to her.

Taking her chin from the palm of her left hand, she straightened out her wrist and stood up. Enough was enough. She could wait for his text without being in his proximity. At this point, it wouldn't have made a difference. It was obvious John wanted space, and she was done denying that.

She snatched her purse and slung the thin leather strap around one shoulder. Her steps grew steadfast as her journey out of the arena continued. It was like her body was finally beginning to reject this place and by the time the outside air whipped her face, utter relief engulfed her frame. She could breathe. She fished her purse for her keys and as the jingling metals surfaced her fingers, somebody came up beside her.

"Alyssa."

Her fingers loosened their grip. She snapped her head to the side and opened her mouth only to close them in a firm line.

"You and John obviously have communication problems."

"You know Stacy, I don't know what's keeping you around, as if you have some relevance in our lives, but if I were you, I'd get one of my own."

"News flash, this is my life. John and I-"

"John and you had something, yes. And quite frankly, that's none of my business. But that's all over now. It's in the past, Stacy. You should leave it there."

"Oh?" Stacy furrowed her eyebrows and pretended to look hurt. A smirk tugged at the ends of her lips. "Well, since we're giving each other advice now, I should probably tell you that next time you get in bed with Cena, wrap your legs around his neck with no pants and no underwear on. He really likes that."

Alyssa's hand twitched as the other woman sauntered off into the distance. She sure looked pleased with herself and Alyssa wanted nothing more than to slap it right out of her face.

"That did not just fucking happen." Alyssa's eyes followed the perpetrator, failing to dull the palpitations. She wanted to hit the girl and forget about her all at the same time. It was ridiculous. "I don't need this right now. I don't fucking need this."

Alyssa hastily grabbed her keys and clicked open her car door. If one thing was for sure, she needed to get the hell out of there.

* * *

11:00 in big red letters was the last thing Alyssa remembered seeing before drifting off into involuntary sleep. A rustle erupted from behind her, shortly after a door swung open, waking her instantly. Being a light-sleeper was a blessing and curse at the same time, but now that it was John she was seeing, it proved to be nothing but a gift. She rubbed her freshly parted eyelids and sat up. The sweat she'd accumulated during sleep was sticking to her back, making her silk shirt feel like second skin. She watched closely as John dumped his duffle bag on the floor before heading straight to the bathroom. He didn't once take a glance her way. Sighing, she eyed the clock and read 2:00. Raw had been over for hours; she wondered where he'd been this whole time.

After a few minutes, John retreated back into view but still said no word to her.

"Is this my punishment for having Randy in my life?"

John gritted his teeth and knelt beside his duffle bag. As he rummaged through it, he said, "I'm just trying to accept where your priorities are."

"My priorities? John, I'm with you. I'm your girlfriend. That's where my priorities are."

For the first time in several hours, John looked at her. "Oh yeah? That's not how it looked earlier."

"I've kept some healthy distance from Randy, but I just couldn't watch you guys fight-"

"And you're the first to jump in to defend him." John straightened out his legs and reached his peak height. The look on his face was unreadable even though his tone was laced with anger.

"I was just tryna let you know he had nothing to do with what Stacy has done. I wasn't trying to cover up for him. I just wanted you to get things straight."

Exhaustion had been tugging on his muscles all day and this was still no break. "You know Alyssa, we don't have any problems without him."

She curled her fingers possessively over the white duvet. "But you make him a problem when he doesn't have to be."

"I make him a problem?" John pointed at himself, raising both eyebrows. "Hell, he was the reason you and I were apart for three weeks. Three fucking weeks! I respect the fact that you wanted to forget what happened to you, but don't undermine the fact that I pushed aside my pain for you. It hurt like hell to know that you couldn't even tell me the truth, Alyssa. And that you let it keep us apart. You let me keep thinking you and Randy were actually sleeping together. But you know, I've been trying damn hard to forget all of it- just to be with you."

The starchy pause thickened the airways in Alyssa's throat, and she immediately feared what he was about to say next.

"But I feel like there's so many things in the way."

"Nothing is in the way, John. This is who I am, and I can't change any of it. You don't think I would've changed things if I knew it'd hurt you? Randy- Randy's all I've ever known- all I've ever had. Yeah, he's over-possessive and attached, but I guess I've been of him, too. I grew up with his presence- from childhood, to teenagehood, to adulthood- he was always there. I've grown scared to loose that. Overtime, we learned to stand by each other no matter what, because we've didn't wanna end up alone."

"But you have me."

"I know I do, but does that mean I have to lose him, too? I see how toxic he is to our relationship, which is why I've taken the steps to cut him off. But John, I wanna do it because I said so. Not because you said so. I don't wanna resent you later. I don't want us telling each other how to live our lives. This is me, and I know it's not easy being with me."

"No, it hasn't been easy."

"I've never been in a real relationship, and you knew that going into this."

John dropped his head, his guards instantly dissipating as he did. He moved towards the bed, and joined his girlfriend, sitting directly in front of her. "I did know that. And I got caught up on being scared that Randy could just take you away from me."

"I'm here, John." She reached for his hands and squeezed his fingers. "You have me in a way no one's ever had me. No one can take that away even if I wanted them to. So please, can we just focus on us? We've had our minds floating above other people ever since we started this, we need some Al and John time."

John's lips perched up in relief for the first time all day. He didn't say another word but instead used one of his big hands to cradle Alyssa's cheek right before giving her a kiss.


	23. One More Thing

**My updates just keep coming in! I had a lot of making up to do, so here's more of my eager attempts. Thank you to awesomeone21, therealchamps, Cena's baby doll, 1222mercedes1222, and all the new readers and supporters. You guys are awesome, and I hope you enjoy this one. **

* * *

Alyssa bit the tip of the gel pen lodged between her middle and index finger. With both legs folded under most of her weight, she scanned the drying ink stroked on the stark white sheet of paper fit snug on a clipboard. She'd been writing out a list for the past half hour but was no where close to completion. This had to be perfect, and perfection was taking her a whole lot of time. Thankfully, the plush cushions on the fainting couch she sat on was providing optimal comfort.

It was nearly time for the sun to rise, but as she sustained herself within the curtain-enclosed hotel room, she did not care for the rest of the world nor sleep. All she cared about was this forming list in front of her.

"Come back to bed."

Alyssa released the pen from her teeth and looked up, struggling to see John through the dimness. The only source of light was coming faint from right beside her with John stuck in the shallow side of darkness. Her straight hair slipped further down her back as she settled the clipboard closer to her body. "I'm doing something baby. I'll be there soon."

Without replying, John etched himself to the edge of the bed and peeled the duvet off his bare body. The wooden floor creaked suddenly as it carried his heavy weight with each step. Making his way towards Alyssa, he stopped at the foot of the couch.

"Babe, it's almost 5 o'clock." He reached down to lace his fingers gingerly through her hair, wondering what she could possibly be doing at this untimely hour.

"I'm trying to plan my day off."

He glanced over at the piece of paper in her possession and read. "Gym, t-shirt design meeting, house show prep- it looks like you've written my schedule."

"Exactly." Alyssa looked at the list as John took a seat next to her. "I'm trying to figure out where I can fit myself in your work day without being a disturbance."

John snaked his large palm to her lower back and smiled. "It's simple really: all day."

"All day?"

A curious eye looked his way.

"Yes, baby, all day. We'll be attached at the hip. We can even handcuff ourselves to each other if you'd like."

Alyssa frowned. "You're making fun of me."

A soft chuckle passed through his lips, allowing the lamp's glow to catch his dimples. He began caressing the exposed skin in between her shirt and shorts. "I'm not. I'm just letting you know it's no problem if you wanna hang around all day with me. You don't have to try and squeeze yourself in."

"Are you sure?"

John moved his fingertips to stroke her hair. "I'm sure. I'd love it if you do. Now can you please go back to bed with me? I'm cold."

Alyssa moved the clipboard off her lap and laughed. "Well maybe if you put on a shirt, you wouldn't be so cold."

"Eh… I have other things in mind that could keep me warm." John's lips formed a smirk before he easily pulled his girlfriend on his lap to face him.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Her eyes were tinged with slight surprise at his advance, seeming as though he'd been asleep just less than five minutes ago.

"Trying to get our day started." John planted kisses along her collarbone while his large hands secured her hips.

"But I thought you wanted to go to bed? And we don't have to go gym until six thirty." Her clammy hands were placed on his shoulders while her chin rested atop his hair.

He parted his lips from her skin to look her straight in the eye. "Here is just fine. And we might not even have to go gym after what I do to you."

Hearing this instantly made Alyssa's breath take a hitch. Not only were his words starting to do crazy things to her but his stare and his hands and lips were beginning to work their way all over her body. She pressed her breasts against his muscled chest in response, gripping her dainty finger around his buzzed scalp. A quiet moan escaped her lips when John hungrily covered them with his own. His fingers possessively twined with the hair behind her. The urgency and fire gunning his actions were so contagious, Alyssa was beginning to feel the relentless ripples of her own carnal desires. Being with John after years of inaction had awoken this suppressed side of her and after getting yet another break the last three weeks, she was more than ready to continually surrender her mind and body to him.

* * *

"Cena, you're gonna run out of colors in the rainbow eventually."

John laughed at Alyssa's comment then winked at her. "That's why I'm gonna start picking ones outside of the rainbow."

Alyssa smiled brightly at him then back at the design sketch in her hands. The face of the WWE was getting ready to debut new merchandise, and it'd been a pleasure to come along for the meeting. Now they were spared with an hour's worth of free time before the whole roster had to head to the next arena.

"So, what do you wanna do? Are you hungry?" he asked.

"Well, I was thinking-" Alyssa moved in front of him so they were directly face to face. She wanted to see his reaction for this. "-we can grab a tuna pita sandwich down the street."

John smiled. "Okay, okay. So you weren't in bed with me last night because you were planning our meals?"

"That and I was trying to coordinate the fastest way to get to the American Muscle Car Exhibit."

Surprise registered through John's orbs. Cars were something he sought after on his days off- if ever even practically possible- but having Alyssa plan a way to incorporate it in his work day was a special treat. "Wha- I- I didn't even know there was one around here."

"Five miles, in Blossom Hill," she said loud and proud. There was something cute about witnessing John turn into an excited child.

"Well, well, my sweet girlfriend planned this surprise for me."

Alyssa linked her hands with his. "And we only have an hour so we better get going."

A smile formed John's face for all American muscle, but the admiration he had for Alyssa was making it a permanent one. He couldn't stop looking her way even as they got into their taxi, then into the Exhibit. There, rows and rows of cars- ranging greatly in style, size, and color- stood before him, all at the expense of his enjoyment. His eyes danced, an overwhelming thrill filling the air. John clasped Alyssa's hand as they sauntered through the aisles, stopping at each and every one of the vehicles he didn't already own.

Alyssa looked at her boyfriend, realizing this was as much fun for her as it was for him. She knew nothing about cars to the extent that he did, but watching his passion exude through his inability to stop talking and staring was so special. And the fact that he wouldn't let go of her hand made it even better.

Minutes passed, and they kept passing. John had no sense of time by the time he finished surveying all the cars he wanted to.

"Wow, baby. Thank you for taking me here." John looked around the whole place from left and right then stopped at his favorite view: Alyssa. She smiled.

"There's one more thing, and I think we have just enough time to suit you up."

John lifted his eyebrows and echoed her words. "One more thing?"

"There's a track right behind this building. I scheduled you in for a lap."

"Wha- is- is today a Christmas day I've never heard about or something?"

Alyssa giggled. "Silly boy. You deserve this any day."

John dropped his head with a grin on his face, wondering how the hell he got so lucky. Before he was able to muster up the fitting words of gratitude, Alyssa was already directing him outside.

* * *

John was more than pleased when he saw Alyssa patiently waiting for him at the gorilla.

"Baby, you're gonna needa give my cheeks a little break," he said.

Instead of delving into his sweat-trickled arms like she'd planned, Alyssa stepped back and teased him. "So you want me to go away or what?"

"No, I'm kidding. I just don't know what I did to deserve this permanent smile on my face."

She gave a smile of her own in response before tiptoeing to plant him a kiss. "We needed this day together, and I just wanted to show you that we don't have to go far to feel like we're on vacation."

"Mmm." John kissed her again. This time was much longer. "I'ma miss you when you go back to work tomorrow."

"I'll still be close by, but let's not think about that yet. We still have the rest of the night." She continued their kiss but noises began to surround them, ultimately breaking their contact.

Alyssa firmly placed her hand on his bare abdomen in pursuit to move him further from the gorilla. Since his segment in the show was over, other superstars began plaguing the area to wait their turn on the runway. Among the crowd was a distant Randy Orton who quickly glanced their way only to look the other direction. Both John and Alyssa noticed his presence but it was ultimately her who shuffled them away from everybody else.

It was later that night, in their hotel room, when John recalled that exact event to memory. He was watching Alyssa riffle through her stuff for tomorrow. "Al?"

"Yeah?" she stopped what she was doing and looked up at the man with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Is it weird that I got a good kick out of you ignoring Randy earlier?"

Alyssa narrowed her eyes. "Who's Randy?"

John wanted to chuckle but instead felt a small burst of regret for bringing up the infamous name. "I'm sorry. That was unnecessary."

She shrugged as she turned her attention back to her belongings. "Hey, don't even worry about it. It was refreshing for me too."

A sudden knock came to the door, automatically magnetizing their eyes to each other.

"I got it," John said.

Meanwhile, Alyssa zipped up her suitcase and pushed it over to the corner. She was finally ready for bed, it'd been a great but long day with John's work and barely any sleep. Soon, she was joined with his company again plus manila envelope in hand.

"It's for you."

"Me?" Her eyes fell to the contrasting black-label against the golden yellow. She took it into her own grasp and ripped open the cryptic package. Pulling out the contents inside, her mouth dropped simultaneously with her heart.

"What? What is it?"

Alyssa bounded her lips into a hyphen then looked up at John. "I stay corrected: that bitch is crazy."

She tossed the items to him, flinging it into the air with disgust.

In John's hands ended up being photos of him and Stacy in compromising positions in bars, restaurants, in bed, and in the shower.

* * *

Randy had thought long and hard about this. He'd mustered up enough will to get to the destination, but it was the follow through he was struggling with. Would this be worth the trouble? Should he get himself involved?

Fidgeting with the buttons on the sleeves of his white button-up, he eyed the black ink on his skin and contemplated. Surely this would be worth it if he'd stayed up all night planning it. Surely this would be worth it if he'd generated energy all day just for it. Surely this would be worth it; all for Alyssa.

Lifting his eyes, he stepped closer to the door in front of him and began to knock.

A moment passed- long enough for him to change his mind and walk away- but his feet stayed planted right where they were. Ferocious thuds collided with his rib-cage as the door opened slightly. For a second, all he saw was darkness filling the space between the door and the frame until a barely dressed woman appeared in sight.

Randy swallowed then smiled. "Hey there. Candy, right?"

When the person in front of him nodded then smiled, Randy knew things were going just the way he planned.

* * *

The pictures in John's hands were unbelievable. It nearly drained all the color from his face. "Al- these- these were-"

"No, no, you know what-" Alyssa quickly snatched the stash from him, not caring if she bent it off its immaculate form. "-this is insignificant to our day. Let's just trash it."

John helplessly watched his girlfriend build up a defensive wall. She was barely even looking at him now. "It is trash baby, but I could see it's got you shaken up."

"Well yeah, I mean-" She paused to look at him, her eyes defeated. "I could've gone without the imagery. But what're you gonna do."

John briefly closed his eyes, unable to endure more seconds of seeing Alyssa like this. It was the sound of paper tearing and ripping that forced him to look again. What he saw was a more angry Alyssa, belied by the way her petite frame was shaking in reaction.

"You know, she had the nerve to tail me into the parking lot yesterday." Her voice rose with every word. "And she told me how you like having naked legs around your neck."

John's face fell. A sudden, deep churning settled inside of him, making him unable to do anything but stand.

Alyssa, on the other hand, moved towards the trash to dump the glossy evidence of John and Stacy ever being physically together. And she stayed there, with her head hung low, chin almost touching her neck. She covered her mouth with her hand and breathed through it.

"Baby…" John had walked closer.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. I can't let anybody ruin our day, John. We had a good day. It's fine."

John could tell she was trying to convince herself just as much as she was trying to convince him. That sinking feeling was still going, but he knew it was best to ignore it. He faced Alyssa and pulled her into a tight embrace: one he was hoping would make her feel better. She didn't deserve any of this. She didn't deserve to hear and see things he'd done to another girl. She'd spent all day trying to make it be all about them, and this was what she ended up with. Stacy: the conniving, relentless schemer, who did nothing but try to bring harm to their relationship.

John hugged Alyssa tighter, curving his fingers into her hair. Tonight, it would be all about her. He'd make her forget Stacy ever existed; but tomorrow, tomorrow John vowed that he'd put Stacy in her place once and for all.

* * *

**Weeee! I'm editing and posting this at nearly 4 o'clock in the morning. Your thoughts? I'd love to know! Thanks (:**


End file.
